[CC] Hikage from Senran Kagura

[Rosier]

https://41.media.tumblr.com/639e7125869d48abe898bf6e438bdbfc/tumblr_inline_o3hipy8R0q1tyn0tw_540.jpg
Pose is based on one.

Shading is pretty rudimentary.  Chest I'm okay with, but the rest I'm lost.

[rocifier]

Yeah shading definitely needs work. Before shading I'd make a few tweaks to the anatomy. She is looking pretty good but here is my critique:

[Rosier]

Also touched up the darker bits of the hair.

[rocifier]

Hmm it's getting there. Definitely an improvement. I'd probably render the legs and crotch tighter more like this:



The upper torso still needs work too. I think it would help to study a skeleton so you can see the rib cage. For example the pecs rest on the ribs then the breasts on the pecs. There is a tutorial on it here: http://www.proko.com/anatomy-of-the-rib-cage-for-artists/
I recommend all of Proko's videos for learning anatomy. The key is to draw them out though, not just watch them.

[MysteryMeat]

Looking at it I'd try to reduce how much black there is in this.
It might help to use darker shades of the colors present instead to mark where they're at, in pixels black can be a bit tricksy because of how it pulls the eye away from the rest of the sprite.

There's a really good analysis on that here: http://kiwi-rgb.deviantart.com/art/Working-with-Black-in-sprites-119921694

[Rosier]

Not included, me attempting to reshade the breasts about ten times...

Added an attempt at shading the skin as well, but I don't quite think I'm getting the ribcage thing.

[rocifier]

Did you watch any of Proko's videos? He uses Loomis' construction technique which can help artists to draw the figure in any pose. It takes some practice to get right. But there is a great facebook group for critiques.

[Decroded]

I still find these colours a bit glaringly contrasted.
Especially the shirt for example the black and gold is too strongly contrasted so it flattems the forms.
The white pixels on shirt are also strange as if some kind of plastic specular yet the dark lines have no highlight?

[Rosier]

Did you watch any of Proko's videos? He uses Loomis' construction technique which can help artists to draw the figure in any pose. It takes some practice to get right. But there is a great facebook group for critiques.

I checked out the one linked, but I've found that stuff like that doesn't really work for me all that well unfortunately.

I still find these colours a bit glaringly contrasted.
Especially the shirt for example the black and gold is too strongly contrasted so it flattems the forms.
The white pixels on shirt are also strange as if some kind of plastic specular yet the dark lines have no highlight?

So make the not-black bits on the shirt even lighter?
There's a few varying designs for her shirt pattern, so I think I might choose one with a bit more readability in it in regards to the white spots used.


EDIT:  Lightened the shirt pattern to be a bit lighter, and replaced the pattern with another variant that's significantly more readable.

[rocifier]

Those colours are much easier on the eyes to look at. But there are still the same problems with the chest and head. To me the chest is just reading as an orange cloth with random brown wire tied all over it, not the form of two breasts. You'll need to find a way to study anatomy that works for you.