Ever feel like you're winning at life but losing at being a person? Honestly, it’s a weirdly common vibe. You hit the KPIs, you post the vacation photos, and your LinkedIn looks like a masterpiece. Yet, there’s this nagging hollowness. David Brooks, the New York Times columnist, basically had a midlife crisis about this exact thing, except instead of buying a Porsche, he wrote a 300-page book. It’s called The Road to Character, and it’s kinda become the "moral compass" for people who feel like they’re drowning in their own success.
The Resume vs. The Eulogy: A Modern Identity Crisis
The core of the book is this distinction between two sets of virtues. Brooks calls them Résumé Virtues and Eulogy Virtues.
Résumé virtues are the ones you brag about. They’re the skills you bring to the marketplace: being a "strategic thinker," "expert coder," or "fast learner." They’re about competition, status, and winning.
Eulogy virtues are different. These are the things people talk about at your funeral. Were you kind? Were you brave? Could you be trusted? Did you actually care about anyone other than yourself?
Here is the problem: our entire society is rigged to make us obsess over the résumé. We spend forty hours a week (okay, usually sixty) polishing the external version of ourselves. Meanwhile, the internal version—the "character" part—sorta just sits there like an unwatered houseplant. Brooks argues that by focusing entirely on the "Big Me," we’ve lost the ability to even talk about morality. We’ve become "morally inarticulate."
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Adam I vs. Adam II
Brooks pulls this concept from a 1965 book by Rabbi Joseph Soloveitchik called The Lonely Man of Faith. It sounds academic, but it’s basically just a split personality theory.
- Adam I is the careerist. He wants to build, create, and conquer. His motto is "Success."
- Adam II is the soul. He wants to obey a calling and serve the world. His motto is "Charity, love, and redemption."
Adam I works by economic logic: input equals output. Adam II works by moral logic: you have to give to receive. You have to lose yourself to find yourself. It’s a total paradox, and honestly, it’s why so many high-achievers find this book deeply uncomfortable.
The "Posse of the Dead": Real Examples of Character
Brooks doesn't just lecture you; he uses historical biographies to show what "character" actually looks like in the wild. He calls them his "posse of the dead." These aren't perfect people. In fact, most of them were kind of a mess, which is the whole point.
Frances Perkins is a standout. She was a social worker who witnessed the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory fire in 1911. She watched forty-seven people jump to their deaths because the doors were locked. That moment broke her "Adam I" ambition. She didn't just want a career anymore; she had a vocation. She ended up becoming the first female Cabinet member under FDR and basically invented the 40-hour workweek and Social Security. She suppressed her personal desires to become an "instrument" for a cause.
Then there's Dwight Eisenhower. We think of him as the stoic general, but Brooks reveals he had a terrifying, explosive temper. Character, for Ike, wasn't something he was born with. It was something he constructed through brutal self-discipline. He spent years forcing himself to be the "calm guy" until he actually became him.
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Other figures Brooks explores:
- Dorothy Day: Who turned a bohemian, scattered life into a focused mission for the poor.
- George Marshall: A man who refused to lobby for his own promotion because he believed in the institution more than his own ego.
- Samuel Johnson: Who fought through "vile melancholy" and physical tics to become the greatest moralist of his age.
Why "The Road to Character" Still Matters in 2026
You might think a book from 2015 is dated. It’s not. If anything, the "Big Me" culture has only gotten louder. TikTok and Instagram are basically Adam I on steroids. We are constantly told to "self-actualize" and "live our best lives," which usually just means "buy more things and be more famous."
Brooks is making a counter-cultural argument. He’s saying that the path to a meaningful life isn't through self-expression, but through self-conquest. It’s about finding your "crooked timber"—the part of you that’s flawed, selfish, or lazy—and going to war with it.
The Humility Code
The book ends with a "Humility Code," which is basically a 15-point manifesto. One of the big ones is that "we are all flawed creatures." That sounds depressing, but Brooks thinks it’s actually liberating. If you accept that you’re a "crooked timber," you stop being so shocked when you mess up. You stop trying to be perfect and start trying to be better.
Actionable Steps to Build Your Own Character
You don't need to lead a civil rights movement or join FDR’s cabinet to start this. Building character is a slow, boring, daily grind.
1. Identify your "Crooked Timber"
Be honest. What is your recurring fail? Is it vanity? A need for approval? Laziness? You can't fix what you won't name. Pick one thing and treat it like a training program.
2. Practice "The Call Within the Call"
Look at your current job. Is there a way to do it that isn't just about your paycheck? Maybe it’s mentoring a junior staffer or making sure your work is actually useful to someone. Shift from "What can I get?" to "What does this situation require of me?"
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3. Seek Out "Eulogy Virtues" in Others
Next time you’re impressed by someone, ask yourself why. Is it because they have a cool car? Or is it because they stayed late to help a friend? Start valuing the "inner light" over the "outer shine."
4. Embrace a Little Suffering
Brooks notes that we try to avoid pain at all costs. But the people in his book were usually made better by their struggles. When things go wrong, don't just ask "How can I fix this?" Ask "What is this trying to teach me about my own ego?"
Character isn't something you're born with. It’s a set of dispositions you engrave into your soul over time. It’s hard work, but according to Brooks, it’s the only way to reach a state of "moral joy"—that quiet sense of peace that doesn't depend on how many likes your last post got.
Next Steps for You
- Audit your week: Look at your calendar. How much time is spent on "Résumé Virtues" versus "Eulogy Virtues"?
- Read the source: If you found the Adam I/II concept fascinating, pick up The Lonely Man of Faith by Joseph Soloveitchik.
- Pick a Mentor: Not a living one—a dead one. Read a biography of someone like George Marshall or Frances Perkins to see how they handled moral crises.