Hollywood is basically a revolving door of relationships. You see a couple on the red carpet one week and by the next year, they’re splitting assets and releasing joint Instagram statements about "mutual respect." It’s rare to find anyone who actually sticks it out.
But then there's Kevin Kline.
If you've ever wondered who is Kevin Kline married to, the answer is a bit of a 1980s fever dream for anyone who grew up watching Fast Times at Ridgemont High. He’s been married to Phoebe Cates since March 5, 1989. Honestly, in industry years, that’s about three centuries. They’ve managed to keep their private lives so quiet that most people don't even realize they're still together, let alone that they’ve built a massive, multi-decade life in New York City far away from the paparazzi of Los Angeles.
The Meet-Cute That Wasn't Quite Instant
They didn't meet on a movie set, which is the usual script. Instead, they crossed paths at an audition for the 1983 classic The Big Chill. Phoebe was there to read for the role of Chloe (which eventually went to Meg Tilly). Kevin was already a theater heavyweight and a rising star.
Nothing happened right away. They were both dating other people. It wasn't until about two years later that the timing finally lined up and they started dating.
Kevin has often joked about their age gap—he’s about 16 years older than her—and his own hesitation. He once told Entertainment Weekly that when he first met her, he thought she was "too happy" for him. He sort of wondered if someone that enthusiastic about life could handle his more "obsessive" actor energy. Apparently, she could.
Why Phoebe Cates Left Hollywood
This is the part that still trips people up. In the early 90s, Phoebe Cates was a massive star. Between Gremlins, Bright Lights, Big City, and Drop Dead Fred, she was everywhere. Then, she just... stopped.
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She didn't get "canceled." She wasn't pushed out. She made a choice.
Kevin and Phoebe had a deal: they would alternate work schedules so one parent was always home with their kids, Owen and Greta. But when it came time for Phoebe to go back to work, she frequently decided she’d rather just stay with the children.
"She loved acting while she was doing it," Kevin told People recently, "but she was not driven by it, as I had been."
By 1994, after filming Princess Caraboo (which they actually starred in together), she essentially retired from the screen. Aside from a small role in the 2001 film The Anniversary Party and some voice work for a Gremlins video game in 2015, she hasn't looked back.
Life on the Upper East Side
If you’re looking for them in Malibu, you’re in the wrong place. The couple lives on the Upper East Side of Manhattan. Kevin has famously said that the secret to their 35-year marriage is that they don't have a "Hollywood marriage" because they don't actually live in Hollywood.
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They aren't "celebrities" in the modern sense. They’re New Yorkers.
Phoebe actually spent the last two decades running a boutique called Blue Tree on Madison Avenue. It’s not a "celebrity brand" or a perfume line. It’s a real, physical store where she curates everything from high-end jewelry to quirky home goods and vintage-style toys. You can literally walk in and might see her behind the counter. It’s the ultimate "quiet luxury" move—trading fame for a storefront and a family life.
The Next Generation: Owen and Greta
Their kids didn't exactly run away from the family business, but they didn't take the easy road either.
- Owen Kline: Now in his 30s, he’s a filmmaker. You might remember him as the younger brother in The Squid and the Whale, but lately, he’s been behind the camera, directing indie features like Funny Pages.
- Greta Kline: She’s the creative force behind the indie-pop band Frankie Cosmos. She’s built a massive cult following on her own terms, releasing several albums and touring the world without ever really leaning on her parents' famous names.
The Secret Sauce of a 35-Year Marriage
So, how do they do it? Kevin Kline is 78 now, and Phoebe is 62. They still show up on red carpets together looking like the happiest people in the room.
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Kevin often credits Phoebe’s groundedness. He says she keeps him honest. He also points out that they never bought into the "fame" aspect of their careers. They treat acting like a job, and the store like a job, but their home life is the priority.
Basically, they decided that "having a life" was more interesting than being on every magazine cover. It's a simple philosophy, but in an industry built on ego, it's pretty revolutionary.
Next Steps to Explore:
- Visit Blue Tree: If you're in New York, head to 1283 Madison Ave to see the curation of Phoebe’s store for yourself.
- Listen to Frankie Cosmos: Check out Greta’s 2024 album Different Talking to see how the next generation of the Kline-Cates family is carrying on the creative legacy.
- Watch Princess Caraboo: It's one of the few times you can see the couple acting opposite each other on screen before Phoebe's retirement.