Speed is intoxicating. We’ve been obsessed with it since the first human realized they could outrun a heavy predator, and honestly, that primal itch hasn't gone away; it just transitioned from legs to lithium-ion batteries and rocket fuel. People talk about things that go fast like they’re just numbers on a spec sheet, but it’s more than that. It’s about the sheer audacity of fighting against wind resistance and friction.
When you look at the SR-71 Blackbird, you aren't just looking at a plane. You're looking at a titanium beast that leaked fuel on the tarmac because its skin only sealed up once it got hot enough from air friction at Mach 3. That’s insane. The engineers literally built a "leaky" plane because they knew the heat would expand the metal.
The Absolute Limits of Land Speed
Most people think of a Bugatti Chiron when they think of speed. Sure, 304 mph is blistering for a car you can technically drive to a grocery store, provided the grocery store has a three-mile runway and a team of mechanics. But the real "things that go fast" on land don't have hood ornaments.
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The ThrustSSC still holds the world land speed record. It hit 763 mph back in 1997. It didn't just go fast; it broke the sound barrier on the ground. Think about the physics there for a second. Andy Green, the pilot, wasn't just driving; he was managing a shockwave that wanted to lift the car off the desert floor and turn it into a very expensive lawn dart.
The Bloodhound LSR project tried to push that to 1,000 mph, but money is usually the thing that slows down speed records, not physics. Funding dried up, and the car sits as a reminder that going fast is basically a way to turn massive amounts of cash into noise and heat.
Why the Bugatti Chiron Isn't Actually the Fastest
We need to talk about the Hennessey Venom F5 and the SSC Tuatara. These boutique hypercars are in a constant, somewhat petty war over who wears the crown. Bugatti basically said, "We’re done," after hitting 304 mph, leaving the door open.
The Tuatara allegedly hit 331 mph, but the internet—being the internet—found discrepancies in the video. They eventually redid the run and clocked a verified 282.9 mph. It’s still fast. Like, "blink and you’re in the next zip code" fast. But it shows how hard it is to actually prove speed when you're at the bleeding edge.
Tires are the secret villain here. At 300+ mph, the centrifugal force is trying to rip the rubber off the rim. Michelin had to use technology originally designed for Space Shuttle tires just to keep the Chiron from disintegrating. If the tires fail, you aren't a driver anymore; you're a passenger in a carbon-fiber coffin.
Things That Go Fast in the Ocean
Water is heavy. It's about 800 times denser than air. This makes the quest for speed on water inherently more dangerous than on land or in the sky.
The Spirit of Australia hit 317 mph in 1978. Ken Warby built it in his backyard. Let that sink in. A guy in a backyard built a wooden boat that went faster than a modern Formula 1 car. Since then, almost everyone who has tried to break that record has died.
When a boat hits those speeds, the water acts like concrete. If the nose lifts just a few degrees, the air catches the hull, and the boat flips. It’s called "blowover," and it’s usually fatal. This is why the water speed record hasn't moved much in decades. The risk-to-reward ratio is totally broken.
Space: The Final Speed Frontier
If we’re talking about things that go fast, we have to leave the atmosphere. Down here, we’re fighting air. Up there, the speed is mind-boggling.
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The Parker Solar Probe is currently the fastest human-made object ever. It uses gravity assists from Venus to slingshot itself toward the Sun. It’s currently clocking in at over 394,000 mph. At that speed, you could travel from New York to Tokyo in less than a minute.
How Speed Changes Your Body
High speed itself doesn't hurt. You’re moving at 67,000 mph right now as the Earth orbits the Sun. You feel fine. It’s acceleration—the change in speed—that kills.
- 1-2 Gs: What you feel on a spicy roller coaster.
- 5 Gs: Where most people start to "gray out" because blood is leaving their brain.
- 9 Gs: The limit for F-16 pilots wearing pressurized suits.
- 40+ Gs: The territory of Colonel John Stapp, the "Fastest Man on Earth."
Stapp was a flight surgeon who rode rocket sleds to see what the human body could take. He hit 632 mph and then stopped in 1.4 seconds. He survived, but he broke ribs, lost fillings, and his eyeballs nearly popped out of his skull due to the negative G-force. He did it so pilots could have better seats and harnesses.
The Future of Fast: Electricity and Beyond
Electric cars have changed the "0 to 60" game forever. The Rimac Nevera and the Tesla Model S Plaid have made 2-second sprints feel almost common. Electric motors have 100% of their torque available instantly. There’s no waiting for a turbo to spool up or a transmission to downshift.
But there’s a ceiling.
Battery weight is the enemy of speed. You need more power to move more weight, which requires more batteries, which adds more weight. It’s a vicious cycle. The next leap in things that go fast likely won’t be a better piston engine or a bigger battery; it’ll be materials science. We need lighter frames and better heat dissipation.
Practical Steps for Speed Enthusiasts
If you want to experience things that go fast without dying or going bankrupt, you have a few actual options. Don't go out and try to hit 150 mph on the interstate. That’s just stupid and dangerous for everyone else.
- Find a Local Track Day: Most major circuits have "HPDE" (High-Performance Driving Events). You bring your car, a helmet, and an instructor sits with you to teach you how to actually handle velocity.
- Go Karting (The Real Kind): Not the "birthday party" karts. Find a place with 125cc shifter karts. They sit an inch off the ground and hit 100 mph. It feels faster than a Ferrari.
- Bonneville Salt Flats: If you’re in the US, go to Speed Week. It’s a pilgrimage. You’ll see home-built belly tankers and streamliners trying to eke out an extra 2 mph from a turbocharged hayabusa engine.
- Learn the Physics: Read "The Unfair Advantage" by Mark Donohue. It explains that speed is rarely about bravery and mostly about engineering and finding loopholes in the rules.
Speed isn't just about the machine; it's about the person's ability to stay calm while the world turns into a blur. Whether it's a maglev train in Japan hitting 374 mph or a peregrine falcon diving at 240 mph, speed remains the ultimate test of structural integrity—both for the object and the observer.
The next time you see a list of things that go fast, remember it's not just a contest of horsepower. It's a battle against the very laws of thermodynamics. We’re currently hovering at the limits of what chemical rockets and rubber tires can do. The next chapter involves ion drives and maybe even hyperloop tunnels, provided we can figure out how to keep a vacuum tube from imploding.
Until then, we’ll keep pushing the needle, one mile per hour at a time, just because we want to see what happens when we do. It’s what we’ve always done.