Will You Be My Galentine: Why February 13 Is Actually Better Than the 14th

Will You Be My Galentine: Why February 13 Is Actually Better Than the 14th

Valentine’s Day is stressful. It just is. There is this weird, suffocating pressure to find the perfect gift, book the impossible reservation, and perform romance like you’re in a 90s rom-com. But then there’s the 13th.

Galentine’s Day.

Honestly, the question will you be my galentine has become more meaningful for a lot of people than any traditional romantic proposal. It’s the "anti-holiday" that actually stuck. Most trends born on television die out within a season or two, but this one? It hit a nerve. It tapped into something real about how we value our friendships.

We’ve all been there—sitting at a desk, looking at the calendar, and realizing that while romance is great, it’s the group chat that keeps us sane. This isn’t just about waffles or drinking mimosas on a Tuesday morning (though that’s a big part of the lore). It’s about acknowledging that the platonic loves of our lives deserve a dedicated space on the calendar.

Where This All Started (And No, It Wasn't TikTok)

If you’re looking for the origin story, you have to look at Amy Poehler. Well, specifically her character Leslie Knope from Parks and Recreation. In the 2010 episode titled "Galentine's Day," Knope gathers her closest female friends for a brunch of frittatas and gift-giving.

"What is Galentine's Day? Oh, it's only the best day of the year," she famously said.

It was a throwaway plot point that turned into a global phenomenon. Usually, when a brand or a show tries to force a holiday, it feels corporate and gross. This felt different. It felt like permission. Permission to celebrate your "person" even if that person isn't someone you're dating. Since 2010, the search interest for the phrase will you be my galentine has spiked every single February, often rivaling traditional Valentine's Day searches in specific urban demographics.

Retailers like Target and Hallmark weren't the ones who started it. They were actually late to the party. They saw people hosting their own parties and scrambled to make cards and pink-themed balloons. By 2017, the holiday was basically a staple of the American February calendar.

The Psychology of Friendship Over Romance

Why does this matter so much? Because adult friendship is hard.

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Life gets in the way. Work happens. Kids happen. Moving across the country happens. We often take our friends for granted because they are the "stable" part of our lives while we chase romantic partners or career goals. Galentine’s Day flips that script. It forces us to look at our friends and say, "I see you, and you make my life better."

Research from the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships has frequently pointed out that strong platonic bonds are often more predictive of long-term health and happiness than romantic ones. Yet, we have very few rituals to celebrate those bonds. We have weddings for partners. We have baby showers for parents. We have… happy hour for friends? Galentine’s Day filled a ritualistic void.

Creative Ways to Ask Will You Be My Galentine

You don't just text it. I mean, you can, but where’s the flair? If you’re going to do it, do it right. People get weirdly competitive about this, but you shouldn't. The best ways to ask are usually the ones that reference an inside joke or a shared history of survived disasters.

  1. The Nostalgia Trip. Send a physical card. Remember those? A handwritten note tucked into a mailbox is basically a shot of dopamine in 2026. Mention that one time in 2019 when everything went wrong and they were the only one who didn't judge you.

  2. The Digital Care Package. If your bestie lives in a different time zone, send a DoorDash gift card specifically for "brunch-related emergencies" and a link to a shared playlist.

  3. The Low-Stakes Invite. Sometimes the best way to say will you be my galentine is just to show up with a bag of takeout and a promise not to talk about work for three hours.

The pressure to make it an "aesthetic" Instagram moment is real, but honestly, some of the best Galentine's celebrations happen in sweatpants. It's about the lack of performance. That’s the whole point.

The Evolution: Beyond the "Girls' Club"

While the term originated as a celebration for women, it has evolved significantly. In recent years, we’ve seen "Malentine’s Day" or just "Palentine’s Day" gain traction. The gendered aspect is becoming less important than the sentiment itself.

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It’s about the "Chosen Family."

For many in the LGBTQ+ community, this day has always carried extra weight. When biological family or traditional romantic structures aren't the primary source of support, friends are everything. Asking someone will you be my galentine is a way of acknowledging that chosen kinship. It’s a secular, inclusive way to honor the people who actually show up for you when you’re sick or when your car breaks down at 2 AM.

Hosting a Gathering Without Losing Your Mind

If you're the one organizing, don't overthink it. Leslie Knope made hand-crocheted bouquets and 5,000-word essays for her friends. You are not a fictional character with a writing staff. You are a person with a job.

Keep the food simple. A waffle bar is the classic choice for a reason—it’s cheap, it’s easy, and people can customize their own. If you want to get fancy, do a "board" night. Butter boards were a thing, charcuterie is a classic, but what about a taco board? Or a dessert board?

The activity should be secondary to the conversation. Some people love a "PowerPoint Night" where everyone gives a 5-minute presentation on a niche topic they’re obsessed with. Others just want to sit on a couch and talk about which celebrities are definitely secret vampires.

Why the 13th?

Logistically, celebrating on the 13th is brilliant. It leaves the 14th open for those who have romantic plans, and it serves as a "pre-game" for those who don't. It also means you can usually get a restaurant reservation way easier than you can on Valentine’s Day.

There is also a psychological benefit to putting the friends first. By celebrating your friendships before the romantic holiday, you’re essentially grounding yourself. You’re entering the "day of love" already feeling loved. It takes the sting out of being single, and it takes the pressure off of being in a relationship.

Common Misconceptions About Galentine's Day

People think it's a "single person's holiday." It's not. Some of the biggest proponents of the 13th are people in long-term marriages. They need the break! They need to remember who they are outside of their roles as "wife" or "partner."

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Another myth: It has to be expensive.
False.
Total lie.

The core of the question will you be my galentine is about time. In our current economy, time is the most expensive thing you own. Giving your friends four hours of uninterrupted, no-phones-allowed attention is worth more than a $100 candle or a gold-plated necklace.

Actionable Steps for a Better February 13

If you're feeling the "Galentine's itch," here is how you actually execute it without the stress.

Audit your circle. Who are the 3-5 people who actually checked in on you in the last six months? Those are your Galentines. Don't feel obligated to invite the person from college you haven't spoken to in three years just to fill a table.

Set the tone early. Send the text now. Don't wait until February 12th. People's calendars fill up fast, even on a random weekday.

Pick a "No-Stress" theme. - PJ Party: Literally no one has to get dressed up.

  • Thrift Store Gala: Everyone buys the ugliest $5 outfit they can find and wears it to dinner.
  • Skill Swap: One person teaches everyone how to make a sourdough starter; another teaches how to do a perfect winged eyeliner.

Focus on the "Why." If you're doing cards, write one specific thing you admire about that person. Not "you're nice," but "I love how you always know exactly what to say when I'm spiraling about my boss."

The legacy of the holiday isn't about the brunch or the pink decor. It’s about the fact that we finally gave a name to the love we feel for our friends. So, go ahead and ask. Whether it's through a meme, a phone call, or a fancy invitation—asking will you be my galentine is the easiest way to ensure your February is actually fun.

Plan the date. Order the food. Tell your friends they matter. Everything else is just noise.

Check your calendar for the 13th right now. Reach out to that one friend who has been on your mind. Send a simple message asking them to hang out. It doesn't need to be a grand gesture to be a meaningful one.