When Aaron Rodgers emerged from a tiny, 300-square-foot room in the Oregon wilderness back in early 2023, he didn't just walk into the sunlight. He walked into a media firestorm. The "darkness retreat" became a late-night punchline almost instantly. Critics called him a "diva" or "unhinged." But if you actually look at the timeline of out of the darkness Aaron Rodgers—both the literal retreat and the subsequent biography by Ian O’Connor—the story is a lot more human than the memes suggest.
He was at a crossroads.
Rodgers was 39. He had just finished a season where the Green Bay Packers went 8-9. For a guy who treats winning like a personality trait, that hurt. He felt the Packers were ready to move on, and honestly, he wasn't sure if he even wanted to put on a helmet again. So, he did what most of us would find terrifying: he sat in pitch-black silence for days to see if he still liked the person he was when the stadium lights went out.
Inside Sky Cave: The Reality of Sensory Deprivation
A lot of people think he was just sitting in a dark basement. It wasn't that. He stayed at Sky Cave Retreats, a facility in southern Oregon owned by Scott Berman. The room is partially underground, specifically designed to eliminate every single photon of light. No phone. No Kindle. No "blue light" from a digital clock. Just a queen bed, a meditation mat, and a bathroom.
Food was delivered once a day through a two-way slot, like a high-end solitary confinement.
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Rodgers initially planned for four days and four nights. Interestingly, reporting from ESPN and other outlets suggested he might have cut it a little short, leaving after a few days. But during that time, he did something called "darkness meditation." Without visual input, your brain starts to do weird things. Rodgers mentioned on the Aubrey Marcus Podcast that he actually ran into walls and the bathtub because he’d get disoriented after meditating. He also spoke about how the experience "stimulates DMT" naturally in the brain, leading to vivid internal "hallucinations" or deep introspective visions.
It sounds trippy, sure. But for Rodgers, it was a practical tool. He spent one full day specifically imagining what retirement felt like. He visualized the golf, the travel, the life without the grind. Then, he spent the next day visualizing what it would feel like to play for a new team.
The 90% Retirement Myth and the Jets Trade
Before he went into that room, Rodgers later admitted he was "90% retired." He was ready to hang it up. But the out of the darkness Aaron Rodgers experience flipped a switch. He came out realizing that he still had the "fire" to compete.
But there was a catch.
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While he was in the dark, he felt the vibe from Green Bay had shifted. He sensed the "Packers were leaning" toward moving on to Jordan Love. When he finally got his phone back and saw the reality of the situation, the decision to play for the New York Jets wasn't just a career move—it was a reaction to the clarity he found in the dark.
What People Get Wrong About the "Out of the Darkness" Book
In 2024, the phrase took on a new life with Ian O’Connor’s biography, Out of the Darkness: The Mystery of Aaron Rodgers. This wasn't some puff piece. O'Connor conducted about 250 interviews, even talking to Rodgers’ estranged parents, Ed and Darla.
The book reveals a guy who is deeply "polarizing" not because he wants to be a villain, but because he's obsessively independent. It covers the messy stuff:
- The "immunized" controversy that turned him into a pariah for many.
- His falling out with the Packers front office.
- The "Island"—a term his friends use for when Rodgers cuts someone out of his life.
The most emotional part of the book isn't even about football. It’s about a 30-second hug between Aaron and his father, Ed, at a golf tournament. For a guy who has been publicly estranged from his family for years, that brief moment of "I love you" was a bigger breakthrough than any Super Bowl win.
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Does Darkness Actually Help Your Brain?
If you’re thinking about trying this yourself, you’re not alone. Since Rodgers went public, these retreats have seen a massive spike in interest. Dr. Munther Barakat, a behavioral health expert, noted that "darkness meditation" helps by stripping away the thousands of visual cues that trigger our stress responses.
- Melatonin Boost: Total darkness triggers a massive release of melatonin, which doesn't just help you sleep; it can reset your entire circadian rhythm.
- Neural Plasticity: Without sight, the brain's "visual cortex" starts to process other senses or internal thoughts more intensely.
- The "Ego Death" Effect: Alone with your thoughts, the "chatter" in your head eventually runs out of things to say. You’re forced to face the silence.
Is it for everyone? Probably not. People with severe clinical depression or certain types of trauma might find the isolation overwhelming. But for a high-performance athlete whose life is measured in seconds and "likes," the silence was a reset button.
The Actionable Takeaway: Finding Your Own "Darkness"
You don't need to fly to Oregon and pay thousands of dollars to get the benefits of what Rodgers did. The core of out of the darkness Aaron Rodgers is about intentional sensory deprivation. Most of us haven't sat in a silent room without a screen for more than ten minutes in years.
Try this instead:
Start by doing a "mini-darkness" session. Turn off every light in your room, put your phone in another room (this is the hard part), and just sit for 20 minutes. No music. No podcasts. Just see what thoughts bubble up when there's nothing to distract you. You might find, like Rodgers did, that the answers you're looking for aren't in a Google search or a Twitter feed—they're usually just waiting for the noise to stop.
If you're looking to understand the man better, read the O'Connor biography. It paints a picture of a guy who is brilliant, stubborn, and deeply human. Whether you love him or hate him, you can't deny that he's one of the few celebrities willing to actually "go there" when it comes to the weird, uncomfortable work of self-discovery.