Why fun games to play over text are the only way I stay sane in long distance friendships

Why fun games to play over text are the only way I stay sane in long distance friendships

Phones are basically glued to our hands. Yet, most of our digital interactions are boring. We send "how was your day" texts and get "good, u?" back. It’s a cycle of mediocrity. Honestly, it’s exhausting. We have these incredible pocket supercomputers and all we do is exchange dry pleasantries like we’re stuck in a 19th-century parlor room. But if you actually use your data plan for fun games to play over text, the dynamic shifts. It stops being a chore. It becomes a playground.

I’ve spent years testing these out. Some are total duds. Ever tried playing Chess via text without a dedicated app? It’s a nightmare of "Wait, was my Knight on B3 or C4?" You don't want that. You want games that flow. You want stuff that fits into the "in-between" moments of life—waiting for the bus, sitting in a boring meeting, or lying in bed when you can't sleep.

The psychological hook of text-based play

Why do we even care? Psychologists often talk about "micro-interactions." These are small, positive moments that build social capital. According to research on digital communication patterns, gamifying a conversation lowers the barrier to entry for deeper connection. It removes the pressure of "having something to say." You aren't talking about your taxes or your boss; you're arguing over whether a hot dog is a sandwich. That’s where the magic happens.

20 Questions: The undisputed heavyweight champion

Let’s start with a classic. You know it. I know it. But most people play it wrong. They pick something impossible like "the third molecule from the left on a specific leaf in the Amazon." Don't be that person. To make 20 Questions actually work as one of the best fun games to play over text, you need boundaries.

Pick a category first. Is it a celebrity? A kitchen appliance? A fictional character?

Once you have the category, the guessing begins. The beauty here is the asynchronous nature. You send a question. They reply ten minutes later. It stretches the anticipation. It’s not about the "win" really. It’s about the narrow-down. "Is it alive?" "No." "Is it bigger than a breadbox?" (Why do we always use breadboxes as a reference? Nobody owns a breadbox anymore.)

Truth or Dare (The Digital Remix)

Truth or Dare over text is inherently different from the middle school basement version. It’s more curated. You have time to think.

The Truths: These get deep. Since you’re typing, people often feel a "disinhibition effect." This is a real psychological phenomenon where the lack of face-to-face contact makes people more honest. You might actually learn something real about your friend.

The Dares: These are tricky. You can’t exactly dare someone to eat a spoonful of cinnamon if you aren't there to see it. Digital dares require proof. "I dare you to text your mom a weird photo with no context and screenshot the reply." Or, "I dare you to go outside and take a selfie with a tree." It’s visual. It’s interactive.

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Would You Rather: The debate starter

This is the ultimate low-effort, high-reward game. You just need a prompt.

  • Would you rather always have to hop like a kangaroo everywhere you go or always have to talk like a pirate?
  • Would you rather only be able to eat food that is the color blue or food that is the color clear?

The fun isn't in the choice. It’s in the defense. You have to explain why the kangaroo hop is superior. It reveals how your friend’s brain works. Are they practical? Are they chaotic? It’s a litmus test for personality disguised as a silly hypothetical.

Emoji Pictionary and the art of digital hieroglyphics

We’ve basically regressed to ancient Egyptian communication, and I’m here for it. Emoji Pictionary is one of those fun games to play over text that actually tests your creativity. You try to describe a movie, a song, or a phrase using only the emoji keyboard.

Think about it. 🚢🧊🥶. That’s Titanic. Easy.
But what about 👨‍🍳🐀🍝? Ratatouille.
It gets harder when you try to do song titles. 👁️🐯. Eye of the Tiger.

The trick is to not look up the answers online. Use your brain. There’s a specific kind of dopamine hit when you finally crack a code that’s been sitting in your inbox for three hours.

The "Story Build" method

This one is for the writers or the people who just like a bit of chaos. You start a story with one sentence. Your friend adds the next.

"Once upon a time, a squirrel named Gary found a discarded iPhone."
"Gary realized he could use the phone to order unlimited acorns on DoorDash."
"But then the delivery driver turned out to be a hawk."

It’s improvisational. It’s collaborative. You never know where it’s going. Sometimes it turns into a thriller; sometimes it’s a weird romance. The only rule is you can’t backtrack. You have to accept the "canon" of the previous text.

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Word Association: The rapid fire

This is the fastest game on the list. I send a word. You send the first word that pops into your head.

  • Pizza.
  • Pepperoni.
  • Spicy.
  • Fire.
  • Truck.
  • Red.

You keep going until someone repeats a word or takes too long to reply. It’s a great way to kill five minutes while you’re both staring at your phones anyway.

Trivia: Beyond the pub

You don't need a host with a microphone and a clipboard to play trivia. You just need Google and a bit of integrity. No cheating!

You can pick a niche. Maybe you’re both obsessed with 90s sitcoms or Marvel movies. You take turns asking questions. "Who played the original Aunt Viv in Fresh Prince?"

If you want to get serious, there are actually apps like QuizUp (though it's gone through many iterations and clones) that facilitate this, but doing it manually in the text thread feels more personal. It’s about the banter.

Why most text games fail (and how to fix it)

Most people give up on fun games to play over text because the momentum dies. Someone forgets to reply. Or the game is too complex.

  1. Keep it simple. If you have to explain the rules for more than 30 seconds, it’s a bad text game.
  2. No pressure. Acknowledge that life happens. If a game of 20 Questions takes three days, that’s fine. It’s a slow-burn engagement.
  3. Know your audience. Don't try to play a high-effort story-building game with your friend who only replies with "lol" and "k." Pick the game that matches their energy level.

The "In-Character" Texting Challenge

This is a bit more "out there," but it’s a blast if you’re into roleplay or acting. You both decide to text as specific people for an hour. Maybe you’re two Victorian explorers discovering a Starbucks for the first time.

"Dearest Arthur, this 'Venti Latte' is a most curious concoction. The locals seem to worship a green mermaid."
"My word, Percival! Does the mermaid speak? I find the steamed bean water quite invigorating for the humors."

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It’s ridiculous. It’s embarrassing. But it’s also one of the most memorable ways to use your phone. It breaks the "standard" way we communicate.

Personalizing the experience

The best games are the ones you invent. Maybe it’s a game where you send photos of weird things you see in public and the other person has to guess where you are. Or a game where you try to predict what the person in front of you in the grocery store line is going to buy based on their outfit.

The goal isn't to follow a rulebook. The goal is to bridge the gap between two screens.

Actionable next steps for your next conversation

Stop sending "What's up?" It's a dead-end question. Instead, try these specific moves to kickstart a game:

  • The Direct Open: Send an emoji string (like 🎥🤠🐍💎) and say "Guess the movie. No hints." (It's Raiders of the Lost Ark, by the way).
  • The Hypothetical: Send a "Would you rather" that is specific to your shared history or inside jokes.
  • The Challenge: Send a "Truth or Dare" prompt immediately. "Truth or dare? No backing out."

Texting doesn't have to be a utility. It can be a hobby. When you lean into these fun games to play over text, you’re not just killing time. You’re actually strengthening the neural pathways of your friendship. You’re creating shared "lore."

Next time you find yourself scrolling through TikTok because you’re bored, close the app. Open your messages. Start a game. It’s way more rewarding than watching a stranger dance to a sped-up pop song.

Pick one person right now. Send them "Would you rather have a permanent un-scratchable itch on your back or always feel like there's a pebble in your shoe?" See where it goes. The conversation will almost certainly be better than a "how are you."