Honestly, it is kinda wild to see where the public stands on Ariana Grande right now. One minute she’s the "ponytail princess" helping a grieving Manchester heal, and the next, she’s the internet's favorite villain. If you’ve been on TikTok or Reddit lately, you’ve probably seen the comments. People aren't just critiquing her music anymore; they are dissecting her entire existence.
Why do people hate Ariana Grande? It’s not just one thing. It’s a messy, decades-long pileup of donut-licking, voice-switching, and relationship drama that reached a boiling point with her role in Wicked.
The Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay Situation
The biggest reason for the current wave of "Ariana hate" is, without a doubt, the timeline of her relationship with Wicked co-star Ethan Slater.
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In mid-2023, news broke that Ariana and her husband, Dalton Gomez, were splitting. Almost immediately after, reports surfaced that she was dating Ethan Slater. The problem? Ethan was married to his high school sweetheart, Lilly Jay, and they had a literal newborn baby.
Lilly Jay eventually told Page Six that Ariana is "not a girl’s girl" and that her family was just "collateral damage." That quote went nuclear. Even if the "official" word is that both were separated before they started dating, the optics were—to put it mildly—terrible. People felt for Lilly. They saw a woman with a new baby being left for a pop star, and they didn't like the "Yes, And?" attitude Ariana took in her lyrics afterward.
The Race-Shifting and "Blackfishing" Accusations
Long before the marriage drama, there was the "Blackfishing" conversation.
If you look at Ariana during her Victorious days, she’s a pale, red-headed girl from Florida. Fast forward to the 7 Rings era, and she was sporting a tan so deep and an accent so heavy that many people actually thought she was a person of color.
Critics argue she used Black aesthetics—AAVE (African American Vernacular English), trap beats, and specific fashion—to build her "cool girl" image. Then, as soon as the cultural tide shifted, she "shed" that skin. Nowadays, her look is much more "demure" and "Old Hollywood," often compared to Audrey Hepburn. For many, this feels like a costume. It makes people feel like she’s a "chameleon" who adopts cultures when they’re profitable and drops them when they aren't.
The Personality and "Diva" Rumors
The "diva" tag has followed her since 2013. Sometimes it’s just gossip, but other times, it comes from high-profile sources.
Take the recent drama with Elvira (Cassandra Peterson). In 2024, the horror icon shared that Ariana was one of the rudest celebrities she’d ever met, alleging that Ariana snubbed her at a show and refused to take photos. Ariana apologized, citing a past anxiety attack, but Elvira wasn't really buying it, saying she hoped Ariana would learn "humility."
Then there’s "Donut-gate." We can't talk about why people dislike her without mentioning the 2015 video of her licking unpurchased donuts in a shop and saying, "I hate America." Even though it was years ago, it established a narrative that she was entitled and "bratty" that she’s never quite been able to shake.
The "Voice Switching" Confusion
Lately, people have been weirded out by her voice.
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During the Wicked press tour in 2024 and 2025, her speaking voice became significantly higher and more "transatlantic." She explained it as "muscle memory" from playing Glinda for two years.
Fans on Reddit have been less sympathetic. They’ve pointed out that she’s had about five different "real" voices over the last decade. One year she sounds like she’s from the Bronx; the next, she’s a breathy Broadway star. To some, this feels like a lack of authentic identity. When someone changes their personality and voice every time they have a new project or boyfriend, it makes the public feel like they’re being "sold" a character rather than seeing a real person.
The "Eternal Sunshine" Lyrical Defiance
When she released Eternal Sunshine in 2024, many expected a humble explanation. Instead, they got "Yes, And?"
The song basically told the public to mind their own business regarding "whose dick [she] rides." While some fans loved the "boss" energy, a lot of casual listeners found it tone-deaf. If the rumors about the Ethan Slater situation were even partially true, people felt that telling the public to "shut up" was the wrong move.
Why the Hate Still Sticks
- Lack of Accountability: She often apologizes by saying she was "in a bad place" or "anxious," which some feel avoids the actual issue.
- The "Home-Wrecker" Label: Regardless of the truth, the "not a girl's girl" label is incredibly hard to scrub off in the social media age.
- Overexposure: Being everywhere (Wicked, REM Beauty, New Music) makes people more likely to pick apart every flaw.
What can we learn from the Ariana Grande backlash? If you're trying to understand the divide, look at how she handles her public image versus her private actions. For most critics, the "hate" isn't about her talent—everyone knows she can sing. It’s about a perceived lack of sincerity.
Your Next Steps for Understanding the Narrative:
- Watch the "Donut-gate" CCTV footage: See for yourself where the original "brat" narrative started.
- Compare 2019 vs. 2024 Interviews: Listen to the change in her speaking voice and decide if you think it's "character work" or something else.
- Read Lilly Jay’s full statement: It gives a much-needed perspective on the human cost behind the tabloid headlines.
Ultimately, the internet's relationship with Ariana is a cycle. We love to build her up, and then we love to tear her down when the image feels too manufactured. Whether she can win back the general public depends on if she chooses to be "Glinda" or "Ariana" in the years to follow.