[♥] critique pls - do your heart, what you did to mine.

[jennifuh]

dA: http://jennifuh.deviantart.com/art/tear-you-apart-141871672

I never really AA, hmmm...

Critiques? All welcome.

[Red_Mist]

I think it looks fantastic. I'm thinking its a stylistic choice, but wheres the mouth? anyway, better than I can do so I cant give you more than that. Oh yeah, and nicely chosen theme in time for Halloween!

[heyy13]

Two things strike me immediatly. One it looks like she's falling over, and two i can't read her legs well below the thigh. It takes alot of hard squinting to see which is infront and which is behind. Glued togeather to the knee and then seperating like that rarely happens in real life and just looks odd.

Other then that it's a cute style and i like the way you've done the blood. I don't think it suffers without aa at all myself. :]

[jennifuh]

Oh yeah, I know what you mean .. sometimes if I quickly glance as it, I think one leg is another the other one. Hmm, make them furthur apart you say?

Yeah, she looked horrible with a mouth so then I changed the face shape and didn't like that either so just stuck with the original. XD

[EyeCraft]

Regarding falling over, have a look at some stills of people walking. I'm pretty sure with how far forward her centre of gravity is from her planted foot, the other leg would be much more infront of her. Changing this should also help to solve the legs being difficult to read which is infront of the other.

The head/face and hands are very blobby and ambiguous. Head is also quite big (even though it's obviously intended to be more cartoon proportions, I think it could maybe be reduced a little, just a suggestion).

The main thing that I notice is the face. It is, as I said, under-formed, and lacks any significant emotion. A blank expression which seems out of sync with the intended themes of the piece (that I receive, anyway). Omitting the mouth is crippling in this respect, since the mouth is integral to many, many expressions. Give more attention to the volumes and proportions of the head and face. Here's a pretty quick edit to give you and idea:



While I was editing I noticed you have a tonne of skin colours that are very similar that you could merge together. Any colours around the same value and hue can be average and merged.

The shading really needs a closer look. I did a tiny bit (legs). Need to think more in terms of the volumes and how/where exactly the light is hitting them. Belly and arms are problems in that respect atm.

[Maru]

I think if you balanced her legs out more like this (I assume you're making her look like she's running?) it would look like she could keep her balance, plus add readibility...I moved her hindleg back a bit in my edit and her foreleg straighter and further forward for this.

I also moved her shoulder down into a more natural position. I experimented and tried to give her a mouth, but failed Orz;;
I think that's more of a stylistic thing, it just seems to adds more emotion to the piece overall.


I hope this helps...

I love her hair though, it has a really nice flow to it ♥

[Ben2theEdge]

Having that little bit of negative space between the legs that Maru added is really good - negative space is often neglected but it is an important element. Although having her foot flat on the ground like in Maru's edit loses some of the dynamic feeling from the original.

[Tourist]

My two cents:
I think the idea and design are great.

The details of the hair are terrific.

The blood splatters are a great touch.

I think the hips are wrong.  They aren't wide enough, and they are tilted at a strange angle.  The legs are stuck on the bottom of the pelvis when they should be more on the sides.

I also think the running pose isn't quite right.  She is running to one side, but looking the other way, which kind of robs her pose of any strength.

If she is not supposed to be very threatening then this is fine, but given the blood and whatnot I assume she is supposed to be serious.  My suggestion is to have her moving the direction she is focused on.  A powerful stride coming forward, or a strong run with legs pumping, either would work.  Be bold!

Another option, I did a quick hack edit in paint to change her to a standing pose.  The lines of the legs are meant to point to the hole in her chest.



Hope this helps,
Tourist

[Helm]

Has it been established that the left hand (bloody one) is a stump? If not, it needs to be repixelled to be clear, needs to be slightly bigger and the dominating lines made plainer.

[Rydin]

I have domestic assault weapons lying around, so I decided to try out your girl's pose.

Here's my results:


Also, I want to point out the length of her saw versus the length of an actual saw.
Anyways, hope that's helpful.