[WIP] moonlady, now with 30% more cheese.

[politopo]

Hello everybody. Hoping to become part of the community, I start posting a little sample.

  ---->   Alternate

It is still a wip, the moon lacks craters, and I think she is pillow shaded.
What do you suggest me?
Thank you in advance.

[TrevoriuS]

The torso should be a bit more arched horizontally, this mainly because the hips need to be rotated more for the legs to reach that position naturally and comfortably. The left leg comes to the right a bit with that, it may be nice to cross the feet there. Also the right foot reads reads wrong (as if it is twisted or something).
Its a very good start but you should fix these small issues.

[politopo]

Thanks for the suggestion, TrevoriouS.
But i think that it got bad while shading it, so I decided to start back from the beginning.
Here are the line-art


By politopo

and the new WIP version (very VERY WIP).


By politopo

What do you think? is it getting better? I also changed the palette because it looked too "flat" for me.
Thanks for your attention.

P.S. If someone of you feels like to use my line art, I would be pleased 

[Shrike]

i don't know a real lot about anatomy, but before you start shading again, fix the top foot.
It looks like she broke it or something. Also, its stacking much farther out than the bottom one, like the top leg is longer or something.

Otherwise, good job! like the way you did the hair.

[politopo]

Thanks coran, i will try.

[Atnas]

Don't lengthen her bottom leg, you had it shorter because it was foreshortened.

I liked the first one a lot more. The new one looks poorly done, mainly because of the very poor selout and foreshortening, and also because it doesn't contain the same bold look of the first.

On your first one, I believe that her right foot should be darker, you should do a little dithering with a darker shade of blue, and you should fix the pillow shading on some of her limbs.

I really like this, just don't lose the initial flair you had to start with. 

[Terley]

I can't see the 2 images in your last post  , so im looking at your first one politopo.

>>

I don't think the line on the darker side of her should be broken like that, I'd consider making it a more solid line. 

You could do more to this to shape the character, you've put some shading in but not added enough contrast to do it to do it any real favours. I've done a quick edit but it's just a suggestion, I like the angelic quality yours has.

Also tweaked some AAing in some places mostly the upper part of the moon, try to avoid AAing 45degree angles.

Good stuff, keep at it.

[Atnas]

I don't mean to derail the thread, but I've never heard the reasoning behind not AAing 45 degree angles. Is it because it just looks better? I've never really given anything the AA treatment that had 45 degree angles in it, so I wouldn't know.

[Sherman Gill]

When used badly, which is almost always the case, it blurs the image AND causes the outer edges of the 45 degree part of the curve to stand out more, so on the latter part it's actually doing the opposite of what anti-aliasing is intended to do.

[Terley]

Zoom into this, just AAing the line flat here is just bluring it and goes against the overall roundness that should be here. I tried to use the 45degree angle to push it out more using the shades available..



About generally AAing flat angles, some images need sharpness in small areas and AAing all 45degree angles for example can just blur that part unecissarily, usually making it less readable overall. Pixel art is all about smart placement afterall so don't just AA without means.

[Atnas]

Thanks to you both, I understand now.

[politopo]

Wow, many suggestions to work on  I will try to both correct the first version and to update the new one. But during week end...
Many deadlines this week...
I'm also uploading the newer versions once more, maybe they will show up for everyone this time.
Many thanks to all people.

[politopo]

hello.
Ready for the new update?


By politopo

still WIP. Please Command and Conque..errh Comments and Critiques

[politopo]

New version, almost complete?


By politopo

please say something, even "puah" 

[Feron]

fantastic improvement from original is all i have to say.

[politopo]

I forgot to ask:
Ddo you think that legs are fine now? I fear that feet still have some problems... 

[infinity+1]

to me, it looks like you've used that yellow shade on only the bottom of the other foot, so when it's all over the ankle like that (on the right leg), it messes with the way you see the feet. makes the one leg look odd.

[politopo]

it is because the bottom foot is supposed to poke out just a bit while tho other should be more exposed, and so more lit. But this is just in my mind maybe...

[Dusty]

I think the legs look fine now. Great fix and a great improvement overall.

[Terley]

damn why can't I see any of your images politopo   I've viewed this thread on about 4 different computers now, in different places and still I can't see any of em.. I really wanna see your progression.

[politopo]

Newer version with slight change on the left leg



Would you name it done?

@Terley, I used a different site for upload for your pleasure, if you see it let me know and I'll move the others too.

[Larwick]

I don't like how you've rendered her butt. It makes it look very flat and the lines are too dark and extreme. It just makes her look extremely saggy. The highlight is probably the main reason for this, don't highlight the edge, but rather somewhere closer to the middle to give the impression of a gradual curve.

Her higher foot to me looks like it's broken and rather than it being highlighted, it being a different colour of skin altogether. I'd also perhaps lessen the sense of columns of hair too.

That's my imput. 

[Rydin]

First thing that really sticks out is that the way you did the outline on the leg makes it almost imply that it's fuzzy.  It would add to the seductiveness of the piece if you implied a more smooth look to the outline, I mean, in my opinion.
And then, in the butt cheek area, the lighting is funky...almost pillow shaded or something in some spots.  I donno...funky lighting though.
Also, the way her left arm is placed makes it seem like she's struggling to sit the way she is--maybe it's over stretched or something? I think a more relaxed pose would add to the piece.

But I really like how this has come out so far.  Cool ^^

[politopo]

aggiornamento (update):



fixed the arm (I think. Figured out it was the shoulder was to much on the left)
about feet, I changed their position so that the bottom is no more visible.
I changed the lighting and, hopefully, fixed the butt (thanks Larwick).
I also made the outlines on the leg more continuous, and I find it makes it really better, thank you Rydyn.
about the hair, i like them this way, sorry if it is too much anime-inspired...
also the craters are more defined now, I think.
Opinions?
thanks everybody.

[Arachne]

I like the new palette and the limited use of colors, but I think you could make the color ramp slightly more even. The anatomy could also use some work, so I've made an edit to give you some ideas on how to improve it (although I didn't finish the feet).



I agree that the shoulder leaning against the moon looks uncomfortable. I'd just remove it, move her up a bit and give her more room for her feet. She could also use a bit more of a ribcage, so I'd also widen her torso a bit. Her hips look a bit flat, and the shading on her legs doesn't really give the impression of being more distant and angled away from the light source. The scattered single black pixels just add noise, and the same with the broken outlines. You also have a lot of banding going on, and the AA on the moon against the dark side could use some work, too.

Hope that helps.

[politopo]

First of all thanks Arachne, your comments and your edit are really helpfull. I will not leave the original concept (i would be a defeat  ), but trying to re-pixel the figure from scratch i came out with this new one. What do you people think about it? Which pose is the best?



P.S.: It seems I can't keep the same palette more than for a couple of versions.. 

[infinity+1]

ooh wow. the alternate rules. better than the original in my opinion. although, it seems like you could at least thin out that outline on the character by just a little bit.

[Atnas]

Seconded.

Also, the lighting on the back of the head could be rounder on the right by a few pixels.

[Rydin]

The new version is definitely cool, but I gotta vote the original.  You're almost there with it!  Just some cleaning and smoothing here and there and the original would be pretty much done, I'd say.
As with the new one, the lighting is much more dynamic, but you've got a truckload of reshaping and refining ahead of you still.  Not to say work is bad--I encourage you to do both versions .  I would go with the original though.

Good luck.

[Atnas]

I like the position of the moonlady in the first, but the detailed background of the first second.

COMBINE the two. 

[VictorR]

Great piece, edited some highlights and darkened it. Galaxy shouldn't be bright should it?

[politopo]

thanks everybody, i think i'll keep going with both.
The major thing i dislike in the second is the lack of hair, but adding some showed harder than I suppose.
@atnas combining the first and the first i would obtain... the first I suppose you meant you like old pose and new background?

what do you people think about the outline/halo in he new version?
and the palette?

[`Rob]

The alternate is just brilliant, the pose feels alot more natural and the use of colours is also really well donel. This peice has really come on a long way!

ps. beautiful edit Arachne.

[Atnas]

Yeah Politopo that's what I meant. XD Fixed it.

It's been said before but I think the halo should be thinned a little. It stands out a bit too much and doesn't look very refined. (a little AA couldn't hurt)