You’re standing in the Bee and Barb in Riften. The air smells like honey, cheap ale, and the questionable decisions of the Thieves Guild. You’ve got an Amulet of Mara swinging around your neck, practically glowing with the desperate energy of a Nord who’s tired of sleeping in a drafty tent alone. But then you look around. Skyrim is a big place. There are over 60 potential spouses, and honestly, some of them are just... bad. Choosing from Skyrim everyone you can marry isn't just about a 15% XP bonus for "Lover's Comfort." It's about who won't drive you crazy when they repeat the same three lines of dialogue for the next 200 hours of gameplay.
Finding a partner in the tundra is weirdly transactional. You do a favor, you wear the necklace, they say "Is that an Amulet of Mara?", and suddenly you’re planning a wedding at the Temple of Mara. It’s fast. Maybe too fast. But if you're looking to settle down in Lakeview Manor, you need to know who brings the most to the table—whether that’s a steady stream of gold from a "store" they magically run or the ability to tank a Dragon Priest while you’re panicking in the corner.
The Housecarls: Loyalty with a Side of Burden-Carrying
Most players end up with a Housecarl. It’s easy. You become Thane, you get a bodyguard, and they’re basically legally obligated to like you. Lydia is the obvious choice for many, purely because she’s the first one you meet. She’s iconic. Her sarcasm about "carrying your burdens" is etched into the collective memory of every Elder Scrolls fan. But is she the best?
If you want muscle, Argis the Bulwark in Markarth is a literal tank. He’s tough. He looks like he could headbutt a giant and win. Then there’s Calder in Windhelm or Iona in Riften. They all offer the same basic package: they can follow you into battle, they’ll open a shop to give you 100 gold a day, and they provide a home-cooked meal. The real benefit of marrying a Housecarl is the dual-utility. They are spouses and followers. You don’t have to worry about your wife staying at home while you’re out adventuring; she’s right there, blocking the doorway just like she always did.
The Problem With Markarth
Markarth is a nightmare. Let’s be real. The Reach is beautiful but the city is built on blood and silver. If you marry someone like Muiri, you’re marrying into a mess. You have to finish "Mourning Never Comes" for the Dark Brotherhood to even get her to look at you. And if you kill both targets? She’s thrilled. It’s a bit dark, honestly. But she’s one of the few spouses who feels like she has a real, albeit twisted, personality.
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The Heavy Hitters: Companions and Brawlers
If you want a spouse who actually knows how to swing an axe, you head to Whiterun. Jorrvaskr is basically a dating pool for people who like mead and lycanthropy. Aela the Huntress is arguably the most popular spouse in the entire game. Why? Because she’s a beast. Literally. She has a high archery cap, she doesn’t care if you commit crimes, and she stays relevant even in the late game.
But don't overlook Farkas or Vilkas. Farkas is sweet. He’s got the intellectual depth of a sweetroll, but his heart is pure gold. Vilkas is the "smart" one, though in the world of the Companions, that’s a relative term. They both make excellent husbands because they are essential NPCs for a huge chunk of the game, meaning they’re hard to kill.
- Mjoll the Lioness: You find her in Riften. She’s a moral powerhouse. She hates the Thieves Guild. If you marry her, you get a high-level warrior who cannot be killed. The catch? Aerin. Her "friend" follows her everywhere. Even into your bedroom. It’s awkward. You’ve been warned.
- Janessa: The Dunmer mercenary in the Drunken Huntsman. She’s one of the few spouses who is actually "evil" friendly. She won't judge you for your Dark Brotherhood antics.
- Uthgerd the Unbroken: You have to beat her in a fistfight. If you can’t handle a Nord woman who hangs out in the Bannered Mare all day, don’t bother.
The Merchants and the Oddballs
Not everyone wants a warrior. Sometimes you just want someone to keep the hearth warm while you’re off shouting at dragons. Camilla Valerius is the classic choice. You save her family’s Golden Claw, and she becomes available. Just keep an eye on Faendal and Sven; those two are still obsessed with her and might show up at your house uninvited.
Then there’s Revyn Sadri in Windhelm. He’s a merchant. Marrying him is a smart economic move. You can sell him your junk, get the marriage gold, and he’s generally less grumpy than the other residents of the Grey Quarter. Or Taarie in Solitude. She’s one of the only Altmer you can marry. She’s incredibly rude to you at first—classic Radiant Raiment behavior—but she softens up once you wear her clothes for a quest.
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Does Race Matter?
In terms of mechanics, no. In terms of roleplay, absolutely. If you’re playing an Orc, you might want to head to the Strongholds. Moth gro-Bagol or Ghorbash the Iron Hand offer a very different vibe than the city-dwelling humans. Ghorbash is a particularly great follower-spouse because he’s a ranger; he actually stays out of your way in a fight.
The Hidden Mechanics of Skyrim Marriage
People think it’s just about the Amulet. It’s not. There are specific "factions" in the game code that determine if someone is eligible. You can’t marry just anyone (sorry, Serana fans, unless you’re using mods, the vampire princess is off-limits).
When you look at Skyrim everyone you can marry, you have to consider the "Lover’s Comfort" buff. Sleeping in a bed with your spouse gives you a 15% bonus to skill leveling for eight hours. This is huge. It stacks with the Mage/Thief/Warrior stones. If you’re trying to power-level Smithing or Enchanting, having a spouse in the same house where your crafting stations are is the only way to go.
- The Store: Every spouse, regardless of their original job, opens a "store." They generate 100 gold every 24 hours. This gold accumulates. If you leave for a month, you can come back to a pile of several thousand gold.
- Home Cooking: Once a day, they’ll make you a "Homecooked Meal." It boosts Health, Magicka, and Stamina regeneration. It’s better than most potions you’ll find in the wild.
- Moving: You can move your spouse into any house you own, including the Hearthfire homes you build from scratch.
Why You Might Regret Your Choice
Marriage in Skyrim is permanent. There is no divorce court in Solitude. If you want out, the only way is through the "Black Sacrament" approach—which is to say, they have to die. And even then, the game doesn't always let you remarry. It’s buggy.
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Some spouses are just annoying. Cosnach in Markarth is a drunk. He spends his time in the Silver-Blood Inn and doesn’t really have much to say. Sorex Vinius in Solitude is fine, but he’s a bit bland. If you’re looking for flavor, go for someone with a unique voice set or a compelling backstory. Derkeethus is the only Argonian male you can marry, and you have to rescue him from a cave full of Falmer. He’s a survivor. Plus, having a lizard man in your house is a great conversation starter.
The Serana Question
I have to address it because every time someone searches for marriage options, they’re really looking for her. Serana is not part of the marriage list. Bethesda didn't include her, likely because her backstory is deeply traumatic and revolves around her lack of agency. Even if you "cure" her, the dialogue options for marriage never appear. You’ll need the "Marriable Serana" mod if that’s your goal. Without it, you're stuck with the vanilla list.
The Practical Checklist for Getting Hitched
If you’re ready to take the plunge, here is the objective, no-nonsense path to getting it done.
- Get the Amulet: Don't wait for a random drop. Go to Riften. Find Maramal. He’s usually in the Bee and Barb or the Temple of Mara. Buy the amulet for 200 gold.
- Do the Favor: You can't just propose. You have to complete the NPC's specific quest. For Ysolda, it's a Mammoth Tusk. For Onmund at the College of Winterhold, it's recovering his amulet from Enthir.
- The Proposal: Wear the necklace. Talk to them. If you’ve done the quest, the dialogue "Is that an Amulet of Mara? I'm surprised someone like you isn't spoken for" will appear.
- The Ceremony: Go back to Maramal. He’ll tell you to come back the next day. Don't be late. If you miss your own wedding, your spouse-to-be will be furious and you’ll have to grovel to fix it.
Making the Final Call
Honestly, the "best" spouse is whoever fits your playstyle. If you’re a stealth archer (and let’s face it, you probably are), you want someone like Aela or Jenassa who won't blow your cover. If you’re a squishy mage, you want Argis or Vilkas to take the hits.
But if you want the most "complete" experience? Go for Mjoll. She has a huge amount of unique dialogue, she’s a powerhouse in combat, and she actually feels like a person with a history in the world. Just... maybe find a way to deal with Aerin. Accidents happen in the Ratway, after all.
Actionable Next Steps
- Check your inventory: See if you already have a Mammoth Tusk. If you do, talk to Ysolda in Whiterun immediately. She's one of the easiest marriage candidates to unlock early.
- Visit Jorrvaskr: If you haven't joined the Companions, start that questline. It unlocks the highest concentration of high-tier combat spouses in the game.
- Build a house: If you have the Hearthfire DLC, start building a home like Windstad Manor or Lakeview. It's much more satisfying to bring a spouse to a house you actually built rather than a pre-furnished apartment in Whiterun.
- Test their combat: Before proposing, hire them as a follower if possible. See if their combat style actually complements yours. There's nothing worse than a spouse who constantly walks into your Fireballs.