You’ve seen the cover. It’s that striking, slightly eerie image of nested figures that seems to be everywhere from Brooklyn coffee shops to airport lounges in London. Honestly, if you haven’t picked up the Like Mother, Like Mother book yet, you’re missing out on the exact kind of generational trauma deep-dive that makes for the best book club arguments. This isn’t just another domestic thriller or a dry family saga. It’s a messy, jagged look at how the secrets of our grandmothers end up living in our own skin.
Susan Rieger, the author, isn't playing it safe here.
Most people know her from The Heirs, but this feels different. It’s sharper. The story follows three generations of women in the Lila-Zelda-Nell lineage. It kicks off with an obituary, which is a classic trope, but Rieger twists it. Lila, the matriarch and a formidable executive editor at a major newspaper, dies, and her granddaughter Nell decides to write the "real" story of her life. What she finds isn't just a career legacy; it's a labyrinth of disappeared mothers and cold compromises.
What People Get Wrong About the Like Mother, Like Mother Book
A lot of readers go into this expecting a cozy multi-generational tale. It’s not that. If you’re looking for Gilmore Girls vibes, you’re going to be disappointed. This is much closer to the sharp, unsentimental prose of writers like Elizabeth Strout or maybe a more journalistic version of Meg Wolitzer.
One of the biggest misconceptions is that the book is a mystery about a literal crime. While there is a "missing person" element—Lila’s own mother basically vanished when Lila was a child—the real mystery is psychological. Why do these women refuse to be "warm"? Why is professional ambition treated as a shield against maternal instinct?
Lila is a difficult character. She’s cold. She’s demanding. She’s brilliant.
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The Like Mother, Like Mother book asks a really uncomfortable question: Is being a "good mother" actually compatible with being a "great person" in the world of high-stakes journalism and power? Rieger doesn't give you the easy answer. She shows you the cost of Lila's success, which is the emotional starvation of her daughter, Zelda. Zelda, in turn, tries to be the "perfect" mother to Nell, but that over-correction has its own set of messy consequences. It’s a cycle. A brutal one.
The Real History Behind the Newsrooms
Rieger clearly knows her way around a newsroom. The sections of the book detailing Lila’s rise at the fictionalized (but very recognizable) papers feel authentic because they lean into the actual history of women in media during the mid-20th century.
- Lila isn't just a character; she's a composite of the women who had to be twice as tough as the men just to get a column.
- The transition from old-school print to the digital age serves as a backdrop for the generational shift between Lila and Nell.
- Journalistic ethics—or the lack thereof—play a huge role in how the "truth" of the family is uncovered.
It's fascinating. Truly. You see how the language of the newsroom—the "leads," the "buried facts," the "deadlines"—becomes the language through which these women communicate with each other. They don't have heart-to-hearts; they conduct interviews.
Why the Zelda and Nell Dynamic Hits So Hard
If Lila is the sun that everyone orbits, Zelda is the planet that got scorched. Zelda’s relationship with her mother is defined by what’s missing. She’s a math person, which feels like a direct rebellion against her mother’s world of words. I love that detail. It’s so specific. Zelda wants logic, proofs, and certainties because her childhood was built on the shifting sands of Lila’s career.
Then you have Nell.
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Nell is the bridge. She’s a journalist like her grandmother, which feels like a betrayal to Zelda. When Nell starts digging into the 1920s and 30s to find out what happened to Lila's mother, she’s not just doing a reporting project. She’s trying to find the "Patient Zero" of her family’s unhappiness.
The Like Mother, Like Mother book succeeds because it treats research as a form of detective work. Nell finds old letters, microfiche records, and forgotten addresses. It reminds me of that feeling you get when you look at an old photo of your parents before you were born and realize they were actually people with secrets you’ll never fully know. It's haunting.
The Structure Is Intentionally Fragmented
Rieger doesn't use a straight line. The narrative jumps. You get the present day, you get the 1950s, you get the early 1900s. Some readers might find this jarring, but it’s actually the point. Memory isn’t a straight line.
We learn about Lila’s mother, who was a "difficult" woman in an era that had no room for difficult women. The book touches on themes of mental health and social expectations without being preachy. It just shows you the cage and lets you watch the characters hit the bars.
Is It Actually Worth the Hype?
I’ll be honest. The first fifty pages can be dense. Rieger’s prose is intellectual. She uses words that make you want to keep a dictionary handy, but not in a way that feels like she's showing off. It just fits the world of these highly educated, high-achieving women.
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What really keeps you reading is the dry wit. It’s funny. In a dark, "I shouldn't laugh at this funeral" kind of way. The dialogue between Zelda and Nell is particularly sharp. They love each other, but they also know exactly where to twist the knife.
The Like Mother, Like Mother book also tackles the "Grandmother's Secret" trope but avoids the clichés. Usually, in these books, the secret is something like "she was a spy" or "she had a secret lover." Here, the secret is much more grounded in the reality of how women's lives were restricted and erased. It’s about the small, daily choices that add up to a life of regret or survival.
Practical Takeaways for Your Next Read
If you are planning on picking this up, keep a few things in mind. First, pay attention to the dates. The shifts in time are subtle but vital. Second, don't expect Lila to be a hero. She's a protagonist, but she's often deeply unlikable. That’s the strength of the writing.
- Look for the recurring motifs: Notice how the concept of "home" changes for each woman.
- Track the parallels: See how Nell's career choices mirror Lila's, even when she's trying to be different.
- Check the bibliography/influences: If you like this, you’ll probably want to look into the history of the New York Times or the Washington Post during the 1960s.
The ending is... polarizing. I won't spoil it. But I will say that it doesn't tie everything up in a neat little bow. It feels real. It feels like the way families actually work—with some questions answered and others left to rot in the basement.
How to Digest the Themes
Think about your own family tree while you read. We all have that one relative who is a "black box"—someone whose history is mentioned in whispers or not at all. The Like Mother, Like Mother book encourages that kind of introspection. It’s a book that stays with you long after you close the back cover because it forces you to look at the women who came before you as humans rather than just "grandma" or "mom."
The complexity of the female experience is the core here. It’s about the friction between being an individual and being a link in a chain. Nell’s journey to write the obituary becomes a journey to write her own future. It’s about taking the pen back from the ghosts of the past.
Actionable Next Steps
- Read with a notebook: There are so many characters and side-stories that it’s helpful to jot down the family tree as you go, especially when the narrative dives into the early 20th century.
- Compare the editions: Some versions of the book include interview material with Susan Rieger that sheds light on her research process regarding the newspaper industry; seek these out for extra context.
- Audit your own family history: After finishing, talk to an older relative about the "unspoken" members of your family. You might find a story that rivals the one Nell uncovers.
- Pair it with a memoir: To see how these themes play out in real life, read this alongside H is for Hawk or Wild Game by Adrienne Brodeur. The parallels in maternal complexity are staggering.