You’ve heard it everywhere. In the grocery store. On a TikTok live. During a high-stakes business meeting where someone accidentally let their "weekend voice" slip.
To slay.
It’s one of those words that feels like it’s been around forever, but its current life—the one where your younger cousin screams it because your eyeliner is symmetrical—is actually rooted in a very specific, very deep history. If you think it just means "doing a good job," you’re only getting half the story. Honestly, it’s about a lot more than just looking good. It’s about survival, excellence, and a specific kind of social dominance that started in the underground.
Where Slay Actually Came From (It’s Not TikTok)
Let’s get the facts straight. Gen Z didn't invent this. Neither did Instagram.
The term "slay" as we use it today was born in the Black and Latino LGBTQ+ ballroom scene of the 1970s and 80s. If you’ve seen the 1990 documentary Paris Is Burning, you’ve seen the literal blueprint. Back then, "slaying" was a competitive term. You didn't just walk a runway; you went out there to "slay" the competition. You were meant to be so flawless, so undeniably "correct" in your category, that you figuratively killed everyone else in the room with your style.
It was a metaphor for total victory.
Think about the environment these performers were in. New York in the 80s wasn't exactly a safe haven for queer people of color. Slaying wasn't just a fun catchphrase; it was a way of reclaiming power in a world that often tried to keep these individuals at the margins. When you slayed, you were the center of the universe.
Why Beyoncé Changed Everything
While the ballroom scene kept the word alive for decades, it didn't hit the "Main Street" vocabulary until much later.
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Specifically 2016.
When Beyoncé released "Formation," she didn't just drop a hit song. She dropped a cultural reset. The line "I slay, okay, all day, okay" turned a subculture term into a global mantra. Suddenly, everyone from grandmothers to CEOs was trying to figure out how to slay.
It shifted the meaning slightly. It moved from being purely about competition to being about self-empowerment. It became a way to say, "I am killing it in my own life." Whether you’re finishing a marathon or just getting out of bed when things are tough, you’re slaying.
The Cultural Diffusion Problem
There is a bit of a debate here, though.
Linguists and historians like Dr. Nicole Holliday have often pointed out how African American Vernacular English (AAVE) gets "flattened" when it hits the mainstream. When a word like slay becomes a marketing slogan for a brand selling overpriced candles, it loses some of its original grit. Some people in the original ballroom community feel like the word has been watered down. It’s a classic case of cultural appropriation vs. appreciation.
Does that mean you shouldn’t use it? Not necessarily. But knowing that the word carries the weight of decades of queer struggle makes using it feel a lot different than just saying "cool."
How Slay Works in Modern Language
Language is weird.
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One day a word is a verb, the next it’s an adjective, and the day after that, it’s just a guttural noise people make when they see a nice pair of shoes.
- The Verb: "She slayed that presentation." This is the most common use. It means to perform exceptionally well.
- The Adjective: "That outfit is so slay." This is a newer, more "Internet-brained" way to use it. It’s grammatically "incorrect," but in the world of TikTok, it’s standard.
- The Interjection: Just screaming "SLAY!" when your friend tells you they finally quit their toxic job.
It’s flexible. It’s loud. It’s basically the verbal equivalent of a standing ovation.
The Psychology of "Slaying" Your Daily Life
There’s actually a psychological component to why this word stuck. Words that denote high-energy success tend to have a "halo effect."
When you tell yourself you’re going to slay the day, you aren't just saying you’ll get your tasks done. You’re adopting a persona of confidence. It’s a form of "enclothed cognition" or "manifestation" through speech. Essentially, by using aggressive, powerful verbs to describe mundane tasks, we trick our brains into feeling more capable.
It’s why "girlboss" (as cringey as that’s become) or "main character energy" took off. We want to feel like we have agency.
Common Misconceptions About the Term
People get it wrong all the time.
First, some think it’s related to "killing it" in a violent sense. While the etymology of the word "slay" obviously goes back to Old English slean (to strike), the modern slang version has almost no violent connotation. It’s purely aesthetic and performative.
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Second, there’s this idea that you have to be dressed up to slay. Wrong. Honestly, the most "slay" thing you can do is have an unwavering sense of self. It’s an attitude. It’s a vibe. It’s the energy you bring to the room regardless of whether you’re wearing Gucci or a stained sweatshirt from college.
Is the word "dead" yet?
In the world of fast-moving internet slang, words usually have a shelf life of about six months before they become "cringe."
But slay is different.
Because it’s rooted in a real community and a real history, it has more staying power than "skibidi" or whatever the latest meme is. It’s transitioned into a "staple" slang word. It’s likely going to stick around in the same way that "cool" or "awesome" did, even if the way we say it changes.
How to Use "Slay" Without Sounding Like an Ad
If you’re over 25 and trying to use the word, there’s a risk. You don't want to look like that "How do you do, fellow kids?" meme.
The trick is authenticity.
Don't force it into a corporate email. Please. "I really slayed that Q3 report" makes everyone uncomfortable. Use it when you genuinely feel a burst of pride for someone else. It’s a word designed for celebration. If you use it to celebrate others, you’ll never look foolish.
Actionable Takeaways for Your Vocabulary
If you want to understand or use the term correctly, keep these things in mind:
- Respect the Roots: Understand that this is a term from Black and Latino queer culture. Acknowledge that history.
- Vary the Context: It works for fashion, work, sports, and even just small personal victories.
- Watch the Tone: Slay is high-energy. It doesn't work in a monotone voice. You have to mean it.
- Don't Overdo It: Like any spice, if you put it in every sentence, the dish is ruined. Use it for the moments that actually deserve a metaphorical "kill."
The next time you see someone doing something flawlessly—whether it’s a perfect parallel park or a massive career move—you know what to do. Give them their flowers. Tell them they slayed. It’s a small way to acknowledge excellence in a world that often ignores it.