You’ve probably spent a hundred hours stomping through the snow, shouting dragons out of the sky and hoarding cheese wheels like a maniac. But eventually, even the Dragonborn gets lonely. The cold wind of the Pale starts biting a bit harder when you're returning to an empty house in Whiterun. That's when you start wondering who can you marry Skyrim offers up, and honestly, the system is both surprisingly broad and hilariously shallow. It isn't like The Witcher or Mass Effect where you’re navigating complex emotional landscapes or surviving dramatic breakups. In Skyrim, romance is basically a business transaction initiated by a specific piece of jewelry and a willingness to help someone find their lost delivery.
It starts with the Amulet of Mara. Without that chunky gold necklace, you're just another stranger in iron boots. You can buy it from Maramal in Riften for 200 gold—a steal, really, considering it’s the key to a lifelong partnership. Once you’re wearing it, certain NPCs will suddenly notice you’re "available." It’s the Tamrielic version of a dating app profile, except instead of swiping right, they just ask if you're interested right there in the middle of the street.
The Social Contract of the Dragonborn
The list of potential spouses is massive. We're talking over 60 candidates scattered across the holds. But here's the kicker: they won't even look at you twice unless you’ve done them a favor. Skyrim is a land of "what have you done for me lately?" Whether it's clearing out a cave of spiders or just handing over a single piece of ore, that one act of kindness is the prerequisite for marriage.
Why Followers Make the Best Spouses
Most players gravitate toward followers. It makes sense. You’ve bled together. You’ve accidentally hit them with a Fireball in a tight corridor. There’s history there. Lydia is the obvious choice for many, mostly because she’s the first Housecarl you get. She’s loyal, she’s sturdy, and she’ll carry your "burdens" until the end of time. But she’s also a bit... dry. If you want someone with a bit more personality, or at least a different combat style, you have to look further afield.
Take Aela the Huntress. She’s a fan favorite for a reason. She’s a werewolf, a high-level archer, and she doesn't judge you for your more questionable moral choices. Plus, she’s part of the Companions, so marrying her feels like a power move within the guild. Then there’s Mjoll the Lioness in Riften. She’s a powerhouse with a two-handed blade, but you have to deal with Aerin, her "friend" who follows her everywhere. It’s a bit of a package deal that many players find annoying, to say the least.
The Non-Combatants: Local Flavor
Maybe you don’t want to come home to someone who smells like wet wolf and iron. There are plenty of shopkeepers and laborers who are open to the idea of domestic bliss. Camilla Valerius in Riverwood is often the first person players consider, mostly because you help her brother with the Golden Claw quest early on. She’s nice, sure, but she’s also the center of a weird love triangle between a bard and an elf. Do you really want that drama in your Breezehome?
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Ysolda in Whiterun is another big one. She’s an aspiring merchant. She’s smart. She just wants a Mammoths's Tusk. Give her one, and she’s ready to walk down the aisle. The benefit of marrying a merchant is the passive income. Every day, they’ll run a "little shop" and hand you 100 gold. It’s not much in the late game, but early on, it pays for your potion habit.
The Logistics of a Skyrim Wedding
Once you’ve picked your partner and they’ve agreed, you have to head back to the Temple of Mara in Riften. Maramal sets the date. You show up, your few friends show up (sometimes even people you barely remember helping), and you say your vows. It’s a quick ceremony. No long speeches. No expensive catering.
Choosing a Place to Live
After the wedding, you have to decide where to live. If you own a house in any of the major cities, you can move them in there. If you have the Hearthfire DLC, you can build a sprawling manor in the woods and drag them out there.
Expert Tip: Some spouses behave differently depending on where you live. If you move a city-dweller out to a lonely manor in the middle of a swamp, don't be surprised if they complain about the wolves or the dampness.
The Mechanical Benefits
Let’s talk perks. Marriage in Skyrim isn't just for roleplay; it’s a strategic move.
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- Home Cooked Meals: Once a day, your spouse will give you a meal that boosts health, magicka, and stamina regeneration. It’s actually one of the best food items in the game.
- The Lover’s Comfort: Sleeping in the same house as your spouse gives you a 15% bonus to skill leveling for eight hours. This is huge if you’re trying to grind Smithing or Enchanting.
- The Shop: As mentioned, they generate gold. They also act as a general goods merchant, meaning you can sell off your dungeon loot without leaving your house.
Limitations and Frustrations
It isn't all sunshine and sweetrolls. The marriage system in Skyrim is famously rigid. For starters, you can't get a divorce. Once you’re married, you’re married for life—unless your spouse meets a "mysterious" end. Even then, the game doesn't always let you marry a second time. It’s a bit of a technical mess.
And then there are the people you can't marry. This is where most players get frustrated. Serana, the breakout star of the Dawnguard DLC, is off-limits. Despite having more dialogue and character development than almost every other NPC combined, she will politely (or not so politely) decline any proposal. The same goes for Brynjolf in the Thieves Guild or Vex. Bethesda clearly wanted to keep certain characters' stories independent of the player's domestic life, but it still feels like a missed opportunity.
The Diversity of Choice
Bethesda was actually ahead of the curve in 2011 by making marriage "gender-blind." Any player character can marry any eligible NPC regardless of race or gender. If you’re an Orc who wants to marry a high-society Imperial man, go for it. If you’re an Argonian looking for a Nord wife, the Temple of Mara doesn't care. It’s one of the few areas where the rigid social structures of Tamriel actually relax.
Who Can You Marry Skyrim: The Full List Breakdown
To really understand who can you marry Skyrim, you need to look at the breakdown by race and location. It helps to know where to find these people so you aren't wandering the Tundra aimlessly.
Nords (The Most Common)
Since Skyrim is the land of the Nords, they make up the bulk of the list.
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- Argis the Bulwark: The Markarth Housecarl. He’s a tank.
- Belrand: A mercenary in Solitude who loves a good joke.
- Cosnach: A drunk in Markarth who just needs to be beaten in a brawl.
- Onmund: A student at the College of Winterhold. Great for mage builds.
- Temba Wide-Arm: A disgruntled mill owner in Ivarstead who hates bears.
- Sylgja: A miner in Shor's Stone. You just have to deliver a letter for her.
Other Races
If you’re looking for something else, the options get a bit thinner.
- Argonians: You’ve got Shahvee (Windhelm docks) and Derkeethus (Darkwater Pass). Derkeethus is the only Argonian follower in the game, making him a popular choice.
- Dark Elves (Dunmer): Brelyna Maryon at the College is a solid choice. There’s also Jenassa in Whiterun, a mercenary with a poetic soul and a deadly aim.
- Orcs: Most are found in Orc Strongholds. Ghorbash the Iron Hand is a standout, as is Moth gro-Bagol in Markarth.
- Imperials/Bretons: Sorex Vinius in Solitude or Muiri in Markarth (though Muiri’s quest is... dark, to say the least).
Misconceptions About Marriage
A lot of people think that marrying a follower makes them "essential" (meaning they can’t die). This is a myth. If your spouse is a follower and they get caught in a crossfire, they can and will die. If they aren't a follower, they are generally safer because they just stay at home, but even then, dragon attacks on cities or vampire raids can turn your wedding day into a funeral real quick.
Another misconception is that your spouse will help you in combat if they aren't a "warrior" class. While they might pull out a dagger if a thief breaks in, a shopkeeper like Ysolda isn't going to help you take down an Elder Dragon. Pick your spouse based on your playstyle. If you want a combat partner, marry a follower. If you want a quiet home life, marry a civilian.
What to Do Before Proposing
Don't just rush into it. There are a few things you should handle first to make the experience better.
- Get a House First: While you can move into your spouse's house, it’s usually small and cramped. Buying Breezehome in Whiterun is the easiest way to start.
- Check the "Essential" Status: If you’re playing on PC and care about your spouse's safety, you might want to check if they are protected. If not, be careful with those area-of-effect spells.
- Complete Their Quest: You literally cannot propose until their specific quest is done. For the Companions, this means finishing the entire faction questline. For someone like Farkas or Vilkas, you have to go the distance.
Actionable Steps for the Aspiring Spouse
If you're ready to settle down, here is exactly what you need to do:
- Travel to Riften: Find the Bee and Barb tavern. Talk to Maramal.
- Buy the Amulet: Don't find one in a dungeon; sometimes they don't trigger the dialogue correctly. Buy it fresh from Maramal for 200 gold.
- Equip It: Put it on. It has to be visible.
- Find Your Target: Go to the NPC you’ve helped. If the "Is that an Amulet of Mara?" dialogue doesn't appear, you haven't finished their prerequisite favor.
- The Ceremony: Once they say yes, get to the Temple of Mara within 24 hours. Don't be late. If you miss it, you have to apologize and reschedule, which is just embarrassing.
Marriage in Skyrim isn't the deepest system, but it adds a layer of humanity to an otherwise brutal world. Whether you're marrying for the gold, the home-cooked meals, or just to have a friendly face waiting for you after a long stint in a Dwemer ruin, it’s a core part of the experience that everyone should try at least once. Just... maybe stay away from the cannibals. Yes, you can marry some of them too, but that’s a whole different story.