Why "if i don't steal it someone else will" is a Dangerous Myth

Why "if i don't steal it someone else will" is a Dangerous Myth

You've heard it before. Maybe it was in a crowded bar during a debate about downloading a movie, or perhaps it was whispered in a corporate boardroom regarding a competitor's trade secrets. The phrase "if i don't steal it someone else will" is the ultimate moral safety net. It’s a way to feel better about doing something we know is probably wrong by suggesting that the outcome—the theft—is inevitable anyway.

It feels logical, right? If a resource is sitting there, unprotected, and the "market" of human greed is active, someone is going to take it. But honestly, this line of thinking is a psychological trap. It’s a logical fallacy known as the preemptive strike justification, and it has been used to justify everything from petty shoplifting to massive environmental exploitation and corporate espionage.

Let's get real for a second.

The Psychology of the Preemptive Theft

When people say "if i don't steal it someone else will," they aren't usually talking about survival. They aren't Jean Valjean stealing a loaf of bread to feed a starving family. Usually, it's about a perceived advantage. The human brain is remarkably good at something called moral decoupling. This is where we separate the act of stealing from our identity as a "good person." By framing the theft as an inevitability, we stop being the "thief" and start being the "pragmatist."

Dr. Dan Ariely, a renowned behavioral economist and author of The (Honest) Truth About Dishonesty, has spent years researching why we lie and cheat. His findings suggest that most of us don't actually weigh the cost-benefit of a crime like a computer. Instead, we want to look in the mirror and feel good about ourselves.

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We cheat just enough to get the benefit, but not so much that it changes our self-image. Saying "someone else will take it" is the perfect grease for that sliding scale. It removes the agency from the individual. You're just a cog in a machine of inevitable outcomes.

But it’s a lie.

If you don't take it, there is a non-zero chance that nobody takes it. Or, perhaps more importantly, the person who eventually takes it has to deal with their own conscience, but you don't have to carry that weight.

The Tragedy of the Commons and Marketplace Ethics

In economics, this often bleeds into the "Tragedy of the Commons." This theory, popularized by Garrett Hardin in 1968, explains how individuals acting in their own self-interest can end up destroying a shared resource.

Imagine a shared pasture. Every herder thinks, "If I don't let my extra cow graze here, someone else will just bring their cow, and the grass will be gone anyway. I might as well get my cow fed." Eventually, the grass is gone, the cows die, and everyone loses.

This isn't just about cows. It’s about how we treat digital intellectual property, how companies handle data privacy, and even how we act in video games.

Take the world of gaming, specifically "looting" or "griefing." In high-stakes games like Rust or EVE Online, the mantra of "if i don't steal it someone else will" is basically the law of the land. Players justify raiding a beginner’s base by claiming that if they don’t take those resources, a larger, meaner clan will do it five minutes later.

Does it make it right? Within the rules of the game, sure. But when that mentality shifts into the real world—into business or personal relationships—it creates a "race to the bottom."

Why This Logic Fails in the Modern World

We live in an era of radical transparency. Whether it's blockchain ledgers or digital footprints, "stealing it first" is becoming harder to hide.

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In the corporate world, the "if i don't steal it" mindset often leads to massive litigation. Think about the famous Waymo v. Uber case. Anthony Levandowski didn't just wake up and decide to ruin his career; he likely believed that the autonomous vehicle secrets he held were going to be "acquired" or developed by someone else anyway, so why shouldn't he be the one to profit?

The result? A prison sentence (later pardoned) and a $179 million judgment.

The "someone else will" defense never holds up in court. Judges don't care about the hypothetical person who might have committed the crime. They care about the person who actually did.

The Social Cost of Low Trust

Societies thrive on High Trust. In places like Scandinavia, where trust in strangers is high, the economy functions more efficiently because there is less "friction." You don't need a thousand-page contract for every transaction.

When we adopt the "steal it first" mentality, we are actively contributing to a Low Trust society. We are saying that we assume everyone else is a thief. And when you assume everyone is a thief, you start acting like one. Then, predictably, everyone else sees you acting like a thief and decides they need to "steal it first" to keep up with you.

It's a self-fulfilling prophecy of garbage behavior.

Breaking the Cycle: What You Should Actually Do

So, you’re in a situation where a "free" or "unprotected" opportunity is staring you in the face. It could be a piece of code you found that isn't yours, a physical item left behind, or a business lead you aren't supposed to have.

How do you fight the urge to justify taking it?

  1. The "Front Page" Test. If your action—and your justification ("I did it because someone else would")—was printed on the front page of a newspaper, would you feel like a smart businessman or a common thief?
  2. Audit the "Inevitable." Ask yourself: Is it actually inevitable that this will be stolen? Often, we use this excuse to bypass looking for a rightful owner or a legal path.
  3. Consider the Long-Term Reputation. In 2026, your reputation is your most valuable currency. People want to work with "high-integrity" individuals because they are rare. Being the person who didn't take the easy, dirty win builds a brand that pays dividends for decades.

Practical Steps for High-Integrity Living

If you find yourself constantly tempted by this mindset, it’s time to recalibrate.

Start by practicing "Small Integrity." If a cashier gives you too much change, give it back. Not because the store will go bankrupt, but because you are training your brain to reject the "free money" signal.

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In business, if you find a vulnerability in a competitor, instead of exploiting it, focus on making your own product better. Innovation is a sustainable growth strategy; theft is a one-time sugar high followed by a crash.

Ultimately, the phrase "if i don't steal it someone else will" is a confession. It's a confession that you've given up on your own agency. It's an admission that you are controlled by the potential bad actions of others.

Don't let hypothetical thieves dictate who you are.

Final Insight: The Power of the "No"

There is a profound power in being the person who walks away. When you refuse to participate in a "race to the bottom," you set a new floor for everyone around you. You might lose the short-term gain. You might see someone else eventually take that "thing." But you keep the one thing that is impossible to steal back once it's gone: your integrity.

Stop looking at what "someone else" might do. Start looking at what you are doing right now. The world doesn't need more people who are "just as bad as the next guy." It needs people who are better.


Next Steps for Implementation:

  • Audit your current justifications. Write down three times you've used the "someone else will" logic this month.
  • Evaluate the risk. Research the legal and reputational fallout of "preemptive" actions in your specific industry (e.g., copyright law or non-compete clauses).
  • Set a personal 'Hard Line'. Define exactly what you will never do, regardless of whether a competitor is doing it or not.