It was the "cheat" heard 'round the world. Or at least across every Bravo-obsessed household in America. When the news broke in March 2023 that Tom Sandoval had been stepping out on his partner of nine years, Ariana Madix, the fallout was nuclear. But the million-dollar question—the one that launched a thousand Reddit threads and kept Andy Cohen up at night—was always about the "when." When did Raquel and Tom first hook up, and how long were they actually lying to everyone’s faces?
Honestly, the truth was a moving target for a long time.
At first, we were told it was a one-time mistake that happened in the summer of 2022. Then it was a "mistake" that just happened to keep repeating itself for seven months. By the time the Vanderpump Rules Season 10 reunion cameras stopped rolling, the timeline had shifted so many times it felt like we were watching a Christopher Nolan movie. But thanks to that bombshell "last five minutes" confession from Raquel Leviss (now going by Rachel again), we finally got a clearer picture of how this betrayal actually started.
The Boys' Night That Changed Everything
If you’re looking for the exact moment the spark turned into a fire, you have to look at August 2022.
This was the infamous "Guys' Night" at the Mondrian Hotel. Ariana was away, grieving the loss of her beloved dog, Charlotte. It’s a detail that still makes fans' blood boil. While Ariana was mourning, Sandoval and Raquel were allegedly bonding. According to the timeline eventually surrendered by Raquel in her final solo interview of the season, this was the night they first became physical.
It wasn't just a kiss. It was the beginning of a full-blown affair.
The audacity of it is what really sticks in the craw of the viewers. They didn't just have a drunken slip-up; they started a secret life. Sandoval initially tried to claim that they didn't sleep together again for a long time after that first night. He wanted us to believe it was a momentary lapse in judgment followed by a period of reflection. Raquel, however, eventually admitted that they were hooking up regularly throughout the fall, even while filming scenes where they looked Ariana directly in the eye.
Why the "First Time" Kept Moving
The reason people are still obsessed with when did Raquel and Tom first hook up is that the duo spent months crafting a narrative to make themselves look less "villainous." They were desperate to protect their images.
If they could convince the world that the affair started after Sandoval and Ariana’s relationship was "already over" (a classic cheater's trope), they thought they might get a pass. Sandoval spent much of Season 10 trying to plant seeds that his and Ariana's intimacy was non-existent. He wanted to build a justification.
But the facts didn't line up.
There were rumors of a hookup at Coachella in April 2022. There were whispers about things happening even earlier, back when Raquel was still with James Kennedy. While those specific rumors haven't been "proven" with the same concrete confession as the August Mondrian incident, the lack of trust makes it hard to believe anything they say. Scheana Shay even mentioned on her podcast that she noticed weird vibes much earlier than the official timeline suggests.
Trust is a funny thing. Once it’s gone, the "start date" of a lie becomes almost as important as the lie itself.
The Mexico Trip and the Escalation
By the time the cast headed to Mexico for Scheana’s wedding, the affair was in high gear. This is where the gaslighting became professional-grade.
Watching the footage back is genuinely chilling. You see Raquel and Sandoval sharing "friendly" moments that we now know were charged with the secret of their physical relationship. This was around the time the matching lightning bolt necklaces started appearing. It was a "hidden in plain sight" signal that made the eventual reveal feel like a slap in the face to the entire cast and the audience.
James Kennedy was there. Katie Maloney was there. Everyone was distracted by the "Raquel and Schwartz" decoy story.
That decoy was brilliant, in a twisted way. By having Raquel flirt with Tom Schwartz, they created a smokescreen. Everyone was so busy being mad at Raquel for breaking the "girl code" with Katie that nobody noticed she was actually in the middle of a much deeper betrayal with Sandoval. Schwartz later admitted on Watch What Happens Live that he knew about the "open secret" as early as August or September, though he tried to downplay his involvement.
The Discrepancy in the Confessions
Let’s talk about that final interview.
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Raquel sat in a trailer, makeup smeared, and finally dropped the baggage. She admitted that the affair was much more constant than Sandoval had allowed her to say. He had coached her. He wanted to keep the timeline tight. He wanted to say it started after the reunion or late in the year.
But Raquel admitted they had sex in his and Ariana's shared home while Ariana was out of town for a funeral.
That is the detail that moved this from a "scandal" to a "tragedy." It wasn't just about a hookup; it was about the total lack of empathy for a woman who considered Raquel one of her closest friends. The timeline matters because it proves the depth of the premeditation. This wasn't a "falling in love" story; it was a series of choices made over months.
What Most People Get Wrong About the Discovery
People think Ariana found a video and that was that. But the discovery was actually the end of a long chain of suspicions.
Ariana had been told by others that things looked "off." She defended Sandoval. She trusted him implicitly. When the phone fell out of his pocket at a concert and she saw that screen recording, it wasn't just the first time she saw evidence—it was the moment the reality of the last seven months crashed down.
If we go by the "official" corrected timeline:
- August 2022: The first hookup at the Mondrian.
- September - December 2022: Regular hookups, including at the house.
- January - March 2023: The affair continues, including Raquel visiting Sandoval’s hometown.
- March 3, 2023: The world finds out.
The Fallout and the Aftermath
The impact of this timeline can't be overstated. It changed the trajectory of Bravo history. It led to Vanderpump Rules getting its first Emmy nominations. But on a human level, it destroyed a friendship group that had been tight for a decade.
Raquel eventually checked into a mental health facility to deal with the backlash and, presumably, the realization of what had happened. Sandoval went on a bizarre press tour, including a much-maligned interview with Howie Mandel where he tried to paint himself as a victim of a stale relationship. It didn't work.
The public didn't buy it because the timeline didn't lie. You don't "accidentally" hook up for seven months while your partner is grieving multiple losses.
Final Realizations on the Scandoval Timeline
When you look at when did Raquel and Tom first hook up, you aren't just looking at a date on a calendar. You're looking at the moment a decade of loyalty was traded for a temporary thrill.
The biggest takeaway for anyone following this saga is that the "first time" is rarely the whole story. In many cases of long-term infidelity, the physical act is preceded by months of emotional grooming and boundary-crossing. Whether it started at Coachella or the Mondrian, the intent was there long before the act.
If you're dealing with a situation in your own life where you suspect a timeline isn't adding up, remember that the "trickle truth" (where a cheater slowly reveals more details over time) is a real psychological phenomenon. Often, the first confession is only 10% of the reality.
For the fans, the "when" provided the closure needed to stop wondering "if." It turned a rumor into a fact, and a "mistake" into a lifestyle.
Next Steps for Reality TV Sleuths:
- Re-watch Season 10 with the August timeline in mind; the subtext in the "Life is a Party" episode is mind-blowing once you know they were already hooking up.
- Check out the "Rachel Goes Rogue" podcast for her updated perspective on the manipulation she claims occurred during those early months.
- Pay attention to the background of group scenes in the early episodes of the season—the "Sandoval Gaze" toward Raquel is much more obvious in hindsight.
The Scandoval changed how we consume reality TV. It reminded us that even when the cameras are off, the real drama is usually happening in the shadows. The timeline might be clear now, but the wreckage it left behind will take years to clear.