If you were around when the first season of Re:Zero -Starting Life in Another World- was airing, you remember the collective trauma of mid-2016. It was a weird time for anime. We were used to the "isekai" power fantasy where the guy gets the girl and the magic sword. Then White Fox dropped Re:Zero episode 14, titled "The Sickness Called Despair," and everything basically broke.
Honestly, it’s the moment the show stopped being a quirky fantasy and turned into a psychological horror show.
Subaru Natsuki isn't a hero in this episode. Not even close. If you’ve rewatched it recently, you’ve probably noticed how uncomfortable it feels compared to the earlier, more whimsical episodes. It’s cringey. It’s painful. It’s visceral. Subaru is loud, entitled, and frankly, kind of a mess. But that’s exactly why the writing by Masahiro Yokotani is so brilliant. It captures a specific type of human breakdown that most shows are too scared to touch.
The Brutal Reality of Subaru’s Meltdown
Most of the discussion around Re:Zero episode 14 focuses on the "From Zero" arc later on, but you can't have the redemption without this absolute floor-level rock bottom. Subaru thinks he's the protagonist. He thinks because he has "Return by Death," he's the director of the world.
He's wrong.
The episode kicks off with the aftermath of his humiliating duel with Julius. If you remember, Subaru got his teeth kicked in—literally. He’s healing in the capital, separated from Emilia, and his ego is hemorrhaging faster than his wounds. He’s obsessed. He thinks he’s the only one who can save her, despite the fact that he has zero political standing and even less combat skill.
This is where the "sickness" in the title comes in. It’s not a physical flu. It’s his delusional hero complex.
Rem is there, of course. She’s trying to be the voice of reason, but Subaru is too far gone. He’s shouting at the walls. He’s desperate to prove his worth to a woman who specifically asked him to stay away for his own safety. It’s a masterclass in writing a character who is doing the "right" thing (trying to protect someone) for all the wrong, selfish reasons.
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That Long, Quiet Walk Toward the Mansion
The second half of the episode is where the atmospheric dread ramps up. We get news that something is wrong at the Roswaal mansion. Rem senses it. Subaru, driven by a mix of fear and a need to be the savior, forces her to take him back.
The journey is agonizingly slow.
White Fox used a lot of wide shots here. You see the carriage moving through these beautiful, sweeping landscapes, but the music is gone or replaced by low, droning synths. It feels like a funeral procession. There’s a specific scene at an inn where Subaru is just staring into space, completely unresponsive. He’s catatonic because the reality of his helplessness is finally setting in.
Then they see it. The dead bodies on the road. The carriage of merchants they had just passed, slaughtered.
The tonal shift is like a physical weight. You go from a petty argument about feelings in the capital to the literal end of the world in the countryside. When Subaru finally reaches the village near the mansion, the imagery is haunting. It’s not just "anime violence." It’s the stillness of the aftermath. The blue tint of the night, the snow (which we later learn is a very bad sign), and the silence.
Why the Witch Cult Changed Everything
Before Re:Zero episode 14, the threats were somewhat manageable. An assassin in a basement? Scary, but Subaru handled it. A giant dog monster? Tough, but they won.
The Witch Cult is different.
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They don't have a "villain speech" logic. They are just a force of nature. This episode introduces the absolute depravity of Petelgeuse Romanee-Conti’s influence, even if we don't see the man himself in full glory until the very end and into episode 15. The episode ends on a cliffhanger that left the internet in shambles back in the day. Subaru enters the mansion, walks through the blood-stained hallways, and finds... well, you know.
The discovery of Rem’s body—and then the reveal of what happened to the children in the village—was a turning point for the "isekai" genre. It stripped away the safety net.
The Animation and Sound Design Choices
Let's talk about the technical side for a second because it’s why this episode sticks in your brain. The voice acting by Yusuke Kobayashi (Subaru) is genuinely exhausting to listen to. He’s not doing the "cool anime protagonist" voice. He’s cracking. He’s shrieking. He sounds like a teenager having a literal nervous breakdown.
The lack of an opening or ending theme in the traditional sense for these heavy episodes is a classic Re:Zero move. It denies the viewer that moment of "it’s just a show" relief. When the credits roll over the final, horrifying shot of Subaru’s broken psyche, you’re just left sitting in the dark.
Kenichiro Suehiro’s score deserves a shout-out too. He uses dissonant strings that make your skin crawl. It’s not heroic music. It’s the sound of a mind fracturing.
Common Misconceptions About Episode 14
People often argue that Subaru is "too annoying" in this part of the story.
"Why can't he just be cool?"
"Why is he shouting at Emilia?"
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That’s the point. You aren't supposed to like him here. If you liked him, the show would be failing. He’s a shut-in who was suddenly given the power to "restart" and he let it go to his head. Episode 14 is the universe (and the author, Tappei Nagatsuki) slapping him back into reality.
Another misconception is that the violence is just for shock value. If you look at the light novels, this episode is actually toned down. The goal isn't just to show blood; it's to show the consequences of Subaru’s inaction and his arrogance. He spent days moping in the capital when he could have been preparing or listening to Rem.
The Lasting Legacy of the "Sickness"
Looking back from 2026, Re:Zero episode 14 remains a benchmark for how to handle a mid-season climax. It’s the episode that separates the casual viewers from the people who actually want to see a character study. It forced the audience to reckon with the idea that being "special" (having a unique power) doesn't make you a good person.
It also set the stage for the legendary episode 15, which many consider the best single episode of television in anime history. But episode 15 doesn't work without the slow, grinding misery of 14.
What You Should Do Next
If you’re revisiting the series or watching for the first time, don’t skip the "Director’s Cut" versions of these episodes. They add small bits of context and slightly improved pacing that make the dread feel even more suffocating.
- Pay attention to the background characters: In episode 14, the way the commoners and knights look at Subaru tells you more about his "hero" status than his internal monologue does.
- Listen to the silence: The most important moments in this episode happen when no one is talking.
- Compare Subaru here to Season 2/3: If you want to see how much a character can actually grow, look at the trembling mess in the carriage and then look at the Subaru of the later arcs.
The "Sickness Called Despair" is a hard watch, but it’s the most honest the show ever gets. It reminds us that even in a world with magic and maids, your biggest enemy is usually your own ego.
To truly understand the impact, watch episode 14 and 15 back-to-back without any distractions. Turn off your phone. Dim the lights. Let the atmosphere do its job. You’ll see exactly why this remains a foundational piece of modern dark fantasy.
Check out the official Re:Zero light novels if you want the internal monologues that the anime had to cut for time; they make Subaru's mental state even clearer. You can also find the soundtrack on most streaming platforms to experience Suehiro’s haunting compositions on their own.