Puritan life was brutal. Most people picture it as a grayscale montage of itchy wool, strict church pews, and people getting shamed in the town square for enjoying a beer. But then you read To My Dear and Loving Husband by Anne Bradstreet. It completely breaks the stereotype. Honestly, it’s one of the most intense, unapologetic expressions of romantic obsession ever written in the English language.
Bradstreet wasn't just some hobbyist. She was the first published poet in the American colonies. That’s a huge deal. Imagine living in a wilderness where you’re basically fighting for survival every day, yet you find the mental space to craft intricate, passionate verses about how much you want to be with your husband forever. It’s wild.
The Woman Behind the Poem
Anne arrived in Massachusetts in 1630. She was part of the Winthrop Fleet. She was young, well-educated, and probably absolutely terrified of the New World. Her father and husband were both heavy hitters in the Massachusetts Bay Colony—both served as governors. You’d think she’d be the ultimate "good Puritan wife" who kept her head down and only wrote about God.
She did write about God. A lot. But her personal poems, the ones she didn’t necessarily intend to publish globally, reveal a woman who was deeply, earthly, and physically in love with Simon Bradstreet.
When her brother-in-law took her manuscript to England and published it as The Tenth Muse Lately Sprung Up in America in 1650, it changed everything. People in London were shocked. They didn't think anyone in the "wilds" of America could produce something so sophisticated. But the specific poem To My Dear and Loving Husband wasn't in that first book. It showed up later, in a posthumous 1678 edition. It’s more private. It’s more raw.
Decoding the Passion in To My Dear and Loving Husband
The poem starts with a challenge. "If ever two were one, then surely we." It’s a direct reference to the biblical idea of marriage making two people "one flesh," but she takes it further. She asks other women to compare their lives to hers. She’s basically bragging. She’s saying, "My marriage is better than yours." It’s bold.
Why the Gold and Riches Matter
Bradstreet uses imagery of wealth that would have been very familiar to a 17th-century audience. She writes:
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I prize thy love more than whole mines of gold,
Or all the riches that the East doth hold.
This isn't just a cliché. In the 1600s, "the East" (the Orient) was the ultimate symbol of unattainable wealth—spices, silks, jewels. By saying her husband's love is better than all of that, she’s placing a massive value on emotional connection over material survival. For a woman living in a colony where "material survival" was a daily struggle, this is a radical statement of priority.
The Problem of "Repaying" Love
One of the weirdest and most beautiful parts of the poem is where she talks about how she can't pay him back.
"My love is such that rivers cannot quench, / Nor ought but love from thee give recompense."
She’s describing love as a debt that can never be settled. It’s an infinite loop. This contradicts the typical Puritan view that everything should be balanced and moderated. Bradstreet isn't being moderate here. She’s being excessive. She’s drowning in it.
The Theological Tension
Puritans were supposed to love God first. Everything else—husbands, children, homes—was secondary. There was always this underlying fear that if you loved your spouse too much, you were committing idolatry. You were putting a human on the throne meant for the Creator.
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Anne Bradstreet wrestled with this constantly. In other poems, like the one about her house burning down, she scolds herself for caring too much about her earthly possessions. But in To My Dear and Loving Husband, she finds a clever theological loophole.
She ends the poem with: "Then while we live, in love let’s so persevere, / That when we live no more, we may live ever."
This is a brilliant move. She’s essentially saying that their earthly love is so strong, it will actually help them get to heaven. She’s sanctifying her romantic passion. She’s arguing that by loving Simon perfectly on earth, they are practicing for the eternal love of the afterlife. It’s a sophisticated way to justify her intense feelings within a rigid religious framework.
Why We Still Care in 2026
You’d think a 12-line poem from the 1600s would be irrelevant now. It’s not.
Most modern love songs are about the start of a relationship—the butterflies, the chase, the breakup. Bradstreet is writing about the middle. She’s writing about a long-term, gritty, established marriage. She and Simon had eight children. They dealt with sickness, political turmoil, and the constant threat of fire and famine.
Staying that "in love" through decades of actual hardship is much more impressive than a summer fling. That’s why the poem resonates. It’s the "relationship goals" of the 17th century.
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Common Misconceptions
People often think Bradstreet was oppressed or miserable because she was a Puritan woman. While her life was definitely restricted by modern standards, her writing shows a woman of immense intellectual power and emotional agency. She wasn't writing despite her husband; she was writing to him, and he supported her.
Another mistake is thinking the poem is just "cute" or "sweet." It’s actually quite competitive. She uses words like "quench," "recompense," and "repay." It’s the language of commerce and thirst. It’s an active, demanding kind of love.
How to Read Bradstreet Like an Expert
If you really want to understand the depth of her work, you have to look at the structure.
The poem is written in heroic couplets. That means every two lines rhyme and they follow a specific rhythm called iambic pentameter.
- The rhyme scheme is simple (AABBCC...).
- The rhythm mimics a heartbeat.
- The brevity is intentional. It’s a "plain style" poem, which was a Puritan aesthetic.
By keeping the form simple, the emotion stands out more. If she had used flowery, over-the-top metaphors, it would have felt fake. The simplicity makes it feel honest.
Actionable Ways to Appreciate the Text
To truly get what Bradstreet was doing, you need to look past the "thee" and "thou" and see the human.
- Read it aloud: The iambic pentameter is meant to be heard. You’ll notice the emphasis on the "oneness" in the first line.
- Compare it to "Upon the Burning of Our House": Read these two together. You’ll see the tension between her love for the world and her love for God. It makes her a much more complex figure.
- Look at the historical context: Research the 1666 London fire or the struggles of the Massachusetts Bay Colony in the 1640s. It puts the "whole mines of gold" line into perspective. Gold was a dream; survival was the reality.
- Journal on the "Oneness" concept: Bradstreet posits that two people can become one entity. Is that a healthy modern romantic ideal, or is it a relic of the past?
Anne Bradstreet’s To My Dear and Loving Husband remains a powerhouse of American literature because it refuses to be boring. It’s a glimpse into the private heart of a woman who was supposed to be stoic but chose to be spectacularly, vibrasntly alive. She proved that even in a world of strict rules and harsh winters, love could be a "fire" that "rivers cannot quench."
To dive deeper into early American literature, the next logical step is exploring the works of Edward Taylor or Mary Rowlandson. They provide the necessary contrast to Bradstreet’s warmth, showing the darker, more anxious side of the Puritan experience that she so skillfully navigated through her devotion to her husband.