Recovery isn't a straight line. Honestly, it’s more like a jagged, messy scribble that sometimes loops back on itself just when you think you’ve finally found the exit. If you’ve spent any time in the mental health corner of the internet, you’ve probably seen people whispering about the Get Me Out of Here book by Rachel Reiland. It’s not just some clinical manual. It’s a raw, sometimes terrifyingly honest account of what it actually feels like to live with—and eventually move beyond—Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).
People usually find this book when they’re at the end of their rope. Maybe you’re the one struggling. Or maybe you love someone who seems to push you away the second you get close. Reiland doesn’t sugarcoat the chaos. She describes the "splitting," the rage, and the soul-crushing fear of abandonment in a way that makes you feel seen, even if the reflection in the mirror is a bit uncomfortable to look at.
What Rachel Reiland Actually Gets Right About the Borderline Experience
Most clinical texts talk about BPD like it’s a list of symptoms to be managed. They use words like "affective instability" or "interpersonal dysfunction." But in the Get Me Out of Here book, Reiland translates those sterile terms into real-world pain. She talks about the literal physical sensation of the "void"—that emptiness that makes you want to crawl out of your own skin.
It’s heavy stuff.
She takes us inside her therapy sessions with Dr. Tim Padovano. This isn't a "movie version" of therapy where everything is solved in a neat montage. It’s a grueling, multi-year battle. You see her scream at him. You see her idolize him one minute and dehumanize him the next. This is "splitting" in its most visceral form. For readers who have been accused of being "difficult" or "manipulative," seeing Rachel act out these exact behaviors—and hearing the internal logic behind them—is a massive relief. It’s not that the behavior is okay; it’s that it finally makes sense.
The intensity of the "Borderline Rage"
One thing that sets this memoir apart is how she handles the anger. In many mental health memoirs, authors try to make themselves more likable. Reiland doesn't do that. She shows the moments where she was, frankly, a lot to handle. She describes the destruction of relationships and the way her brain would flip a switch, turning a loved one into a mortal enemy over a perceived slight.
It’s scary. But it’s real.
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The book highlights that BPD isn't a character flaw. It’s a regulatory failure. Imagine being born with third-degree burns over your entire emotional body. Every time someone touches you, even gently, it hurts. That’s the metaphor often used by experts like Marsha Linehan, the creator of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), and Reiland’s narrative supports this 100%.
The Role of Intensive Therapy in Get Me Out of Here
You can’t talk about this book without talking about the work. Rachel underwent intensive psychodynamic therapy. Now, it’s worth noting that today, the "gold standard" for BPD is often considered to be DBT or Mentalization-Based Therapy (MBT). However, Reiland’s journey focuses heavily on the relationship between the patient and the therapist.
This is what clinicians call the "transference."
Basically, Rachel projected all her old wounds from her parents onto her doctor. Every time he was late, or every time he set a boundary, it felt like a life-or-death rejection. The Get Me Out of Here book serves as a case study for why boundaries are the most loving thing a person can provide for someone with BPD, even if the person fights those boundaries tooth and nail at first.
- Consistency: Dr. Padovano didn't leave when she got "bad."
- Boundaries: He didn't let her dictate the terms of the clinical relationship.
- Patience: The recovery took years, not months.
- Accountability: He held a mirror up to her actions without being cruel.
Why Some People Struggle With Reiland’s Narrative
Not everyone loves this book. If you check out reviews on Goodreads or specialized BPD forums, you’ll see some pushback. Some readers find Reiland’s specific family dynamics or her religious leanings a bit hard to relate to. Others feel that the ending feels "too neat" for a disorder that often requires a lifetime of vigilance.
There's also the "quiet BPD" factor.
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Rachel was a "classic" or "acting out" borderline. Her symptoms were loud. She was explosive. But many people with BPD turn that rage inward. They don't scream; they disappear. They don't throw things; they self-harm in secret. For those readers, Reiland’s externalized chaos might feel foreign. But even then, the internal feelings—the shame and the fear—are universal across the BPD spectrum.
Understanding the "Cure" Controversy
Can you actually "recover" from BPD? The Get Me Out of Here book argues that you can. Reiland eventually reached a point where she no longer met the diagnostic criteria for the disorder. In clinical circles, this is called "remission."
Long-term studies, like the McLean Study of Adult Development led by Dr. Mary Zanarini, have actually shown that BPD has a surprisingly good prognosis compared to other mental health conditions. Over a ten-year period, a huge percentage of people (around 86%) stop meeting the full criteria for the disorder. The problem is that while the symptoms go away, the "social functioning"—keeping a job or maintaining a steady marriage—takes much longer to fix. Reiland’s book is a testament to the fact that the work doesn't end when the screaming stops. It ends when the stable life begins.
Key Lessons from Rachel’s Journey
If you're reading the Get Me Out of Here book for help, keep an eye on how she handles setbacks. She slips. She has "episodes" even after months of progress. This is the part that usually gets left out of the TikTok "mental health journey" videos.
Real recovery is boring and frustrating.
It's about choosing to stay in the room when you want to bolt. It's about questioning your own thoughts before you act on them. Rachel eventually learns to "mentalize"—to realize that just because she feels like someone hates her, it doesn't mean they actually do. That gap between feeling and fact is where the healing lives.
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Actionable Steps for Readers and Families
If this book resonated with you, don't just put it back on the shelf and move on. Use it as a catalyst.
- Check the Criteria: If Rachel’s internal monologue sounds like your own, look up the DSM-5 criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder. It's not a death sentence; it's a map for treatment.
- Look Into DBT: While Rachel did psychodynamic work, Dialectical Behavior Therapy is the most researched treatment for BPD today. It teaches skills like mindfulness, distress tolerance, and emotional regulation.
- Set Professional Boundaries: If you're a family member, notice how the doctor in the book handles Rachel’s outbursts. He doesn't take them personally. He stays calm. He maintains his own life. This is essential for preventing burnout.
- Validation without Agreement: Learn the art of validating the feeling without validating the behavior. You can say, "I can see you're feeling incredibly hurt right now," without agreeing that "Yes, I am a monster who is trying to ruin your life."
- Read "I Hate You, Don't Leave Me": If you want a more clinical counterpart to Reiland's personal story, this classic by Jerold Kreisman is a great next step.
The Get Me Out of Here book remains a cornerstone of BPD literature because it refuses to look away. It’s a hard read, honestly. It’s triggering for some and exhausting for others. But for the person sitting in the dark wondering why their brain feels like a war zone, it's a lighthouse. It proves that you can be that "difficult" person, that "hopeless" case, and still come out the other side with a life worth living.
Recovery is possible, but you have to be willing to stay in the room.
Practical Resource Guide:
- National Education Alliance for BPD (NEABPD): Offers free "Family Connections" courses for loved ones.
- BPD World: A community-driven site for peer support.
- Psychology Today Directory: Filter by "DBT" to find therapists who specialize in the exact skills mentioned in Reiland's narrative.
- The TARA 4 BPD: Provides advocacy and education based on the latest neurological research.
Ending the cycle of BPD requires moving from "acting out" to "understanding." Rachel Reiland did it by documenting her own descent and eventual climb. You don't have to write a book to heal, but you do have to start the first chapter. Check your local library or favorite bookstore for a copy, and maybe keep a journal nearby. You’ll probably have a lot to say once you start reading.