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Penn Badgley is famously private. For a guy who played the ultimate stalker in YOU and the "lonely boy" in Gossip Girl, he doesn't actually want you knowing where he eats breakfast. But fans are naturally curious about his personal life. Most of that curiosity lands on Domino Kirke Penn Badgley wife, a woman who is arguably way more interesting than the Hollywood tropes usually associated with "celebrity spouses."
She isn't just a face on a red carpet. Far from it.
Domino Kirke is a musician, a world-class doula, and part of a creative dynasty that makes most "nepo baby" conversations look shallow. She and Penn started dating back in 2014, long before Joe Goldberg was a household name. They got married twice in 2017—once in a small Brooklyn courthouse ceremony and again in a larger, star-studded party later that year. It’s a relationship built on shared values rather than industry clout.
The Kirke Family Legacy
You've probably seen her sisters. Jemima Kirke played Jessa on HBO's Girls, and Lola Kirke starred in Mozart in the Jungle. Their father, Simon Kirke, was the drummer for Free and Bad Company. Basically, rock and roll is in the DNA. Domino was born in London and moved to New York City as a teenager, eventually settling into the Brooklyn music scene.
She started her band, DOMINO, and worked with Mark Ronson. If you haven't heard her voice, it's soulful and gritty. But while her sisters chased the screen, Domino leaned into a different kind of calling: birth work.
Honestly, it’s kinda rare to see someone walk away from the "it girl" path to become a doula. She co-founded Carriage House Birth, which provides support for expecting parents. This wasn't some vanity project. It’s a massive operation that has changed the way many New Yorkers view the birthing process. Penn has often cited her grounding nature as a reason their relationship works. He’s the actor; she’s the one literally bringing life into the world.
How They Met: A Brooklyn Love Story
They met in a vegan bakery. It sounds like a parody of a Brooklyn romance, but it’s true. At the time, Domino was a single mother to her son, Cassius, whom she shares with musician Morgan O'Kane.
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Penn wasn't looking for a serious relationship. In fact, he’s admitted in interviews that he was trying to figure out his place in the world after the whirlwind of Gossip Girl. He was exploring the Baháʼí Faith and trying to reconcile his fame with his spiritual beliefs. Domino was already on a similar path. They bonded over their shared faith, which emphasizes the spiritual unity of all humankind.
It wasn't an overnight thing. They took it slow.
The Two Weddings
The first wedding was February 27, 2017. It was small. Just a courthouse in Brooklyn with a few friends and a casual dinner at Maison-May. Domino wore a short lace dress. It was very "non-Hollywood."
Then came June. They threw a much larger celebration in Upstate New York. Guests included Heidi Klum, Zac Posen, and her famous sisters. Even with the celebrities present, the vibe was described as low-key and bohemian. They aren't the type to sell their wedding photos to a major tabloid for a seven-figure check.
Raising a Family and Dealing with Fame
Domino Kirke Penn Badgley wife is a title she wears lightly, but her role as a mother is central to her identity. In 2020, they welcomed their first child together, a son named James.
The journey wasn't easy. Domino was incredibly open on Instagram about experiencing two miscarriages in a row before James was born. She spoke about the "birth trauma" and the exhaustion of trying again. For many women, seeing a public figure talk about the reality of pregnancy loss—without the gloss—was a breath of fresh air.
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- She treats birth as a sacred event, not a medical emergency.
- The couple practices the Baháʼí Faith, which influences how they raise their kids.
- They live in Brooklyn, keeping their children mostly out of the paparazzi's lens.
Penn is a stepdad to Cassius, and by all accounts, they have a very tight-knit blended family. Penn has spoken about how being a father changed his approach to acting, specifically when playing Joe Goldberg. He’s said it’s harder to play a killer when you’re coming home to a toddler and a teenager. It puts things in perspective.
The "You" Effect and Privacy
When YOU blew up on Netflix, Penn’s fame hit a weird new peak. People weren't just fans; they were thirsting after a serial killer. Domino has been vocal about how strange that is. She’s handled it with a lot of grace, mostly by ignoring the noise.
She doesn't post "get ready with me" videos or try to be an influencer. Her social media is a mix of birth advocacy, music clips, and the occasional grainy photo of Penn looking like a normal dad.
There’s a groundedness to their dynamic that you don't see often in LA-based couples. They seem to view Hollywood as a job—Penn goes, does his work, and then comes back to his "real" life in New York. Domino is the anchor in that equation. She’s been quoted saying that she didn't really know who Penn was when they met, at least not in terms of his "teen heartthrob" status. That likely helped them build something authentic.
Why Their Relationship Works
It’s about values. Both of them are activists. Penn has spent years working with the American Red Cross and advocating for refugee rights. Domino uses her platform to talk about reproductive health and the inequities in the American maternal healthcare system.
They aren't just a "pretty couple." They are two people who seem genuinely interested in making the world less of a mess.
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- Shared Spirituality: Their commitment to the Baháʼí Faith provides a framework for their marriage.
- Mutual Respect for Careers: Penn supports her doula work as much as she supports his acting.
- Prioritizing Privacy: By staying in Brooklyn and avoiding the Hollywood circuit, they avoid the "goldfish bowl" effect.
Honestly, it’s refreshing. In an era where every celebrity relationship feels like a PR stunt or a way to sell a lifestyle brand, Domino and Penn just... exist.
Actionable Insights for Fans and Observers
If you’re looking to understand the dynamic of this couple or apply their "grounded" approach to your own life, consider these points:
Support Your Partner’s Non-Professional Passions
Penn isn't just "the actor" to Domino; he's a partner who respects her grueling schedule as a doula. Supporting a spouse in a field entirely different from your own creates a healthy balance of power.
Value Privacy Over Validation
You don't need to post every milestone to make it real. The Badgley-Kirke household proves that you can be world-famous and still have a private interior life.
Be Open About the Hard Stuff
Domino’s transparency about her miscarriages helped destigmatize the conversation for thousands of women. Being "real" involves sharing the struggles, not just the highlights.
Find Common Ground in Advocacy
Working toward a shared goal—whether it's charity work or a spiritual practice—gives a relationship a foundation that lasts longer than physical attraction or career success.
To stay updated on Domino’s work in the birthing community, you can follow the updates from Carriage House Birth. If you're looking for more on Penn's perspective, his podcast Podcrushed often touches on his life at home and his views on fame without being overly "tabloid-y." This couple is a rare example of how to navigate the spotlight without losing your soul.