Language is a weird, living thing that evolves in the basement of the internet. One day you’re using a word like "perchance" to sound fancy or Shakespearian, and the next, it’s a massive viral sensation because a high school student decided to write the most unhinged essay in the history of the American education system. If you’ve spent any time on TikTok, Twitter, or Reddit lately, you’ve seen the phrase you can just say perchance floating around. It usually appears as a screenshot of a paper covered in aggressive red ink, and honestly, it’s one of the few internet memes that actually gets funnier the longer you look at it.
It started with Mario. Well, not the real Mario, but a student's philosophical interpretation of Mario the Idea versus Mario the Man.
The "Perchance" meme isn’t just a random joke; it’s a masterclass in how "main character energy" can collide with academic standards to create something legendary. We’re talking about a document that has been shared millions of times, spawned merchandise, and fundamentally changed how people use the word "perchance" in everyday conversation. It’s the ultimate example of a "so bad it's good" piece of writing that somehow feels like high art.
The Essay That Launched a Thousand Memes
The origin of you can just say perchance is a short essay titled "Mario, the Idea vs. Mario, the Man," purportedly written by a student and graded by a teacher who was clearly losing their mind. The essay is a chaotic fever dream. It opens with the line, "Everyone knows Mario is cool as f**k," which the teacher promptly crossed out with a note saying, "No."
But the real magic happens in the middle of the sentences. The student keeps inserting the word "perchance" as a standalone sentence or a weirdly placed transition. It’s like they discovered a "sophisticated" word and decided to pepper it through the text like salt on a steak that was already way too salty.
At one point, the student writes: "Keep it up, baby!" The teacher’s response? A blunt, red-inked "No." Then comes the crown jewel of the grading. The student uses "perchance" one too many times, and the teacher finally snaps, writing in the margin: "You can't just say perchance."
Except, clearly, you can. And the internet did.
The irony here is that the teacher’s correction actually became the catchphrase. It represents the struggle between the "rules" of English and the sheer, chaotic will of a writer who just wants to vibe. People started saying you can just say perchance as a rebuttal. It’s a way of saying that the rules don't apply if the energy is right.
Why This Specific Meme Stuck
Memes die fast. Most of them have the shelf life of an open avocado. So why are we still talking about this essay years after it first leaked onto the timeline?
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It’s the "Stomp a Turty" factor.
In the essay, the writer describes Mario’s actions as "crushing turts." The teacher, confused and likely tired, wrote "tyurtles" (and then corrected it to turtles) next to it. The sheer absurdity of referring to Koopas as "turts" while trying to maintain a philosophical tone about "the idea of Mario" is comedic gold. It taps into a very specific kind of humor—the juxtaposition of high-brow intent with low-brow execution.
Psychologically, we love a rebel. Even if that rebel is just a kid trying to hit a word count by using "perchance" every three sentences. It reminds us of being in school and trying to sound smarter than we actually were. We've all been there. We've all tried to use a "thesaurus word" to impress a grader, only to have it blow up in our faces.
The Anatomy of the Linguistic Error
Technically, the teacher was right. "Perchance" is an adverb meaning "perhaps" or "possibly." You can’t use it as a standalone sentence or a random filler without a subject or a verb. It’s archaic. It’s clunky. But in the context of the Mario essay, it acts as a rhythmic punctuation mark. It’s like a beat drop in a song.
- Student: Mario is cool.
- Student: Perchance.
- Teacher: STOP.
The teacher’s frustration is palpable through the screen. You can almost feel the red pen shaking. That’s the E-E-A-T (Experience, Expertise, Authoritativeness, and Trustworthiness) of the meme—it feels authentic because we have all had a teacher like that, or we are that teacher.
The Cultural Impact of Saying Perchance
Believe it or not, this has actually affected how people communicate online. "Perchance" has seen a massive spike in usage, but not in the way Shakespeare used it. It’s now used as a sarcastic "maybe" or a way to signal that you’re being intentionally pretentious for a joke.
If someone asks, "Are you coming to the party?" and you respond with "Perchance," you aren't just saying "maybe." You are referencing a specific corner of internet history. You are signaling that you know the Mario essay. You are, in a way, "stomping a turty" on the conversation.
This is what linguists call "intertextuality." It’s when the meaning of a word is derived from its relationship to another text. In 2024 and 2025, "perchance" is inextricably linked to Mario. You can't separate the two. It’s a linguistic permanent marker.
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How "Perchance" Broke the SEO Mold
Usually, keywords like you can just say perchance are driven by product searches or news events. But this is driven by pure vibe. People search for it because they want to see the image again. They want to show their friends the "crushing turts" line. They want to see the red ink.
For creators and writers, there’s a lesson here. Authenticity—even accidental, chaotic, failing-grade authenticity—resonates more than polished, "perfect" content. The student who wrote that essay wasn't trying to go viral. They were (presumably) just trying to finish an assignment. That raw, unfiltered weirdness is what people crave in an era of AI-generated slop and corporate-speak.
Honestly, the "Perchance" essay is the antithesis of modern AI. An AI wouldn't write "Everyone knows Mario is cool as f**k." It wouldn't call turtles "turts." It wouldn't use "perchance" as a sentence. The very things that made the essay "bad" by academic standards are the things that made it "human" by cultural standards.
The Philosophical Side: Mario the Idea vs. Mario the Man
Let's actually look at the "philosophy" presented in the essay, because it’s surprisingly deep if you squint. The writer argues that Mario is an "idea" that exists beyond the game. He represents the human spirit of jumping over obstacles.
"The lifekind. Perchance."
When the writer says "the lifekind," the teacher writes "Not a word." But isn't it? In the world of the essay, "lifekind" represents the essence of being alive and active. It’s a beautiful, nonsensical term. By dismissing it, the teacher is dismissing the student’s attempt at creating new meaning.
Maybe the student was a genius. Maybe they were a visionary. Or maybe they just didn't study. Either way, the debate between the "Idea" and the "Man" has become a genuine topic of discussion in gaming circles. We talk about Mario as a brand mascot (the Idea) versus Mario as a character who misses his brother and eats mushrooms (the Man).
How to Use "Perchance" Without Getting Roasted
If you want to adopt this into your own vocabulary, you have to understand the timing. Using it correctly—meaning "perhaps"—will make you sound like a Victorian ghost. Using it "wrongly"—meaning as a chaotic interjection—makes you part of the meme.
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- Use it as a one-word answer. When someone asks a serious question, just say "perchance" and walk away.
- Refer to "turts." If you're talking about turtles, tortoises, or even just obstacles in life, they are now turts.
- The "Gross" factor. The essay mentions "gross" in a way that the teacher also hated. Incorporate that.
The reality is that you can just say perchance has become a shorthand for "I'm being weird on purpose." It’s a linguistic flag.
Why We Need More "Perchance" in the World
We live in a world of "optimized" everything. Our emails are suggested by Gmail. Our texts are corrected by AI. Our essays are often run through checkers that strip away any personality in favor of "clarity."
The Mario essay is a reminder that clarity is overrated.
Sometimes, the most impactful thing you can do is be confusing. Be loud. Use words wrong. Write "perchance" where it doesn't belong. The teacher gave that student an "F," but the internet gave them immortality. In the long run, who really won? The teacher who followed the rubric, or the student who "crushed turts" all the way to the top of the search results?
Actionable Steps for the "Perchance" Lifestyle
If you’ve read this far, you’re clearly invested in the linguistic chaos of the Mario essay. Here is how you can actually apply the "Perchance" philosophy to your life and communication:
- Break the Rules of Tone: Next time you’re writing something formal, try inserting one (just one!) slightly informal word. See if anyone notices. It keeps people on their toes.
- Embrace the Red Ink: Don't be afraid to fail spectacularly. A boring "B" paper is forgotten in a week. A legendary "F" paper lives forever. If you’re going to fail, fail with style.
- Question the "Idea" vs. the "Man": Apply this logic to other things. Star Wars: The Idea vs. Star Wars: The Movies. Cooking: The Idea vs. Cooking: The Dirty Dishes. It’s a fun way to look at the world.
- Check the Source: If you haven’t seen the original image, go find it. Look at the handwriting. Notice the specific way the "F" is circled. It’s a piece of history.
The next time someone tells you that you’re doing something wrong, or that your grammar is off, or that you’re being "too much," you know exactly what to say. You don't need a long explanation. You don't need to defend yourself.
You can just say perchance.