They were two of the most brilliant, neurotic, and famous people on the planet. One was the sharp-tongued princess of a galaxy far, far away. The other was the poet laureate of New York City. When Paul Simon and Carrie Fisher collided in 1977, it wasn't just a celebrity fling. It was a twelve-year psychological marathon.
Honestly, it’s a miracle they lasted as long as they did.
Most people remember the marriage. It was short. Eleven months, to be exact. But the marriage was just a tiny, frantic blip in a decade-long saga of breaking up, moving back in, and driving each other absolutely crazy. They were "two flowers and no gardener," as their friend Mike Nichols famously put it. Basically, they were too similar to survive each other. Both suffered from depression. Both were world-class over-thinkers. When you put two people like that in a room, you don't get a quiet life. You get a lot of yelling, followed by a lot of laughing, followed by a lot of great songs.
The Star Wars Meet-Cute and the Aykroyd Interruption
They met while Carrie was filming the first Star Wars. She was 21, riding a wave of fame that most people can't even imagine. Paul was 36, already a legend but perpetually restless. The attraction was instant. They moved into a Central Park West apartment together almost immediately.
But it wasn't smooth. Not even close.
By 1980, they had split up. Carrie actually got engaged to Dan Aykroyd on the set of The Blues Brothers. They had the rings. They had the blood tests. Then, Paul called. Carrie went back to him in a heartbeat. Poor Dan didn't stand a chance against that kind of history.
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That "Outrageous" Wedding and the 11-Month Marriage
In August 1983, they finally made it official. The wedding was held at Paul’s apartment. It was a who’s who of 80s royalty—Lorne Michaels, Billy Joel, George Lucas. Even Art Garfunkel was there.
Fisher described the wedding as "outrageous." In his song "Hearts and Bones," Paul wrote about it with a mix of awe and dread: "The bride was contagious; she burned like a bride." It sounds romantic, but "contagious" is a heavy word. It hints at the volatility beneath the surface.
The honeymoon was a trip up the Nile with Lorne Michaels and Penny Marshall. It sounds like a comedy sketch, but the reality was darker. They fought constantly. Carrie later said they were "getting worse faster than we could lower our standards." By July 1984, they were divorced.
The Decade After the Divorce
Here’s the part most people get wrong: the divorce didn't end the relationship.
They kept dating for years. They lived together. Carrie helped raise Paul’s son, Harper. They were a family, just a highly unconventional and often miserable one. Paul was reportedly "ashamed" of Carrie's wild moods and her increasing drug use during this era. Carrie, meanwhile, felt "pinned beneath" Paul's controlling, analytical brain.
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She once told the New York Times that Paul was "a little more than he could take" when it came to day-to-day living. She was great for material—the inspiration for some of the best songs ever written—but as a wife? Not so much.
The Amazon Trip That Finally Killed It
The end didn't happen in a lawyer’s office. it happened in the Amazon jungle around 1990.
Paul was working on The Rhythm of the Saints. Desperate to fix their broken connection, they visited a spiritual healer, a brujo. They drank ayahuasca, a psychedelic tea.
While Paul reportedly fell asleep on her lap, Carrie had a vision. She realized he was never going to change. She saw his need for control and her need for air, and she realized they were fundamentally incompatible. They left the jungle, and soon after, she left him for good.
The Songs Left Behind
If you want to understand the wreckage of their love, you have to listen to the music. Paul Simon didn't just write about her; he exorcised her through his lyrics.
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- Hearts and Bones: The ultimate chronicle of their New Mexico trips. It's about "one and one-half wandering Jews" returning to their natural coasts. It’s arguably the best song he ever wrote.
- Graceland: Even the title track of his biggest album has her fingerprints on it. "She comes back to tell me she’s gone / As if I didn’t know that."
- She Moves On: This one is brutal. It’s about a man’s fear of a woman’s anger and her ultimate indifference. Carrie knew it was about her. She even liked it.
Why it Still Matters
Most celebrity romances are shallow. This one was a deep, messy, intellectual collision. It tells us something real about love: sometimes, being soulmates isn't enough to make a marriage work. Sometimes, two people are just too similar to provide the balance the other needs.
When Carrie Fisher died in 2016, Paul Simon’s tribute was short but heavy. "Yesterday was a horrible day," he tweeted. "Carrie was a special, wonderful girl. It’s too soon."
After twelve years of "comfortable hell" and decades of distance, the "wandering Jews" were finally on different coasts for good.
Actionable Insights for Fans and Historians
If you're looking to dive deeper into this specific era of pop culture history, here is how to piece the full story together:
- Listen to "Hearts and Bones" (the album): It’s often overshadowed by Graceland, but it is the most raw, autobiographical look at their marriage.
- Read "Wishful Drinking": Carrie Fisher’s memoir is where she delivers her best, most hilarious, and most heartbreaking lines about Paul.
- Check out Peter Ames Carlin's Biography: Homeward Bound: The Life of Paul Simon provides the most detailed outside account of their Amazon trip and the psychological toll of their relationship.
- Watch the 2024 Documentary: In Restless Dreams: The Music of Paul Simon features Paul himself reflecting on the difficulty of that marriage with a level of honesty he rarely showed in the 80s.
The story of Paul Simon and Carrie Fisher is a reminder that the best art often comes from the things that break us.