You’ve probably seen the clips. A pregnant woman talking about her two jobs and a two-hour commute, while her husband sits next to her, seemingly comfortable with his "sabbatical." It’s the kind of content that makes your thumb stop mid-scroll. Honestly, the internet didn't just react to Sarah and Andrew Kim; it basically imploded.
But if you’re looking for a simple "villain and victim" story, you're going to be disappointed. Real life is messier. Especially when that life is being lived out in the high-pressure cooker of TikTok stardom and religious expectations.
The Podcast Episode That Started the Fire
It all started with an episode of their podcast, At Home with Hoemgirl, titled "Marriage is HARD." People usually use that phrase to describe bickering over laundry or whose turn it is to walk the dog. For Sarah Kim—known to millions as @hoemgirl—and her husband Andrew Min (often referred to as Andrew Kim by fans), the "hard" parts were much more fundamental.
Sarah revealed she was the sole breadwinner. She wasn't just working a 9-to-5; she was managing a massive influencer career, commuting hours on a train, and handling the majority of the household chores. All while being pregnant.
Andrew? He was in a transition period. A long one.
He had left a previous church position under what was described as an "ugly ending." For about two years, he wasn't bringing in an income. In the podcast, he admitted he even skipped a meeting with their financial advisor because, in his words, he didn't feel he had a "place" in the conversation since he wasn't making money.
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The internet saw red.
Why the Backlash Hit So Hard
Social media thrives on tropes. We love a "tradwife" or a "girlboss," but Sarah and Andrew didn't fit the neat little boxes people expected.
- The Age Gap: Andrew is about eight years older than Sarah. Critics were quick to point out that when they married, Sarah was still in her early 20s—a time when the brain is still developing—while Andrew was well into his 30s.
- The "Gaming" Factor: Rumors swirled (fueled by podcast comments) that Andrew spent his days playing video games while Sarah toiled away.
- The Religious Context: Both are devout Christians. For many viewers, the idea of a "spiritual leader" husband not providing for his pregnant wife felt like a betrayal of the very values they preached.
What Most People Get Wrong About Their Dynamic
It’s easy to judge a marriage from a thirty-second TikTok. It’s a lot harder to understand the internal logic of two people who actually live it. Sarah has been vocal about her choice. She’s defended Andrew, stating that they agreed to a "united" financial philosophy where everything is "ours."
"If I just married a really rich dude, this wouldn't be happening," she confessed during a moment of raw honesty. But she followed it up by reiterating her commitment.
The nuance here is that Sarah isn't just a passive participant. She’s a high-achiever. She’s been working since high school and has a high "financial bar." Andrew, by his own admission, has a lower bar for material success. This friction is common in many marriages, but when one person is a public figure, that friction becomes public property.
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The Pastor Narrative
Andrew did eventually find a new role. As of early 2025, he began serving as a congregational pastor at WestGate Church. However, the damage to his public image was largely done. Fans dug up old sermons where he referred to Sarah as "this person who lives in my house."
Was it a joke? Maybe. But to an audience already protective of Sarah, it felt dismissive. It’s a classic example of how "inside jokes" between a couple can translate horribly to a digital audience of millions.
The Reality of Being "Famous-Adjacent"
The Sarah and Andrew Kim situation highlights a growing trend in the creator economy: the "husband of the influencer" problem. When the wife is the brand, the husband often becomes a supporting character in a narrative he didn't necessarily sign up for.
If Andrew was a private citizen, his unemployment might have been a private struggle. Because he is part of the "Hoemgirl" brand, his lack of a paycheck became a moral failing in the eyes of the public.
Looking at the Hard Facts:
- Marriage Date: February 2021.
- The Struggle: Andrew was essentially unemployed/unpaid for a two-year stretch.
- The Workload: Sarah maintained a 9-to-5 plus full-time content creation.
- The Family Reaction: Reports suggest Sarah's family was initially hesitant about the union.
What This Means for You
Whether you're a fan of Sarah’s kimchi recipes or you just stumbled onto the drama, there are some pretty heavy takeaways here.
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First, the "united finances" talk is great until one person feels like they're carrying the entire mountain. If you're entering a partnership where one person has a much higher earning potential or work ethic, those conversations need to happen early and often. Don't wait for a podcast mic to be in front of you.
Second, beware the "sabbatical" trap. Rest is essential, but in a partnership, rest needs to be equitable. If one partner is resting for two years while the other is commuting four hours a day while pregnant, that's not a sabbatical—it's a recipe for resentment.
So, what should you actually do?
If you find yourself in a similar lopsided dynamic, start with a "Labor Audit." Sit down and list out every single task: the mental load, the bills, the physical chores, and the income. Often, the partner "resting" doesn't realize the sheer volume of what the other is doing.
For the fans, the best move is to remember that content is curated. We see what they want us to see, and even the "vulnerable" moments are edited for consumption. Sarah has asked for peace as she prepares for her baby. Giving her that space—while still learning from the red flags she’s shared—is probably the most "green flag" thing a follower can do.
Next Steps for Protecting Your Own Dynamic:
- Financial Transparency: Schedule a monthly "money date" to look at the numbers together, even if one person isn't currently earning.
- Set Sabbatical Boundaries: If a career break is needed, set a specific timeframe and a "return to work" strategy.
- Audit the Mental Load: Use an app or a simple list to ensure "house management" isn't falling solely on the breadwinner.