You’re sitting in your car. The engine is off. It’s 6:14 PM on a Tuesday, and you’ve just spent the last nine hours staring at a spreadsheet that, in the grand scheme of the universe, doesn’t actually matter. Your phone buzzes with a notification about a sale on socks. In that specific, quiet moment of suburban purgatory, a thought creeps in like a cold draft under a door: there must be more life than this.
It’s not just a passing whim. It’s a profound, bone-deep realization that the "script" we were sold—the one involving 40-year mortgages, optimized LinkedIn profiles, and "living for the weekend"—feels fundamentally hollow. We’ve reached a point where productivity has replaced presence. Honestly, it’s exhausting.
This feeling isn't a modern invention of the burnt-out millennial. It’s a recurring theme in human history, famously echoed by Freddie Mercury in his 1985 solo track of the same name. Mercury, a man who literally lived at the peak of fame and excess, was still asking the same question. If the guy performing for billions at Live Aid felt the void, what does that say about the rest of us? It suggests that the "more" we are looking for isn't about more things, but a different kind of quality.
The Science of the "Stuck" Feeling
Psychologists often point to the "hedonic treadmill" to explain why we feel like there must be more life than this even when our lives look great on paper. You get the promotion. You buy the house. You finally get that kitchen island with the waterfall edge. And for about three weeks, you’re flying. Then, your baseline shifts. The island is just where you put your mail. The promotion just means more emails.
According to a 2023 study by the Journal of Happiness Studies, the correlation between high income and daily emotional well-being plateaus much earlier than people expect. Once your basic needs and a bit of comfort are met, the "more" doesn't come from your bank account. It comes from what researchers call "eudaimonic well-being"—the sense that your life has actual meaning or purpose beyond survival.
We are biologically wired for novelty and contribution. When our lives become a loop of consumption and routine, our brains literally start to atrophy in terms of dopamine response. You aren't depressed, necessarily. You’re just bored on a cellular level.
The Problem With "Optimization"
Everything is a metric now. We track our steps, our sleep cycles, our caloric intake, and our "output" at work. We’ve turned existing into a management project. This relentless optimization is a primary driver of the feeling that something is missing. When you treat your life like a machine to be tuned, you stop experiencing it as a story to be lived.
Think about the last time you did something truly inefficient. Something that didn't "improve" you. Maybe you spent two hours looking at moss in the woods or sat on a porch without checking your phone once. That's where the "more" lives. It lives in the cracks of the schedule.
The Freddie Mercury Connection: Why the Song Still Resonates
When Freddie Mercury wrote "There Must Be More to Life Than This," he was wrestling with the isolation of global stardom. He later recorded it as a duet with Michael Jackson (though that version wasn't officially released for decades due to, of all things, Jackson’s pet llama causing tension in the studio).
The lyrics aren't about wanting a faster car. They are about a plea for peace and human connection in a world that feels increasingly fragmented and violent. "Why is this world so full of hate? / People dying everywhere / And we destroy what we create."
It’s a global sentiment. We see it in the "Great Resignation" or the "Quiet Quitting" trends. People are looking at the state of the world—the climate, the politics, the endless digital noise—and they are collectively hitting a wall. We are realizing that the "more" isn't a destination. It’s a rebellion against a system that wants us to be quiet, efficient consumers.
Misconceptions About the Mid-Life Crisis
We used to call this a mid-life crisis and joke about 45-year-old men buying red Porsches. That’s a lazy trope. What’s actually happening is an existential recalibration.
- It isn't about regressing to youth.
- It's about shedding the expectations of others.
- It often starts with a "numbness" rather than a "sadness."
- It affects people in their 20s (the "quarter-life crisis") just as much as those in their 50s.
How to Find the "More" Without Quitting Your Job
You don't have to move to a goat farm in Tuscany to fix this. In fact, most people who make "The Big Escape" find that they’re just as miserable in Italy because they brought their same brain with them. The shift is usually smaller and more radical than that.
The concept of "Micro-Sabbaticals"
Instead of waiting for a two-week vacation in August that you’ll spend half of checking Slack, start taking micro-sabbaticals. This means four hours on a Saturday where you are legally dead to the world. No phone. No goals. No "catching up" on errands.
Reclaiming the "Third Space"
Sociologist Ray Oldenburg talked about the "Third Place"—not home, not work, but somewhere like a cafe, a library, or a park where you interact with your community. We’ve lost these. Everything is now digital or transactional. Finding your "more" often involves finding a physical space where you aren't a "user" or an "employee."
The Depth Over Breadth Fallacy
We are taught to want more friends, more followers, and more experiences. But depth provides the satisfaction that breadth can’t touch. Reading one difficult book deeply is better for the soul than skimming ten "productivity" summaries. Having one gut-level conversation with a friend beats a hundred "How’s it going?" texts.
Real Talk: Is it Just Burnout?
Sometimes the feeling that there must be more life than this is actually a physiological red flag. Chronic stress fries your nervous system. When you’re in a state of constant "fight or flight," your brain shuts down the parts responsible for joy and creativity to save energy for survival.
If you’re sleeping eight hours and still waking up tired, or if hobbies you used to love feel like chores, you might be dealing with clinical burnout. In this case, the "more" you need is actually less. Less input, less stimulation, and more actual rest. Not "Netflix rest," which is just passive consumption, but "active rest"—like walking, stretching, or staring at a wall.
Practical Steps to Recalibrate
If you're feeling the weight of the "is this it?" question, start here. Don't do all of them. Just pick the one that makes you feel the most uncomfortable, because that's usually where the growth is hiding.
1. The Analog Hour
For the first hour after you wake up, do not touch a screen. No news, no email, no Instagram. Notice how your brain feels when it isn't immediately bombarded by other people's priorities. It’s usually twitchy at first. That twitchiness is the addiction leaving the building.
2. Audit Your "Shoulds"
Sit down with a piece of paper. Write down everything you do in a week because you feel you should. "I should go to this happy hour." "I should post on LinkedIn." Cross off at least two of them. Watch the world not end.
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3. Seek Out "Awe"
Research from UC Berkeley suggests that "awe"—that feeling of being in the presence of something vast or mysterious—lowers inflammation in the body and increases life satisfaction. You find awe in nature, in complex music, or even in looking at images from the James Webb Space Telescope. It reminds you that you are a tiny part of a massive, beautiful system, which weirdly makes your daily stresses feel much smaller.
4. Change the Narrative of Work
Stop asking people "What do you do?" as the first question when you meet them. It reinforces the idea that our value is tied to our labor. Ask them what they’re obsessed with lately, or what’s the best thing they ate this week. Shift the conversation away from the grind.
5. Embrace "Niksen"
The Dutch have a concept called niksen, which literally means doing nothing. Not meditating. Not "mindfully" breathing. Just sitting. Let your mind wander. It’s in those moments of "nothing" that the "more" often reveals itself. Your brain finally has the space to process all the background noise and give you an actual insight.
The Reality of the Search
There is no "Level 10" where you finally feel 100% fulfilled every second of the day. Life is always going to have laundry, taxes, and traffic jams. But the nagging feeling that there must be more life than this is a gift. It’s your internal compass telling you that you’ve drifted off course. It’s an invitation to stop settling for a life that looks good and start building one that feels good.
The "more" isn't a mystery. It’s the parts of yourself you’ve suppressed to fit into a box. Open the box.
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Actionable Next Steps:
- Audit your digital consumption: Delete one app today that consistently makes you feel "behind" or inadequate.
- Identify your "flow" state: Think back to the last time you lost track of time doing something. Make a plan to do that thing for 30 minutes this week.
- Change your environment: If you work from home, move your desk. If you commute, take a different route. Break the neurological loop of your routine to force your brain back into the present moment.
- Reconnect with a human: Call someone. Don't text. A 10-minute voice conversation provides more emotional resonance than a day of exchanging emojis.
- Schedule "Nothing": Literally block out one hour on your calendar labeled "Nothing" and guard it with your life. No chores allowed. No scrolling. Just exist.