You know that feeling when you walk into a place and just... exhale? That’s the vibe here. Honestly, the Cotswolds can be a bit much sometimes. It’s all tour buses in Bourton-on-the-Water and people fighting over parking spots in Castle Combe. But then you head south. You find Crudwell. It’s a tiny village near Malmesbury that feels like it’s actually lived-in, not just a postcard. At the heart of it sits a big, handsome house of golden stone. The Rectory Hotel Malmesbury isn't trying to be the flashiest stay in England, and that is exactly why it works.
It was built in 1705. Queen Anne was on the throne then. Imagine the conversations those walls have heard. It was originally a home for the rectors of the church across the road, and you can still feel that domestic, slightly eccentric energy. It doesn't feel like a corporate chain. It feels like your very wealthy, very tasteful friend went away for the weekend and left you the keys to their country manor.
What the Rectory Hotel Malmesbury actually gets right
Most "luxury" hotels try way too hard. They give you a pillow menu with eighteen choices and a butler who won't stop hovering. The Rectory is different. It’s confident. The interior design is basically a masterclass in how to mix old and new without looking like a staged furniture showroom. Think original flagstone floors, roaring fires, and mismatched antique chairs paired with bold, modern art and jewel-toned velvets.
The light is the real hero here. Because it was a rectory, the windows are huge. In the afternoon, the sun hits the drawing room at an angle that makes everything look like a Renaissance painting. It’s the kind of place where you actually want to put your phone away and read a book. Or drink gin. Usually both.
There are 18 rooms in total. 15 are in the main house, and 3 are in the separate cottage. Each one is different. Some have massive copper tubs sitting right in the middle of the bedroom. Others have views over the Victorian walled garden. If you’re lucky enough to stay in one of the larger suites, you’ll find high ceilings and enough space to host a small ball. But even the "Little" rooms feel cozy rather than cramped.
The garden and that pool
Let’s talk about the garden for a second. It was designed by Jinny Blom, who is a bit of a legend in the landscape world. She’s worked for Prince Charles (now King Charles III), so she knows her way around a perennial border. It’s not a stiff, formal garden. It’s lush. It’s wavy. It feels like it’s been there forever, even though the redesign was relatively recent.
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And then there’s the pool.
Most English country house hotels have "leisure centers." You know the type—smells like chlorine, indoor, slightly depressing. Not here. The Rectory has an outdoor pool. It’s heated, thank God, because this is still Wiltshire. But swimming outdoors while looking at the spire of All Saints Church is an experience you won't forget quickly. It’s open from May to September, usually. When the sun is out, and the lavender is in bloom, you could easily convince yourself you’re in Provence. Except the tea is better.
Food that actually tastes like food
The dining room is a glass-walled extension that looks out over the gardens. It’s stunning at night when the candles are lit. The menu isn't trying to win a science fair. You won't find foams or "spheres" of beetroot here. Instead, it’s about high-quality local ingredients.
Wiltshire is prime farming country. The chefs here use that. They get meat from local butchers and veg from nearby estates. One night you might have a perfectly seared piece of venison, the next a simple but incredible piece of Cornish hake. It’s refined, but it’s still "pub-adjacent" in its heartiness.
- The breakfast: No sad buffets. It’s all made to order. The kippers are smoky, the eggs are bright orange, and the coffee is strong enough to wake the dead.
- The Potting Shed: This is the sister pub just across the road. If the hotel restaurant feels like a treat, the pub feels like home. It’s won "Pub of the Year" awards multiple times. It has a big garden, great ales, and a Sunday roast that people drive from Bristol for.
The Malmesbury connection
Why stay here instead of deeper in the Cotswolds? Well, Malmesbury itself is fascinating. It’s England’s oldest borough. It’s built on a hill, surrounded by the River Avon. The Abbey is a must-see. It’s a massive, ruined 12th-century structure that still functions as a parish church.
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You’ve also got the Abbey House Gardens, which are famous for their "Naked Gardeners" (though they usually wear clothes during public visiting hours now). It’s a quirky, ancient town that feels much more authentic than the tourist traps further north.
If you're into history, Malmesbury is where Eilmer the Flying Monk lived. In the 11th century, he strapped wings to his hands and feet and jumped off the Abbey tower. He actually flew for about 200 yards before crashing and breaking both his legs. He spent the rest of his life saying he only failed because he forgot to add a tail. That’s the kind of local legend I can get behind.
Why people get it wrong
People often think the Cotswolds starts and ends with Chipping Campden. They miss the southern edge. Because The Rectory Hotel Malmesbury is tucked away in Crudwell, it avoids the "over-tourism" vibe. You can actually get a table. You can walk the footpaths without tripping over someone's tripod.
Some reviews might mention that the service is "relaxed." If you’re looking for white-glove, "yes sir, no sir" formality, you might be disappointed. The staff are young, friendly, and informal. They might be wearing jeans. Personally, I find it refreshing. It’s luxury without the stuffed shirt.
The hotel underwent a massive renovation a few years back under the eye of owner Alex Payne. He’s the guy who also had a hand in the makeover of The Somerset Arms. He clearly understands that modern travelers want style and comfort. You want a socket by the bed for your charger. You want a shower with actual water pressure. You want a bar that stays open late if you’re having a good conversation. The Rectory delivers on all those "small but big" details.
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What to do nearby
Honestly? Do nothing. That’s the point of a place like this.
But if you must be productive:
- Westonbirt Arboretum: It’s about 15 minutes away. If you’re here in autumn, it’s non-negotiable. The maples turn colors that don't look real.
- Highgrove House: The King’s residence is nearby. You have to book garden tours months in advance, but it’s worth the effort for the "Stumpery" alone.
- Tetbury: Just up the road. It’s the antique capital of the area. Even if you aren't buying a £5,000 wardrobe, the window shopping is elite.
Actionable takeaways for your trip
If you're planning a stay, here is the lowdown on how to do it right.
- Book the "Big" or "Very Big" rooms: If you can swing the extra cost, the space and the baths are worth it. Room 2 is a personal favorite for the light.
- Eat at the Potting Shed: Don't eat every meal in the hotel. The pub across the road is a vital part of the experience. Book a table in advance, though; locals fill it up fast on Friday nights.
- Bring walking boots: There are public footpaths that lead straight from the hotel gates out into the Wiltshire countryside. It’s muddy. It’s beautiful.
- Sunday is the sweet spot: The "Sunday Night Stayover" rates are often significantly cheaper than Friday or Saturday. You get the same breakfast and the same cozy fire for a fraction of the price.
- Check the wedding calendar: The Rectory is a popular wedding venue. If you want peace and quiet, call and ask if there’s a private event on during your stay. If the house is "taken over" by a wedding party, the vibe changes completely.
The Rectory Hotel Malmesbury isn't just a place to sleep. It’s a mood. It’s that specific English blend of history, slightly messy gardens, and really good gin. It’s the kind of place that makes you want to sell your house in the city and move to a village where the biggest news is the size of someone's marrow at the local show. Until you realize that's a lot of work, and it's much easier to just book a weekend here instead.
To get the most out of a visit, start by checking their mid-week availability for the "Little" rooms if you’re on a budget, or aim for the garden-facing suites in June to see the Walled Garden at its peak. Avoid peak bank holiday weekends if you want the quietest version of the village. Most importantly, leave your "busy" mindset at the M4 turn-off; this place is designed for slow movements and long dinners.