tocky mockathon: round three

[tocky]

I'm trying to increase my output lately, get a portfolio together.

Anyhow, this is what I'm doing, today:

Crits, comments, on the roof and water especially, would be mighty appreciated.

Thanks. 

[Argyle]

When I look at this the thing that immediately catches my eye is this part of the roof, outlined with reddish-orange:



The way you have that part of it now throws me off as I can't find a way that the roof would work the way it is now with the blocky edge cutting into the slant where it's much different on the slant of the roof closer to us.

[ndchristie]

what purpose do the parts under the awnings serve?  if you can walk under them, you should probably have some sort of shadow to indicate that there is space there.  If you cannot, you should probably put an obstacle there.  either way, the sunny spot is playing with the spacial read.  the piece is nice though and i like the idea

[tocky]

If I read you right, the problem is sometimes you can walk under those awnings, and sometimes you can't, depending on the shape of the building.
Obstacles is a good idea, though. Does this work?

[ndchristie]

not really, although the new tile is fine .  the issue is a spatial one.  what i should have said is that without either the space filled or a shadow put in, the grass is visually above the roof (or at least on the same level) and it needs to sit under it .

[tocky]

Everything I tried using fills/shadows looks wrong, though - and besides that, I really don't want to be adding more greens to my palette, so shadows is kinda messy.

I think it's mostly a colour priority problem, does it work if I shift the roof to something warmer?

[ndchristie]

no, it works if you fill it in or put a working shadow under it...

it's not the kind of issue you can beat with hue changes

[tocky]

You can fix everthing with hue changes.

Wait, no - What I mean to say is that I can't come up with a fill or shadow tile that makes it work. I really don't know how to do the things you're describing.  I haven't been able to make anything that fits.

[tocky]

more stuff:


Edit:

[skamocore]

EDIT:



I really love the style  Your latest edit is a huge improvement on the characters.

I think the thick outline is a bit much, though, and doesn't really suit the style. I suggest remove it or use something more subtle, like what I have in my edit. I also played around with the colours a bit, mainly the grass, which I think should be a bit greener.