Let’s be real for a second. Most of what you think you know about how to make your pussy squirt probably comes from porn. In those videos, it looks like a sudden, violent geyser that happens the moment a performer gets touched. It’s dramatic. It’s messy. It’s also, quite often, a bit of a performance.
If you’re sitting there wondering why it hasn't happened for you yet, or if you're "broken," stop. You aren't. Squirting—or female ejaculation, as researchers like Dr. Beverly Whipple (who basically put the G-spot on the map) prefer to call it—is a physiological response that varies wildly from person to person. It isn't a requirement for a good sex life. It isn't even a requirement for an orgasm. It’s just one specific way the body reacts to certain types of stimulation.
Honestly, the pressure to perform this specific "trick" can actually make it harder to achieve. Tension is the enemy of pleasure. If you're overthinking the mechanics, your pelvic floor is likely tight, and a tight pelvic floor acts like a dam. To get things moving, you have to let go.
The Science of the Skene’s Gland
We can’t talk about how to make your pussy squirt without talking about anatomy. For a long time, the medical community dismissed this phenomenon as "just pee." While studies, including a notable 2014 study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, show that the fluid does contain urea and creatinine (components of urine), it also contains prostatic-specific antigen (PSA) and prostatic-specific acid phosphatase.
Where does that come from? The Skene’s glands.
These are often called the "female prostate." They sit near the lower end of the urethra. When you get aroused, these glands fill up. For some, they expel a milky fluid; for others, the fluid is clear and more abundant, mixed with diluted urine from the bladder. It’s a biological cocktail.
Dr. Samuel Salama and his team used ultrasound and biochemical analysis to prove that the bladder actually fills up right before ejaculation and empties during the process. This explains why the sensation of needing to pee is so common right before it happens. Most people pull back right at the "finish line" because they’re afraid of having an accident on the sheets.
Finding the G-Spot (It’s Not a Button)
You’ve likely heard the G-spot described as a magic button. It's not. It is more of an area—a spongy, textured patch of tissue located about two to three inches inside the anterior (front) wall of the vagina. If you’re using your fingers, think of a "come hither" motion.
Pressure matters more than speed.
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The G-spot is actually part of the internal clitoral network. The clitoris isn't just that tiny nub on the outside; it has "roots" or bulbs that wrap around the vaginal canal. When you stimulate the G-spot, you’re actually hitting the back of the clitoris and the Skene’s glands simultaneously.
Don't just poke at it. Use a firm, rhythmic pressure. Some people prefer a hooked finger, while others find that a curved vibrator designed specifically for G-spot targeting works better because the vibration helps relax the surrounding muscles.
The Mental Block and the "Pee" Sensation
This is the part where most people get stuck. As you approach ejaculation, the pressure on the bladder increases. Your brain sends a signal: "Hey, we’re about to wet the bed!" In response, your brain tells your pelvic floor to clench.
To experience squirting, you have to override that instinct. You have to lean into the feeling of "letting go." It helps to be prepared. Put down a waterproof blanket or a few thick towels. If you know the bed is protected, your brain stops worrying about the laundry and starts focusing on the sensation.
Relaxation is everything.
Take deep breaths. If you feel that sudden urge to urinate, don't stop. That is the moment to push out rather than pulling in. It feels counterintuitive. It feels vulnerable. But that downward push is often what allows the fluid to be released.
Step-by-Step Stimulation Techniques
There is no one-size-fits-all map, but there are some reliable methods to explore.
- Hydration is non-negotiable. You can’t expel fluid if you’re dehydrated. Drink a glass or two of water about thirty minutes before you start. You want your bladder to have some volume, but you don't want it to be painfully full.
- Start with the Clitoris. Jumping straight to internal work often leads to discomfort. Get the blood flowing. When you're highly aroused, the tissues in the vaginal wall engorge and become more sensitive.
- The "Come Hither" Motion. Use one or two fingers. Reach inside, palm up, and find that textured area on the upper wall. Apply firm pressure.
- Vibration. If fingers aren't doing it, use a wand or a G-spot vibe. The high-frequency waves can reach the Skene's glands more effectively than manual touch.
- The "Rocking" Motion. Instead of just moving in and out, try a rocking motion that keeps constant pressure on the front wall.
Some people find that certain positions make this easier. Being on top allows you to control the angle and the depth. Others find that lying on their back with pillows under their hips tilts the pelvis in a way that makes the G-spot more accessible.
Communication and Comfort
If you’re with a partner, communication is the difference between a stressful experience and a breakthrough. They need to know that if you say "don't stop," they should literally not change a single thing. Not the speed, not the pressure, not the rhythm.
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Often, when a partner senses you’re close to climaxing, they get excited and speed up. This can actually break the "trance" and make the sensation disappear. Consistency is key.
Also, talk about the mess beforehand. If your partner is grossed out by bodily fluids, you're going to feel self-conscious. You need someone who views it as a natural, exciting part of sex. If you're flying solo, even better—you have all the time in the world to experiment without any external judgment.
Why It Might Not Be Happening
If you’ve tried everything and it’s still not happening, it could be a few things.
First, anatomy varies. Some people have more developed Skene’s glands than others. It’s like how some people have "innies" and some have "outies"—it's just biological luck of the draw.
Second, your pelvic floor might be too toned. People who do a lot of heavy lifting or high-impact sports sometimes have "hypertonic" pelvic floors. Their muscles are so used to being "on" that they struggle to release. In this case, focusing on diaphragmatic breathing and pelvic floor release exercises (the opposite of a Kegel) can help.
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Third, you might be trying too hard. The harder you "chase" a squirt, the further away it gets. High levels of cortisol (the stress hormone) can inhibit the sexual response cycle.
Actionable Steps for Your Next Session
If you want to explore this tonight, here is the game plan:
- Set the stage. Get the towels out. Clear your schedule so you aren't rushing.
- Hydrate. Drink 16 ounces of water.
- Warm up. Spend 15 minutes on external stimulation before even thinking about going internal.
- Find the spot. Use a lubricant (water-based is usually best) and explore the front wall of the vagina until you find the area that feels "different"—usually a bit ridged or spongy.
- Apply steady, firm pressure. Use the "come hither" motion or a dedicated toy.
- Breathe through the "pee" urge. When that intense pressure hits, don't clench. Relax your jaw (your jaw and pelvic floor are neurologically connected) and push out gently.
Remember, the goal isn't to create a lake; the goal is to feel good. If you end up having a toe-curling orgasm without any fluid, you still won. Squirting is just one of many ways the body can experience release. Focus on the pleasure, and let the physiology do its own thing.