So, you’ve probably heard the stories about the French Foreign Legion. Usually, they involve a guy with a dark past running away to the desert to forget a broken heart or dodge the police. It’s a classic trope. But when you look at the story of Simon: An English Legionnaire, the reality is a lot less like a Hollywood movie and a lot more like a grueling, dusty, and often deeply repetitive job.
It’s tough.
Most British recruits who make the trip to Aubagne or Fort de Nogent aren't actually running from the law anymore. The Legion filters that out now with Interpol checks. No, people like Simon usually join because they're bored. Or they want to see if they’re as hard as they think they are.
What the Brochures Don’t Tell You About Being an English Legionnaire
The first thing you have to understand is that the French Foreign Legion is a part of the French Army, but it's its own beast entirely. When Simon—a name used by several former Brits who have documented their time in the ranks, most notably in various memoirs and documentaries—joined, he didn't just walk into a combat zone. He walked into a world of cleaning floors with a toothbrush.
If you're an English speaker in the Legion, you're already at a disadvantage. Everything is in French. "Legio Patria Nostra" (The Legion is our Fatherland) isn't just a cool motto; it’s a lifestyle where your previous identity is basically scrubbed. You are given a new name. You are forced to speak a language you might not know. If you don’t understand an order? You do push-ups. Or worse.
There’s this misconception that the Legion is just for elite special forces types. Honestly, it’s more about endurance and psychological resilience. Simon’s experience mirrors that of many UK veterans who find the British Army too "corporate" and go looking for something more raw. What they find is often 80% boredom and 20% intense physical suffering.
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The Farm and the Képi Blanc
After the initial selection—where about 90% of candidates are sent home—comes "The Farm." This is the basic training phase. It’s located in the middle of nowhere, usually in the French countryside. This is where Simon: An English Legionnaire truly begins his transformation.
Sleep is a luxury you don't get. You're marching. You're cleaning. You're being shouted at in a language that sounds like a blender full of marbles. For a British recruit, the transition is jarring because the British military culture is built on a specific kind of professional banter. In the Legion, the discipline is "Old World." It’s rigid. It’s harsh.
Once you finish, you get the Képi Blanc. This is the iconic white hat. It’s the moment you officially become a Legionnaire. For Simon, this was likely the proudest moment of the first year, but it’s also when the real work starts. You get posted to a regiment. Maybe the 2e REP (Paratroopers) in Corsica, or the 3e REI in the jungles of French Guiana.
The Myth of the Mercenary
People often call them mercenaries. That’s factually wrong. A mercenary works for the highest bidder. A Legionnaire works for the French state for a very modest salary. In 2026, the starting pay is still roughly equivalent to a basic infantryman’s wage in any Western army. You aren’t doing this for the money. You’re doing it for the "Second Chance" or the eventual French passport.
Why British Men Specifically Seek Out the Legion
It’s an interesting phenomenon. Why would an Englishman leave a perfectly good life in Manchester or London to go dig holes in Djibouti?
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- The "Green Eyed Monster": Many are former British soldiers who missed the "glory days" of the regiments and want a more active deployment cycle.
- The Escape: Sometimes it’s just about a clean slate. Life in the UK can feel small. The Legion is huge.
- The Challenge: Let’s be real, there’s a certain ego involved. Saying you survived the Legion carries a weight that other service doesn't.
Simon’s narrative is often one of disillusionment followed by a weird kind of Stockholm Syndrome. You hate the mud. You hate the sergeant. You hate the food. But you love the man standing next to you because he’s also a "stranger" in a foreign land.
The Reality of Deployment: Mali, Guyane, and Beyond
If you look at the recent history of the 13th Demi-Brigade or the 2e REI, you’ll see where guys like Simon actually end up. It’s not always the Sahara. It’s often the humid, mosquito-infested jungles of South America, tracking illegal gold miners. It’s grueling work.
In the Sahel region of Africa, the Legion has spent years fighting insurgencies. This is where the training pays off. The Legion is known for staying when others leave. They have a reputation for being "expendable," though the French government would never use that word. For an English recruit, being in a firefight in a place most people couldn't find on a map is the culmination of the "Simon" journey. It's the moment the myth meets the metal.
Desertion: The Elephant in the Room
We have to talk about the desertion rates. They are high. Some estimates suggest that up to one in three recruits don't finish their first five-year contract. Why? Because the reality of Simon: An English Legionnaire is often just being a glorified janitor who occasionally jumps out of planes.
The "English" cohort in the Legion is famous for being "mafia-like" within the ranks—they stick together. They help each other learn the French "Legion-speak." But when the monotony hits, many realize that the romanticized version of the Legion they read about in books like Beau Geste simply doesn't exist anymore.
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Life After the Legion: The Transition Back to "Civilian"
What happens after five years? If Simon survives and finishes his contract with "Honour and Fidelity," he has choices. He can apply for French citizenship. This is the "Français par le sang versé" (French by spilled blood) rule—if you’re wounded in action, you can become a citizen immediately. Otherwise, you wait until the end of your service.
Many British ex-Legionnaires go into private security. Others go back to the UK and find that nobody understands why they did it. There’s a certain loneliness to being an English Legionnaire. You’ve lived a life that is fundamentally "other."
Thinking of Joining? Here is the Cold Truth
If you are reading this because you want to follow in Simon’s footsteps, you need a reality check.
- Fix your teeth. Seriously. The Legion will reject you for bad dental hygiene. They don’t want to be flying a dentist into a war zone because you have a cavity.
- Learn basic French. Don't wait until you're being screamed at. Learn the numbers and basic verbs.
- Run. A lot. Don't worry about lifting heavy weights. Worry about running 10 miles in heavy boots and not quitting.
- Check your ego at the gate. The Legion doesn't care if you were a Sergeant in the Paras or a chef at Nando's. You are a "Blue" (a recruit) and you are nothing until you earn that Képi.
The story of Simon is a story of grit. It isn't about being a hero. It's about showing up every day when everything sucks. It's about finding a family in a group of people who don't even speak your language.
If you're looking for more info, check out the official Légion Étrangère recruitment site or read memoirs like those by Simon Murray—perhaps the most famous "Simon" to ever wear the uniform. His book Legionnaire is basically the gold standard for understanding what this life actually entails. It hasn't changed as much as you'd think since the 1960s.
Next Steps for Potential Recruits:
To move beyond the myth, start by assessing your physical readiness through the Luc Léger (Beep Test) standards, as the Legion requires a minimum Level 7 just to be considered. Research the specific administrative requirements at the recruitment centers in Aubagne or Paris, ensuring you have all original identity documents, as "anonymous" enlistment is now a much more regulated process than in previous decades. Finally, spend time reading primary accounts from the 2e REP or 1er REC to understand the specific cultures of different regiments before you find yourself standing at the gates of Fort de Nogent.