You’ve seen the baseball cap. You’ve heard the low, melodic inner monologue that somehow makes stalking sound like a poetic endeavor. And if you’ve spent any time on the internet since 2018, you’ve definitely seen the memes.
Penn Badgley, the Joe from You actor, has spent the better part of a decade inside the head of a man who is, by all objective measures, a total monster. It’s a weird spot to be in. On one hand, the show became a massive global juggernaut for Netflix. On the other, Penn has been famously, almost hilariously, vocal about how much he detests the guy he plays.
The Stalker in the Glass Cage
Honestly, the fascination with Joe Goldberg says more about us than it does about the character. Joe is a guy who murders people because they "get in the way" of his version of love. He’s a serial killer. Yet, when the first season dropped, Penn’s Twitter mentions were flooded with fans asking him to kidnap them.
Penn didn’t lean into the "hot murderer" trope. He shut it down. Hard.
He’s gone on record multiple times saying that Joe is "not a real person" and that he represents the absolute worst traits of toxic masculinity—the kind that disguises itself as "protection." In a 2025 interview with The Guardian, he reflected on how he spent his entire 30s playing this intellectual narcissist. He was 30 when he started; he’s 39 now. That’s a lot of time to spend pretending to be a predator.
It’s Not Just a Thriller
The show actually started on Lifetime before Netflix picked it up and made it a sensation. But why did it work? Because Joe Goldberg is a "twisted mirror." Penn has explained that Joe is basically a symbol of white privilege. He’s the "nice guy" who gets away with everything because he looks like the guy next door. He blends in.
🔗 Read more: Jack Blocker American Idol Journey: What Most People Get Wrong
- He’s been a bookstore manager in New York.
- A shop clerk in LA (where he became "Will Bettelheim").
- A doting suburban husband in Madre Linda.
- A bearded professor in London named Jonathan Moore.
Each time, he wears a new "mask." Penn describes his acting process as the "removal of a mask." He even developed a "superhuman ability" to not blink during scenes to make Joe feel more unsettling.
From Gossip Girl to Global Villain
Before he was the Joe from You actor, Penn was Dan Humphrey on Gossip Girl. If you look closely, the two roles are cousins. Dan was the "outsider" who was actually the ultimate insider, pulling the strings of everyone’s lives through a blog. Joe is just Dan with a body count and a plexiglass cage.
Penn has admitted he was "close to broke" before landing the role of Dan. He took it for the money. By the time You came around, he was hesitant. He almost turned it down because he didn't want to romanticize a stalker. It was only after talking to creators Sera Gamble and Greg Berlanti that he saw the opportunity to use the role to critique the very culture that makes Joe popular.
Real Life vs. The Cage
In real life, Penn is about as far from Joe as you can get. He’s a member of the Baha'í faith, which he joined at 28. He’s an activist with the Tahirih Justice Center, working to end violence against women.
Imagine the mental gymnastics required: spending your day advocating for women’s safety and your night playing a character who is their greatest threat.
💡 You might also like: Why American Beauty by the Grateful Dead is Still the Gold Standard of Americana
He also hosts a podcast called Podcrushed. It’s not about murder or thrillers. It’s about the awkward, cringey, heart-wrenching stories of middle school. It’s human. It’s vulnerable. It’s the exact opposite of Joe Goldberg’s cold, calculated internal monologue.
What People Get Wrong About Joe
The biggest misconception is that Joe is a "broken hero." He isn't. He’s a villain who thinks he’s the hero of a romance novel.
Penn has been very clear: Joe doesn't deserve a redemption arc. He’s even checked in with the writers to make sure they weren’t "going soft" on the character. In the final season (which wrapped up Joe's journey in early 2025), the goal was to give him the ending he deserved—one that acknowledged him as an abuser and a killer, not a misunderstood soul.
The Problem With "Shipping" Joe
When fans romanticize Joe, they are often falling for the same trap the characters in the show do. He’s charming. He likes books. He’s "sensitive."
But Penn constantly reminds his audience: "He is a murderer."
📖 Related: Why October London Make Me Wanna Is the Soul Revival We Actually Needed
He once said that if he met Joe in real life, he would just want to "hold and hug" him because the character clearly never received the love or protection he needed as a child—but that doesn't excuse the trail of bodies. It’s a nuanced take. You can have empathy for a child’s trauma while still demanding accountability for the adult’s crimes.
Moving Beyond the Baseball Cap
With You officially finished, Penn is looking toward the future. He’s been developing his own projects as a producer and director. He’s even released an essay collection called Crushmore in late 2025, which deals with his own struggles with fame and the "malaise" of the Hollywood machine.
He’s ready to leave the cage behind.
If you want to understand the Joe from You actor, don't look at the kills. Look at the way he talks about the kills. He’s used one of the most popular shows on the planet to start a conversation about why we love "bad men" in fiction and how that reflects our real-world blind spots.
Next Steps for Fans and Critics
To truly appreciate the performance, watch the show through the lens of Penn’s critiques. Instead of rooting for Joe to escape, look for the moments where his privilege acts as his primary weapon. Pay attention to the "mask" Penn describes—the way he shifts from the "nice guy" smile to the cold, unblinking stare of a predator. This isn't just a thriller; it’s a lesson in how easily we can be manipulated by a familiar face.