Princess Diana and Sarah Ferguson: What Really Happened Between the Royal Sisters-in-Law

They were the ultimate royal disruptors. Long before the era of modern royal drama, Princess Diana and Sarah Ferguson—famously known as "Fergie"—were the two women who essentially broke the mold of what a British royal was supposed to be. If you grew up in the 80s or 90s, you remember them. They were everywhere. Giggling on balconies, poking people with umbrellas at Ascot, and generally making the "Men in Grey Suits" at the Palace lose their absolute minds.

But there’s a lot of noise about their relationship. People love a "rivalry" narrative. Honestly, the truth is way more messy than a simple catfight. It’s a story of two outsiders who clung to each other for survival, only to have the very system they were fighting eventually drive a wedge between them.

The Secret Pact and the "Police" Prank

Let’s get one thing straight: Sarah Ferguson didn’t just wander into the royal family. Diana actually hand-picked her. Well, kinda. Diana and Sarah were fourth cousins and had been friends since they were teenagers. Their mothers had even been at school together. When Diana was struggling with the isolation of being the Princess of Wales, she decided she needed an ally.

She played matchmaker, making sure Sarah was invited to a party at Highgrove where Prince Andrew would be. It worked.

Before the wedding bells even rang, they were already causing chaos. There’s this famous story from Sarah’s bachelorette party (or "hen do") in 1986. They dressed up in authentic police uniforms and actually tried to gatecrash Prince Andrew’s stag party. They ended up getting "detained" by real police outside Buckingham Palace because they were technically impersonating officers. Eventually, they were let go and spent the rest of the night at Annabel’s club, still in the costumes. Can you imagine the TikToks that would have come from that today?

Why the Palace Pitted Them Against Each Other

For a while, they were a united front. They called themselves "The Wives of Windsor" and leaned on each other during the 40-day-a-year schedules where their husbands were mostly gone (Andrew was in the Navy, Charles was... being Charles).

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But the honeymoon phase with the public didn't last.

The British press is notorious for "The Comparison." If Diana was the "Shy Di" fashion icon, the papers decided Sarah was the "Duchess of Pork." It was cruel. Sarah has since admitted that the constant mockery of her weight while Diana was being hailed as a goddess destroyed her self-esteem.

• Diana was the master of the "long game" with the press.
• Sarah was more impulsive, often saying the wrong thing at the right time.
• The Queen and Prince Philip actually liked Sarah’s outdoorsy energy at first—she could ride, she could hunt, and she didn't mind getting muddy at Balmoral.

Diana reportedly felt a twinge of jealousy over how easily Sarah seemed to fit into the "country life" the royals loved. In the Andrew Morton biography, Diana admitted she felt "terribly jealous" of Sarah’s initial success with the family. It’s human. It’s complicated.

The Fallout Nobody Saw Coming

By 1992, both marriages were underwater. It was the "Annus Horribilis." They both separated from their husbands in the same year. You’d think this would bring them closer, right? Two women, both single moms, both ex-royals navigating a world that wanted to chew them up.

And for a while, it did. They even talked about leaving the family together in a sort of "divorce pact."

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But the end of the road came in 1996. Sarah released her memoir, My Story. Now, Diana had given Sarah her blessing to write a book, but she had one strict rule: Don’t talk about me. Sarah, being Sarah, included a detail that seems so minor today but was the final straw for Diana. She mentioned that Diana had given her some old shoes and, in the process, Sarah had caught plantar warts from them.

Diana was incensed. She felt it was a betrayal of their "soulmate" bond. She cut Sarah off completely. No phone calls. No letters. Nothing.

The Tragedy of the Final Year

This is the part that’s honestly heartbreaking. For the last year of Diana’s life, the two weren't speaking.

Paul Burrell, Diana’s former butler, has recently reflected on how "sour" the relationship turned in those final six months. Sarah has spent the last 25 years talking about the guilt of that silence. In an interview with Harper’s Bazaar, Sarah mentioned that she had been writing letters to Diana, trying to fix things. She felt that they were on the verge of making up.

In fact, the day before Diana died in Paris, she reportedly asked a mutual friend about Sarah. They were this close to a reconciliation that never happened.

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What We Can Learn From "Fergie and Di"

Looking back from 2026, their relationship feels like a blueprint for the modern royal struggles we see today with Kate and Meghan. The media loves to build women up just to tear them down by comparing them to their "rival."

Actionable Takeaways from their Bond:

1. Direct Communication is King: Their fallout happened because of a book and a lack of direct conversation. If you’re in a high-pressure environment, talk to your allies before you go public with anything.
2. Comparison is the Thief of Joy: Sarah’s biggest struggles came from trying to be "the other Diana." You can’t win a game where the rules are designed to make you lose.
3. Don’t Leave it Too Late: If you have a "soulmate" friend you haven't talked to over something petty (like... warts), pick up the phone. Tomorrow isn't a guarantee.

Sarah Ferguson still carries the torch for Diana’s memory. On what would have been Diana’s 63rd birthday recently, Sarah posted a tribute calling her a "pillar of light and love." It’s clear that while the Palace and the press tried to break them, the bond—as messy as it was—remains a defining part of royal history.

If you want to understand the modern monarchy, you have to look at these two. They weren't just "celebrities." They were two young women trying to find their voice in a system that preferred them silent. They made mistakes. They were loud. They were "tacky" sometimes. But they were real. And that’s why, even decades later, we’re still talking about them.

Next Steps for Deepening Your Knowledge:
Read Sarah Ferguson’s 1996 memoir My Story alongside Andrew Morton’s Diana: Her True Story to see how differently they perceived the same events during the peak of their royal years.