Before the cameras of Hulu’s The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives ever started rolling, there was just a girl in Utah making dance videos with her husband. If you’ve spent any time on TikTok in the last few years, you know exactly who Taylor Frankie Paul is. She basically invented "MomTok," the aesthetic niche of young, blonde Mormon mothers living seemingly perfect lives in massive suburban homes. But the "perfect" part of that equation shattered in 2022 when Taylor dropped a bombshell: she was getting a divorce.
The internet immediately went into a tailspin. Who was the man behind the camera? And what actually happened to make their marriage implode so spectacularly?
Meet Tate Paul: The Man Behind the Early MomTok Era
The man who was Taylor's ex-husband is Tate Paul. Honestly, if you look back at Taylor’s earliest viral hits—the ones from 2020 and 2021—Tate was everywhere. He wasn't just a background character; he was the supportive "TikTok husband" who participated in the trends and helped paint that picture of LDS domestic bliss.
Tate and Taylor tied the knot back in November 2016. At the time, they were just two young people in Utah starting a life together. Tate worked primarily in sales and marketing, maintaining a relatively low profile while his wife built an empire out of 15-second clips. During their six-year marriage, they had two children: a daughter named Indy, born in 2017, and a son named Ocean, who arrived in 2020.
For a long time, followers viewed them as the gold standard of the MomTok community. They were attractive, successful, and seemingly devout. But as we all found out during the infamous "Soft Swinging" scandal of 2022, the reality behind the front door was a lot more complicated than a choreographed dance routine.
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The Scandal That Ended the Marriage
You can't talk about Taylor's ex-husband without talking about "Swinger-gate." In May 2022, Taylor hopped on a TikTok Live and essentially broke the internet. She admitted that she and Tate had been part of a group of Mormon couples who engaged in "soft swinging."
Basically, the rules were that they could be intimate with other people in the group, but they weren't supposed to go "all the way" or develop feelings. It was a "everyone hooks up with everyone" kind of deal, as long as it stayed within the boundaries they'd set.
The breaking point? Taylor admitted she crossed those boundaries. She had an "emotional affair" and hooked up with a friend's husband outside of the agreed-upon rules.
While Taylor was the one who went public, Tate was reportedly the one who pushed for the divorce once the trust was officially broken. He wasn't interested in the "fresh start" Taylor initially hoped for. He wanted out. And who can blame him? Having your private life—and your involvement in a swinging circle—aired out to millions of strangers is a lot to handle.
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Where is Tate Paul Now in 2026?
If you're looking for Tate on the latest season of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, don't hold your breath. Unlike Taylor, who leaned into the drama and even landed a gig as the lead for The Bachelorette Season 22, Tate chose a completely different path. He essentially vanished from the influencer world.
He didn't want the reality TV fame. He didn't want to be a "character" in the MomTok Cinematic Universe. Here is the breakdown of what Tate has been up to since the split:
- He got remarried. Not long after the divorce was finalized, Tate moved on. He started dating a woman named Bailey, and the two eventually tied the knot.
- He’s a girl dad (again). In late 2023, Tate and Bailey welcomed a baby girl. He’s been very vocal—in his limited social media presence—about how much he loves his new, quieter life.
- Co-parenting is actually going well. Believe it or not, despite the "messy" label the media loves to use, Taylor and Tate are reportedly on great terms. Taylor has mentioned in interviews that they talk daily and attend their kids' soccer games together.
It’s kind of refreshing, honestly. In a world where every divorce turns into a three-part Netflix documentary, Tate just... went back to real life. He works his 9-to-5, hangs out with his new wife, and stays out of the comments section.
Taylor's Life After Tate
While Tate was busy building a private life, Taylor’s life stayed a whirlwind. After the divorce, she started dating Dakota Mortensen. Their relationship was... a lot. There were arrests, a pregnancy, more breakups, and eventually the birth of their son, Ever True, in 2024.
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But by 2025, that chapter closed too. Taylor and Dakota split for good after she discovered he hadn't been faithful. It’s been a wild ride for her, leading all the way to her current status as a reality TV heavyweight.
It’s wild to think that if Tate and Taylor had never started that "soft swinging" experiment, MomTok might still just be a bunch of women in beige kitchens sharing sourdough recipes. Instead, it became the catalyst for one of the biggest culture shocks in social media history.
What You Should Take Away From the MomTok Saga
If you’re following this story because you’re fascinated by the drama, you’re not alone. But there’s a real human element here too.
- Social media is a curated lie. Never forget that while Taylor and Tate were posting "perfect family" content, they were navigating a lifestyle that was eventually going to blow up their world.
- Privacy is a choice. Tate Paul is proof that you can be at the center of a global viral scandal and still choose to walk away and find peace.
- Co-parenting is possible. If these two can stand on a sidelines together after what they went through, there’s hope for everyone else.
If you want to keep up with the latest on the MomTok crew, the best place is honestly Taylor's own TikTok, as she remains the primary narrator of her own chaos. Just remember that for every "tea-spilling" video she posts, there's a whole other side of the story—like Tate's—that’s happening quietly off-camera.
To see how the rest of the original group is holding up, you can check out the new episodes of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives on Hulu, though keep in mind that the cast has shifted significantly since the 2022 "Swinger-gate" era.