Ever had one of those days where you just wish you could hand off your entire life to someone else? Someone who's a better version of you? That’s basically the hook of the 2019 Netflix series Living with Yourself, which many fans still refer to by the phrase paul rudd not me thanks to its existential, "that's me but not me" vibe. Honestly, it’s one of those shows that people either missed entirely or watched in a fever dream over a single weekend and then never stopped thinking about.
It’s weird. It’s dark. It features Paul Rudd wearing a diaper in the woods.
But beneath the "double the Rudd" gimmick, there’s a surprisingly heavy story about depression, marriage, and the toxic lie that we’re just one "quick fix" away from being happy. If you’re searching for the paul rudd not me show, you’re looking for Living with Yourself, a series that remains one of the most inventive things Netflix has ever greenlit.
The "Top Happy Spa" and the Clone That Stole Everything
The premise is straightforward enough for a sci-fi dramedy. Miles Elliot (Paul Rudd) is a guy who has checked out of his own life. He’s a copywriter who can't write, a husband who can't connect with his wife, Kate (played by the brilliant Aisling Bea), and a man who is clearly drowning in middle-age ennui.
Then he hears about a "spa" that promises to rebuild his DNA. He goes in for a treatment, expecting a massage and maybe some clarity. Instead, he wakes up buried in a shallow grave in the middle of a forest.
He manages to dig himself out—this is the iconic "Paul Rudd in a diaper" scene—only to walk home and find himself already there. Except it's a "better" version of him. This new Miles is optimistic. He’s productive. He’s actually nice to his wife. He is the person Miles wants to be, but literally.
Why Paul Rudd's Dual Performance Matters
Playing two versions of the same person sounds like a theater school exercise, but Rudd makes it feel grounded. You can tell which Miles is which just by the way he stands.
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Old Miles carries the weight of the world in his shoulders; he looks perpetually exhausted, like he’s just realized he forgot his keys in a building that’s already locked. New Miles is bright-eyed and annoying in that way only "perfect" people can be.
The technical side of it was a massive headache. Most actors use a stand-in or a tennis ball on a stick to film dual roles. Rudd didn't. He actually recorded his lines for one character, then wore an earpiece to listen to his own performance while acting as the other character. It’s why the timing in their arguments feels so snappy. It’s literally Paul Rudd arguing with his own voice in real-time.
It's Not a Sitcom, and That's Why It Works
If you went into Living with Yourself expecting Ant-Man levels of quips, you probably felt a bit blindsided. The show is classified as a comedy-drama, but the "drama" part does most of the heavy lifting.
It tackles some incredibly raw themes:
- The crushing weight of infertility and how it can silent-kill a marriage.
- The "imposter syndrome" we all feel when we pretend to be okay at work.
- The jealousy we feel toward our own potential.
There’s a specific scene where the two Mileses have to figure out how to share a life. They try to split the "shifts"—one goes to work, the other stays home. But the "better" Miles starts winning. He wins the coworkers over. He wins Kate over.
The tragedy is that the original Miles realizes he’s not just being replaced; he’s being improved upon. It’s the ultimate "paul rudd not me" moment. He looks at his own face and sees everything he failed to become.
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The Aisling Bea Factor
We have to talk about Aisling Bea. In most "husband has a sci-fi secret" shows, the wife is just a plot device. She’s the one who gets lied to until the finale.
Living with Yourself flips that. About halfway through the season, the perspective shifts entirely to Kate. We see what it’s like for her to live with a man who has become a ghost of himself, and then suddenly have him replaced by a man who seems perfect but feels "off."
She isn't just a bystander. She’s the emotional anchor. When she finds out the truth, she doesn't just scream; she asks the practical, devastating questions. How do you love a man whose memories are technically yours but whose body was born in a lab yesterday?
What Most People Miss About the Ending
Without giving away every single beat, the ending of the eight-episode run is polarizing. It doesn't give you a neat "the clone goes away" or "they merge into one" resolution.
Instead, it lands on a messy, complicated "new normal."
It forces the characters—and the audience—to accept that there is no such thing as a "better version" of a person. There is only the person who showed up, the person who stayed, and the history they built together. New Miles has the DNA and the memories, but he doesn't have the scars. And the show argues that the scars are what make the relationship real.
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Is There Ever Going to Be a Season 2?
This is the big question. It’s been years since the 2019 release.
Netflix never officially canceled it, but they never renewed it either. Creator Timothy Greenberg has mentioned in interviews that he saw it as a standalone story, though the final scene definitely leaves a massive "what now?" hanging in the air.
At this point, it’s safe to treat it as a limited series. Paul Rudd is a busy guy (Marvel, Ghostbusters, etc.), and the amount of work required to film him against himself is double what a normal show takes.
How to Watch and What to Do Next
If you haven't seen it yet, or if you only saw the memes and wondered what the "paul rudd not me" stuff was about, go back and binge it. It’s only eight episodes. Each one is under 30 minutes. You can finish it in an afternoon.
Here is how to get the most out of it:
- Watch for the body language. Pay attention to how Rudd uses his eyes. The "original" Miles always looks slightly terrified that he’s about to be found out.
- Don't skip the Kate-centric episode. Episode 5 is the turning point. It changes the context of everything you saw in the first four episodes.
- Reflect on the "Spa" metaphor. Think about the things in your own life you try to use as "Top Happy Spas." Is it a new job? A move to a new city? A different diet? The show argues that you take yourself with you wherever you go—cloned or not.
The reality is that we all have a "New Miles" in our heads. That idealized version of ourselves that works out, never loses their temper, and always knows what to say. Living with Yourself is a reminder that the "Old Miles"—the one who is tired, flawed, and a bit of a mess—is the only one who actually exists.
Instead of looking for a "better you," the move is usually just to be a slightly more present version of the "you" that's already here.