Honestly, the idea of inheriting a supervillain empire sounds like a total blast until you realize you have to manage the HR department. That’s basically the hook of Starter Villain by John Scalzi. It’s a book that takes every James Bond trope you’ve ever seen—the volcano lairs, the laser beams, the cats being stroked menacingly—and drags them kicking and screaming into the world of modern corporate bureaucracy.
It's funny. Really funny.
But if you’re looking for a gritty, dark exploration of the human psyche, you’re in the wrong place. This is a Scalzi novel. That means you're getting snappy dialogue, a plot that moves like a freight train, and a protagonist who is mostly just confused but trying his best. It’s light. It’s breezy. It’s also surprisingly sharp about how much the real world actually sucks.
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What is Starter Villain by John Scalzi Actually About?
Meet Charlie Fitzer. He’s a substitute teacher in suburban Chicago. He’s divorced, broke, and living in his late father’s house with his siblings breathing down his neck to sell it. All he wants is to buy a local pub and live a quiet life. Then his estranged Uncle Jake dies.
Suddenly, Charlie isn't just a sub anymore. He's the heir to a global "parking lot" empire that is actually a front for a massive, high-tech supervillain syndicate.
Uncle Jake wasn't just rich; he was the guy who provided the "services" that other villains needed to actually get things done. Think of it as B2B (Business to Bad-guy) infrastructure. But the problem with inheriting an empire is that everyone else in that world wants to kill you and take your stuff. Charlie has to navigate a world of sentient, foul-mouthed dolphins on strike, hyper-intelligent spy cats who basically run the C-suite, and a cabal of rival billionaires who make Elon Musk look like a monk.
The Problem With Being the "New Guy"
The title Starter Villain by John Scalzi is literal. Charlie is a beginner. He knows nothing about death rays or secret volcanic island maintenance. He spends the first half of the book just trying not to get blown up.
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Most stories about supervillains focus on the "super" part. Scalzi focuses on the "villain" part as a business model. It turns out that being a villain isn't about the cape; it's about the cash flow. Charlie’s background as a business journalist actually becomes his greatest weapon. He doesn't out-shoot the bad guys; he out-maneuvers them financially.
Why the Animals are the Real Stars
If you've spent any time on the internet, you know John Scalzi loves his pets. That love (and maybe a little bit of healthy fear) shines through here.
- The Spy Cats: Charlie has two cats, Hera and Persephone. It turns out they aren't just roommates. They are genetically modified super-spies who have been monitoring him for years. They type on specialized keyboards and generally look down on humans. It’s a great gag that never really gets old because, honestly, we all suspect our cats are doing this anyway.
- The Unionized Dolphins: This is easily the most "Scalzi" part of the book. The dolphins guarding the island are genius-level intelligent and incredibly vulgar. They also have a labor union. They go on strike. They demand better benefits. Watching a billionaire supervillain have to negotiate a collective bargaining agreement with a pod of angry cetaceans is peak satire.
The humor here is dry and cynical. It’s the kind of vibe where the absurdity is played completely straight. The dolphins aren't "cute" sidekicks; they're grumpy employees who happen to have blowholes.
Is This Just Another "Redshirts"?
A lot of people compare Starter Villain by John Scalzi to his other big hits like Redshirts or The Kaiju Preservation Society. There’s a pattern here. Scalzi takes a well-worn sci-fi or action trope and flips the perspective to the "normal" people caught in the middle.
But Starter Villain feels a bit more grounded in our current reality. While Redshirts was a meta-commentary on TV tropes, this book is a commentary on the 1%. The villains aren't trying to take over the world in a "Pinky and the Brain" way; they’re trying to dominate markets and crush competition. It’s "late-stage capitalism: the novel."
It won the Dragon Award for Best Science Fiction Novel in 2024 and was a Hugo Award finalist. People like it because it’s a "comfort read" that still manages to punch up at the people who actually run our world.
The "Scalzi" Tone: You Either Love It or You Don't
Scalzi writes in a very specific way. His dialogue is fast. People talk in quips. Some critics find it a bit "samey"—like every character has the same witty voice.
If you like The West Wing or Gilmore Girls, you’ll probably love this. If you want deep, poetic prose, you might find it a bit thin. But for a weekend beach read or a flight, it’s basically perfect. You don't have to work hard to enjoy it. It’s like a well-made popcorn movie that also happens to have a really interesting take on labor relations.
What Most People Get Wrong About the Ending
Without spoiling the specifics, the ending of Starter Villain isn't a traditional "victory." Charlie doesn't suddenly become a mastermind.
A lot of readers get frustrated because they want him to "level up" and become a badass. But that would defeat the whole point. The book is about the fact that being a "supervillain" in the way we see in movies is a trap. It’s a miserable existence fueled by paranoia and greed.
Charlie’s "win" is more about finding a way out of the system than becoming the head of it. It’s a surprisingly moral ending for a book about villains. He stays true to his "everyman" roots, which is why the ending feels earned even if it’s not explosive.
How to Get the Most Out of This Book
If you’re planning to dive into Starter Villain by John Scalzi, here are a few things to keep in mind to enjoy it:
- Listen to the Audiobook: Wil Wheaton narrates it. He and Scalzi have a long history, and Wheaton "gets" the rhythm of Scalzi's dialogue better than almost anyone. The snark just lands better in audio.
- Don't Overthink the Science: This is "soft" sci-fi. How do the cats type? Magic? Technology? It doesn't matter. Just roll with it.
- Look for the Easter Eggs: There are tons of nods to classic Bond films and even some of Scalzi’s own previous work.
- Check out the "Pitch and Pitch" Scene: There is a chapter where rival villains have to pitch their "evil" ideas to each other. It’s a scathing parody of Silicon Valley culture that is worth the price of the book alone.
Basically, if you want a story where the hero is a regular guy who solves his problems by being a decent human being (and having a few tactical dolphins on his side), this is the one. It’s a quick, 270-page reminder that even in a world of volcano lairs and death rays, the real villains are usually just the guys in the expensive suits.
Actionable Insight: If you're a writer or creator, pay attention to how Scalzi uses "perspective shifts." By taking a high-concept world (supervillains) and looking at it through a mundane lens (business journalism and HR), he creates instant conflict and humor without needing a massive budget or complex world-building. Apply that "mundane lens" to your next project to find a fresh angle on an old trope.