If you had "dating a clothes dryer" on your 2025 bingo card, honestly, you’re either a psychic or you’ve been following the chaos of the indie gaming scene. Most of us were just getting over our collective obsession with a certain high-elf vampire when the news dropped. Neil Newbon Date Everything isn't just a random search term; it’s the reality of one of the most bizarre and brilliant casting choices in recent memory.
Newbon, the man who basically broke the internet with his BAFTAs and Game Awards sweep for Astarion in Baldur’s Gate 3, decided his next big move should be personifying household appliances. It sounds like a fever dream. It's actually a game. Specifically, it's Date Everything!, a sandbox dating sim developed by Sassy Chap Games that released on June 17, 2025.
The Lord of the Lint: Who is Drysdale?
In this game, you aren't fighting dragons or surviving Raccoon City. You’re at home. You put on a pair of "Dateviator" glasses, and suddenly your furniture starts talking back. Neil Newbon voices Drysdale, who is—wait for it—your clothes dryer.
Initially, there was a bit of a "crisis" in the recording booth. Newbon has admitted that when he first started voicing the character, he kept slipping back into that silky, posh Astarion tone. It’s a hard habit to break when you’ve lived in a character's skin for years. To fix it, he did something incredibly specific. He channeled Rik Mayall’s Lord Flashheart from Blackadder.
If you aren't a fan of 80s British sitcoms, just know this: the energy is high-octane, incredibly flirtatious, and unhinged. Drysdale isn't a brooding vampire; he’s a loud, charismatic, and slightly "floppy" machine that probably wants to tell you how great your pipes look.
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Why Neil Newbon Date Everything Is A Big Deal
The voice acting industry is small, but the cast list for this game is basically a "Who's Who" of the last decade of gaming. You’ve got Robbie Daymond, Ray Chase, and Max Mittelman—the "Loud, Annoying, and Very Annoying" (LAVA) trio—leading the charge.
Seeing Neil Newbon in the mix is significant because it shows the "Astarion Effect" is real. He’s taking roles that are weird, experimental, and fun. It's not about the budget; it's about the character. Honestly, who else is going to make a tumble dryer sound like a Shakespearian heartthrob?
- The Voice: High energy, bombastic, and deeply British.
- The Location: You’ll find him in the laundry room (obviously).
- The Vibe: Pure drama and "glorious" confidence.
Beyond the Dryer: The Scale of the Game
It’s easy to focus on Newbon, but Date Everything! is actually massive. We’re talking 100 fully voice-acted characters. Every single one has at least three endings. You can date the floor (Florence), the ceiling (Celia), or even "Overwhelming Sense of Existential Dread" (Doug).
The game was originally supposed to drop on Valentine's Day 2025 but got pushed back to June. The delay was actually a blessing. It gave the team time to polish the sheer volume of dialogue. When you have a cast featuring Laura Bailey, Felicia Day, and Matt Mercer, you don't want a single line of that audio to be compressed or buggy.
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Is it actually a good game?
Surprisingly, yeah. It’s not just a meme. The writing is sharp. It lampoons dating tropes while being genuinely sweet at times. If you've ever felt like your life was falling apart and the only thing consistent was your washing machine, this game speaks to you.
Neil Newbon’s performance as Drysdale is a highlight because he treats the role with the same level of intensity he brings to a triple-A blockbuster. He’s gone on record saying he loves the "punk rock" nature of indie development. You can hear that joy in the performance. It's chaotic. It's fun. It's very, very Newbon.
How to Get the Best Ending with Drysdale
If you’re specifically playing to romance the dryer—no judgment here—you need to know how the stats work. Interactions in the game boost specific traits: Smarts, Sass, Poise, Charm, and Empathy.
Drysdale responds best to Poise and Sass. He’s a performer. He wants someone who can keep up with his theatrical energy. If you’re too dry (pun intended) or boring, he’ll just treat you like another load of laundry.
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- Find him early: Head to the laundry room as soon as you get your glasses.
- Lean into the drama: Pick the dialogue options that sound the most "extra."
- Don't be afraid to fail: The game encourages "bad" endings because they're usually hilarious.
The Impact of Neil Newbon on Indie Sims
Before this, dating sims were often seen as a niche corner of the internet. Having a heavy hitter like Newbon involved has brought a massive audience of Baldur's Gate and Resident Evil fans over to the genre. It’s a bridge between the high-budget mocap world and the creative freedom of indies.
People aren't just searching for the game; they're searching for "Neil Newbon Date Everything" because they want to see his range. From the terrifying Heisenberg in Resident Evil Village to a dryer that thinks it’s a sex symbol—that is a career arc nobody could have predicted.
What to Do Next
If you haven't jumped into the house-dating madness yet, start by checking out the Date Everything! demo on Steam. It gives you a taste of the first few objects and the general tone of the writing.
Once you’re in the full game, don't rush through the dialogue. The real value is in the voice acting. Listen to the way Newbon handles the absurd puns; it’s a masterclass in "taking the silly seriously." You can also follow Neil on his Twitch channel, where he occasionally plays through his own games and gives behind-the-scenes tidbits about the recording sessions.
Make sure your "Dateviator" glasses are cleaned. You don't want to miss a single glorious moment of Drysdale's lint-filled romance.