You’ve heard the saying. It’s the universal go-to for describing a hopeless situation where no amount of effort can fix a fundamental lack of quality. Usually, when someone brings up the phrase "polishing a turd," they're being cynical. They're telling you to give up. But back in 2008, Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman decided that "impossible" wasn't a word they liked very much. The polishing a turd Mythbusters episode—specifically Episode 113 of the Discovery Channel series—became one of those legendary moments in television history that combined gross-out humor with legitimate ancient science.
It was weird. It was messy. Honestly, it was a little bit beautiful.
The myth was simple: can you actually take a piece of dung and make it shine? Common wisdom says no. Science, however, says maybe, provided you have enough patience and a very specific Japanese dirt-shining technique.
The Science of Dorodango
To understand how they pulled this off, you have to look at Dorodango. This is a Japanese art form where people take simple mud and, through hours of rubbing and buffing by hand, turn it into a high-gloss sphere that looks like a polished marble or a billiard ball. There’s no glaze. No wax. It’s just physics. You’re basically condensing the surface particles and aligning them so tightly that they reflect light.
Adam and Jamie realized that if it works for dirt, it should—theoretically—work for animal waste.
They didn't just grab any random mess from the backyard, though. They went to the zoo. You need specific textures for this kind of thing to work. Jamie went with African Lion dung, which was predictably fibrous and difficult. Adam, ever the optimist, chose an herbivore: the Ostrich.
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The process is grueling. You aren't just rubbing it with a cloth. You have to form a core, let it dry slightly, and then constantly apply finer and finer layers of "dust" while rubbing the surface with the palm of your hand. It takes hours. Your hands get stained. The smell, especially during the initial "wet" phase, was apparently enough to make the camera crew want to quit. But as the moisture leaves and the surface tension increases, something strange happens. The material changes state. It stops being "gross" and starts being a mineral.
Breaking Down the Gloss Meter
How do you prove a turd is polished? You can't just say, "Hey, look, it's shiny!" That’s not the Mythbusters way. They used a glossmeter, a legitimate industrial tool used by paint manufacturers and stone polishers to measure light reflection.
To give you some context on the numbers:
A matte surface usually scores below 10.
Something considered "high gloss" typically hits 70 or above.
Anything over 100 is basically a mirror.
When they started, the raw samples were pulling zeros. By the end of the episode, the results were shocking. Jamie’s lion specimen reached a gloss level of 57. It looked like a piece of dark, polished mahogany. Adam, however, absolutely crushed it. His ostrich sphere hit a 70. That is, by definition, "high gloss." They didn't just prove the myth; they created a piece of art that could sit on a corporate executive's desk without anyone being the wiser.
Why the Internet Still Obsesses Over This
People still talk about the polishing a turd Mythbusters segment because it challenges our linguistic boundaries. We use idioms to set limits on what's possible. When Adam and Jamie proved the phrase wrong, they sort of proved that effort and technique can overcome even the most "shitty" starting materials.
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It’s the ultimate underdog story, just with more bacteria.
There's also the "yuck factor." Seeing two grown men meticulously cradling spheres of excrement for days on end is objectively funny. But beyond the comedy, it showed the show's commitment to the scientific method. They didn't cheat. They didn't use clear coats or spray paint. They used friction, pressure, and time.
It also highlighted the difference in their personalities. Jamie was methodical, choosing the harder path with the lion dung because he wanted the challenge. Adam was enthusiastic, diving into the ostrich waste with a level of glee that only a professional maker could possess.
The Real-World Application (Yes, Seriously)
Is there a point to this other than being a TV stunt? Sort of. The physics behind Dorodango and the Mythbusters' experiment relate to soil stabilization and ceramic engineering. When you compress particles and remove air gaps, you create structural integrity.
It's the same reason a well-trodden dirt path becomes hard as rock.
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More importantly, it serves as a metaphor for craftsmanship. If you can make a piece of waste look like a gemstone, what excuse do you have for not finishing your woodwork project or your car restoration with the same level of detail? It’s about the refusal to accept "good enough."
How to Apply the Mythbusters Logic Today
If you're looking to take a "polished turd" approach to your own projects—hopefully with less biological hazard—there are a few takeaways that actually matter for high-quality results in any field.
- Surface Preparation is Everything: Whether it's painting a car or writing a book, the "shine" comes from the foundational layers. You can't polish something that hasn't been properly smoothed out first.
- The Right Tools Change the Outcome: They could have used a rag, but the human palm provided the perfect amount of natural oil and heat to achieve the gloss.
- Patience Beats Talent: Adam and Jamie spent days on those spheres. Most "failures" in DIY projects happen because the person got bored 80% of the way through.
- Measure Quantitatively: Don't trust your eyes. Use the equivalent of a glossmeter for your work—whether that's data, peer review, or objective benchmarks.
The polishing a turd Mythbusters episode remains a masterclass in taking a joke seriously. It proved that while you can't change what something is made of, you can absolutely change how it interacts with the world. You can turn a negative into a literal trophy if you're willing to get your hands dirty.
Next time you're stuck with a project that feels like a lost cause, remember Adam's ostrich sphere. It wasn't the material that made it shine; it was the two days of constant friction. If you want a high-gloss finish on your life or your work, you have to be willing to put in the rubbing time. Go back and watch the footage if you can find it—it's a weirdly inspiring reminder that even the lowest starting point can reach a 70 on the glossmeter.
Actionable Takeaways for Your Next Project
- Define your "Gloss Level": Before starting a difficult task, decide what "polished" looks like. Is it a 50? A 70? Having a metric prevents you from quitting early.
- Invest in the Boring Phase: The middle part of any project—the sanding, the editing, the refining—is where the quality happens. Don't rush to the finish line.
- Embrace the Mess: You can't innovate without getting a little bit of "dung" on your hands. If you're too afraid of the "smell" of failure or embarrassment, you'll never reach the polishing stage.
- Check your Materials: Just like Adam chose ostrich over lion for a better result, choose the right "base" for your efforts. Some things are easier to polish than others; know what you're working with before you commit to the grind.