It is a park bench in the middle of July. The air is thick. The kind of Oklahoma heat that makes your skin feel a size too small. Reba McEntire sits there, watching children play, but the conversation happening on that bench isn't about the weather or the kids. It is about betrayal. Or at least, the shadow of it. When we talk about Reba McEntire Only in My Mind, we aren't just talking about another track on a Greatest Hits record. We are talking about the moment the "Queen of Country" proved she could out-write the Nashville machine.
Most people forget that Reba actually wrote this one herself. Solely. No co-writers. No room full of professional "song doctors" tweaking the hook. In 1985, that was a big deal. Usually, the labels handed stars a stack of demos and said, "Pick ten." Reba had other plans. She had a story about a woman being asked the most terrifying question in a marriage: "Have you ever cheated on me?"
The answer she gives is legendary. "Only in my mind."
The Raw Truth Behind Reba McEntire Only in My Mind
If you look at the charts from September 1985, country music was in a weird spot. It was trying to find its soul again after the "Urban Cowboy" phase. Reba was leading the charge back to the traditional stuff—fiddles, steel guitar, and real-life heartache. Reba McEntire Only in My Mind was the second single from her ninth studio album, Have I Got a Deal for You.
It hit number five on the Billboard Hot Country Singles chart. Not bad for a song that basically admits to emotional infidelity.
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What makes the song haunt you is the perspective. It’s a three-way conversation between the narrator, her husband, and the "friend" she’s actually in love with. She’s sitting there blushing. Is it the heat? Or is it the fact that she’s looking at her husband but thinking about someone else? That kind of honesty is uncomfortable. It’s also why the song worked.
Why the Writing Matters
Honestly, Nashville was a boys' club in the 80s. Still is, in some ways. For a female artist to demand that her own self-penned song be a single was a power move. Jimmy Bowen, who produced the track, knew Reba had an ear for what her fans—mostly hardworking women—actually felt.
- Self-penned: It remains one of the few hits Reba wrote entirely alone.
- The Brother Factor: Her brother, Pake McEntire, actually sang background vocals on it.
- The Stakes: If it had flopped, the label might have stopped letting her write. It didn't.
The lyrics don't offer a clean resolution. She doesn't leave her husband. She doesn't run off with the "friend." She just sits on that bench and carries the weight of a secret. "How can I tell him / The time we spent together / Was time between friends." That’s a gut punch. You’ve probably felt that—the "what if" that stays tucked in the back of your brain while you're doing the dishes or driving to work.
Breaking Down the "Only in My Mind" Production
Technically, the song is a masterclass in restraint. It doesn't need a big, flashy chorus. It relies on Reba's vocal trills—that signature Oklahoma "bent" note. Ron Treat and Chuck Ainlay were the engineers on the session, and they kept the sound crisp but intimate. You can almost hear the humidity in the room.
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The song was recorded at a time when Reba was finally getting the respect she deserved. She had just won her first CMA Female Vocalist of the Year award in 1984. She was about to win it again in '85, '86, and '87. Reba McEntire Only in My Mind was a huge part of that momentum. It proved she wasn't just a singer; she was a storyteller.
People often confuse this song with "Whoever's in New England" because they both deal with the "other" person. But where "New England" is about a wife waiting for a cheating husband, "Only in My Mind" flips the script. It’s the woman who is wandering, even if her feet never leave the house.
What Most People Get Wrong About the Lyrics
There’s a common misconception that the song is about a physical affair. It isn't. That’s the whole point of the title. It’s about the infidelity of the heart.
The narrator asks her husband, "Have you ever cheated on me?" after she admits she has "only in her mind." It’s a desperate attempt to level the playing field. She wants to know if he’s as haunted as she is. It’s sort of dark, if you think about it. Two people sitting on a bench, both wondering if the person next to them is actually there.
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How to Experience the Song Today
If you really want to "get" Reba McEntire Only in My Mind, don't just stream it on a tinny phone speaker.
- Find the 1985 Vinyl: The original MCA pressing has a warmth that digital files lose.
- Watch the Live Performances: Reba used to perform this with just a piano or a light band. Her facial expressions tell the story better than the lyrics ever could.
- Listen for the Background Vocals: Pake McEntire’s harmonies are subtle, but they add that "family" sound that defined Reba's early MCA years.
Actionable Insights for Reba Fans
If you're building a "Classic Reba" playlist, you have to pair this with "Whoever's in New England" and "The Heart is a Lonely Hunter." These songs form a loose trilogy of 80s and 90s domestic drama. They are the "Pre-Fancy" era where Reba was establishing herself as the voice of the American woman.
Don't just listen for the melody. Pay attention to the silence between the lines. That is where the real story lives. Reba McEntire knew that sometimes, what we don't say is way more dangerous than what we do.
The next time you’re sitting on a park bench in July, put this track on. See if the air feels a little heavier. It probably will. That’s the power of a song written from the soul of a woman who wasn't afraid to admit she wasn't perfect.
Explore the rest of the Have I Got a Deal for You album to see how Reba was experimenting with her sound before she became a global superstar. You'll find a lot of traditional fiddle and steel guitar that paved the way for the "New Traditionalist" movement in country music.