Why $uicideboy$ Memoirs of a Gorilla Still Hits Different a Decade Later

Why $uicideboy$ Memoirs of a Gorilla Still Hits Different a Decade Later

If you were anywhere near SoundCloud in 2016, you remember the shift. The underground wasn't just bubbling; it was boiling over. At the center of that heat was a track that felt less like a song and more like a warning shot. When $uicideboy$ dropped "Memoirs of a Gorilla," they weren't just adding another file to the Radical $uicide EP. They were cementing a sonic identity that would eventually move from the murky depths of New Orleans to the main stages of Coachella and Rolling Loud.

It’s loud. It’s abrasive. It’s short.

Honestly, the track is barely two minutes long. Yet, in those 120-ish seconds, Ruby da Cherry and $crim managed to distill the entire essence of the G*59 aesthetic. It’s that raw, lo-fi energy that made "Memoirs of a Gorilla" a staple of every mosh pit since the mid-2010s. You’ve probably seen the concert footage—the beat drops, the crowd splits, and suddenly everyone is screaming about "Ruby leveled up." It’s visceral.

The Production Magic of Budd Dwyer

Let’s talk about the beat. $crim, producing under his Budd Dwyer alias, has a very specific "formula" that isn’t really a formula at all. It’s more of a feeling. The track opens with that haunting, high-pitched synth loop that sounds like it was ripped straight out of a 90s horror movie or a lost Three 6 Mafia tape.

There’s no long intro. No fluff.

The percussion hits almost immediately with that signature heavy 808 distortion. It’s interesting because, compared to modern "trap" production which is often polished to a mirror shine, "Memoirs of a Gorilla" sounds intentionally dusty. It sounds like it was recorded in a bedroom because it basically was. That DIY ethos is exactly why the fans—the "Grey Sheep"—connected with it so deeply. It felt attainable but also untouchable.

Deciphering the Lyrics: Ruby and $crim’s Contrast

The lyrical structure of the song is a masterclass in the duo’s complementary styles. Ruby starts. His flow is chaotic, melodic, and fast. When he says, "Ruby leveled up," he isn't just bragging; he's referencing the constant evolution of his personas. Ruby is known for having dozens of aliases—7th Ward Lord, Oddy Nuff da Snow Leopard, Spooky da Scary. This verse is a frantic sprint through his psyche.

Then comes $crim.

His delivery is the polar opposite. It’s sluggish, deep, and menacing. He slows the pace down, leaning into the "Gorilla" theme with a grit that grounds the track. The transition between Ruby’s high-energy technicality and $crim’s heavy, rhythmic drawl is what gives the song its replay value. You get the best of both worlds in a single, compact burst.

Why the Internet Obsessed Over the "Gorilla"

You can’t talk about "Memoirs of a Gorilla" without acknowledging the memes and the viral nature of the track. Before TikTok was the primary driver of music discovery, there was Vine and the early days of "aesthetic" YouTube. The song’s opening lines became a shorthand for "going hard."

But there’s a deeper layer. The title itself—and the lyrics referencing "gorilla warfare"—taps into a sense of being an underdog. The $uicideboy$ have always marketed themselves as outsiders. Even as they became one of the most-streamed independent acts in the world, they kept that "us against them" mentality. "Memoirs of a Gorilla" is the anthem for that mindset. It’s about being wild, being untamed, and refusing to fit into the industry's box.

Impact on the Radical $uicide EP

The song sits as the second track on the Radical $uicide EP, which was produced entirely by Getter. This is a crucial piece of context. Getter, primarily known in the EDM and dubstep scenes at the time, brought a different kind of "heavy" to the table.

  • The EP peaked at number 17 on the Billboard Rap charts.
  • It served as a bridge between the EDM-trap world and the underground rap scene.
  • It proved that the "Boy$ could collaborate with outside producers without losing their soul.

While other tracks on the EP like "Champion of Death" are equally aggressive, "Memoirs of a Gorilla" remains the standout. It’s the one people request. It’s the one that defines that era of their discography.

The Evolution of the G*59 Sound

Looking back from 2026, it’s easy to see how this song influenced the current landscape of "shadow rap" or "phonk-adjacent" hip hop. You hear echoes of this track in dozens of newer artists who use distorted bass and horror-themed samples.

However, most miss the mark because they lack the sincerity. $crim and Ruby weren't just playing characters; they were processing genuine trauma, addiction, and nihilism. "Memoirs of a Gorilla" might sound like a banger for the club, but the underlying tone is one of defiance in the face of internal darkness. That’s the nuance. That’s why it’s not just a "SoundCloud rap" song. It’s a piece of cultural history for a generation that felt ignored by the mainstream.

Breaking Down the "Ruby Leveled Up" Phenomenon

"Ruby leveled up! Ruby leveled up!"

That line is iconic. In the context of the song, it’s a flex about his growth as an artist and a person. But for fans, it became a mantra. It represents the idea of self-improvement through art. Even if the lyrics are dark, the act of creating the song was an act of survival.

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When you listen to it now, you can hear the hunger in their voices. They weren't rich yet. They weren't playing arenas. They were just two cousins from New Orleans with a laptop and a lot to say. That hunger is impossible to fake.


How to Truly Appreciate the Track Today

To get the full experience of "Memoirs of a Gorilla" in a modern context, you have to look beyond the surface-level aggression.

  1. Listen to the stems: If you can find the instrumental, pay attention to the layering of the high-end synths. It’s more complex than it sounds at first.
  2. Watch the live performances: Look for the 2017-2018 era live videos. The energy is different when you see the physical toll the song takes on the performers.
  3. Contextualize the "Gorilla": Read up on the history of New Orleans bounce and 90s Memphis rap (like DJ Paul and Lord Infamous). You’ll see exactly where the DNA of this song comes from.

The best way to engage with the legacy of $uicideboy$ is to recognize their role as curators of a forgotten sound. They took the bones of the underground past and built a new, terrifying, and beautiful skeleton. "Memoirs of a Gorilla" is the heartbeat of that creation. It’s not just music; it’s a timestamp of a movement that changed the internet forever.

If you’re looking to dive deeper into the G*59 catalog, your next move is to compare this track with their later, more melodic work like "Antarctica" or the "New World Depression" album. You'll see the technical "leveling up" Ruby was talking about in real-time. Trace the production evolution from the raw distortion of the Radical $uicide era to the cleaner, more cinematic arrangements of their recent projects. This progression isn't just about better gear; it's the sonic map of two artists growing up without selling out.