NFL Player Lorde: What Most People Get Wrong

NFL Player Lorde: What Most People Get Wrong

If you typed "NFL player Lorde" into a search bar expecting to find a six-foot-four linebacker who moonlights as a moody pop star from New Zealand, I’ve got some news. It’s a bit of a weird one.

The truth is, there has never been a prominent NFL player with the singular name "Lorde" or even a high-profile athlete with that surname in the modern era of the league. You aren't crazy for looking, though.

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Basically, this is one of those classic internet "glitch in the matrix" moments where two very different worlds—professional football and international pop music—collide in a mess of SEO and accidental search queries. People often end up here because of a viral South Park episode, a tricky New York Times crossword puzzle, or a misunderstanding of a specific player's nickname.

The South Park Connection and the "Lorde" Identity

Honestly, the biggest reason "NFL" and "Lorde" ever appear in the same sentence is thanks to South Park.

In the show’s 18th season, there is a long-running gag where Randy Marsh—a middle-aged geologist—is revealed to be the actual singer Lorde. He uses the bathroom at his office to record "Royals" and "Tennis Court."

While Randy isn't an NFL player, the character is often associated with hyper-masculine, stereotypical American sports culture. Fans of the show frequently meme the "I am Lorde, ya ya ya" song into sports highlights. If you saw a video of a massive defensive tackle crushing a quarterback with a Lorde song playing in the background, that’s likely where the confusion started.

The Real "Lorde" in Football (Uriah Lorde)

If we’re being 100% factual, there is a football player named Lorde, but he hasn't made it to the NFL Sunday ticket yet.

Uriah Lorde is a name that pops up in recruiting circles. He played wide receiver for Travis Early College High School in San Antonio, Texas. As of the 2025-2026 cycle, he’s been a prospect to watch in the regional scene.

  • Position: Wide Receiver
  • Height: 6'0"
  • High School: Travis Early College (TX)

When people search for "Lorde" in a football context, they are often seeing recruiting snippets for young athletes like Uriah. It’s easy to see how a search engine might see a "Wide Receiver Lorde" and try to link it to the NFL, even if the player is still in the college pipeline or playing at the high school level.

Why the NYT Connections Puzzle Broke Everyone's Brain

The confusion peaked recently due to the New York Times "Connections" game.

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On September 1, 2025, a puzzle featured the word LORDE. Players immediately assumed it referred to the singer. However, the actual category was "Poets," referring to the legendary Audre Lorde.

Around the same time, another category in the same puzzle featured "NFL Players" or team-related names like "Cardinal" or "Saint." Because the words were on the same board, thousands of people started Googling "NFL player Lorde" to see if there was a connection they were missing.

There wasn't. It was just a really hard puzzle.

The "Lorde" of the Trenches: Names That Sound Similar

Sometimes, the brain just mishears things. There are plenty of NFL players with names that sound phonetically similar to Lorde, leading to "did he just say...?" moments during a broadcast.

Len Rohde is the closest historical match. He was a legendary offensive tackle for the San Francisco 49ers, playing 15 seasons from 1960 to 1974. He was incredibly durable, playing in 208 consecutive games. If you’re a 49ers history buff, you might hear "Rohde" (pronounced RO-dee) and think "Lorde" if the announcer has a thick accent.

Then there are players like Rondale Moore. The "dale" and "Moore" sounds can occasionally get mashed together in a loud stadium. Moore is a lightning-fast receiver who has spent time with the Arizona Cardinals, Atlanta Falcons, and Minnesota Vikings.

Real Insights for the Sports Fan

If you're looking for a jersey to buy, don't look for a Lorde one. You won't find it in the official NFL shop.

If you're interested in the crossover between music and the NFL, you're better off looking at players like Marquise "Hollywood" Brown or DeSean Jackson, who have spent time in the recording studio.

The "NFL player Lorde" phenomenon is a perfect example of how digital culture creates "facts" out of thin air through memes and crossword puzzles.

Actionable Steps:

  1. Check the Roster: If you hear a name on a broadcast that sounds like a celebrity, check the official team site or Pro-Football-Reference.
  2. Verify the Context: Most "Lorde" sports mentions are references to the South Park parody, not an actual athlete.
  3. Follow the Recruiting Trail: If you want to see a Lorde in the NFL, keep an eye on high school standouts like Uriah Lorde as they move through the collegiate system.