You’ve seen it. Everyone has. It’s that sketch where you either see a young woman looking away or a somber older woman with a large nose. It’s called my wife my mother in law, and honestly, it’s probably the most successful psychological "prank" ever played on the human brain.
It’s weird how the brain works.
One second, you’re looking at a fashionable necklace on a young girl. A split second later? That necklace is a mouth. The ear you were just looking at? Now it’s an eye. This isn't just a fun parlor trick; it is a fundamental piece of psychological history that reveals how our brains construct reality from messy, incomplete data.
Where did "My Wife My Mother in Law" actually come from?
Most people think this drawing started on the internet or maybe in a 1960s psychology textbook. Nope. It’s way older than that.
The image first gained massive public attention back in 1915. A British cartoonist named William Ely Hill published it in Puck, a famous humor magazine. He titled it "My Wife and My Mother-in-Law," with a cheeky caption: "They are both in this picture — find them." Hill didn’t actually invent the concept, though. He adapted it from an 1888 German postcard.
Historians have tracked the roots even further back, but Hill’s version is the one that stuck. It’s the "standard" version used in university labs today. Why did a simple cartoon become a staple of cognitive science? Because it perfectly illustrates "perceptual bistability." That’s a fancy way of saying your brain can’t hold two conflicting truths at once. You can see the wife. You can see the mother-in-law. But try as you might, you literally cannot see both simultaneously.
The brain is a sequential processor for meaning. It picks a "winner" and sticks with it until a new pattern emerges.
The 2018 Study That Broke the Internet
A few years ago, a study from Flinders University in Australia went viral because it claimed to predict who you would see first based on your age.
Basically, the researchers showed the my wife my mother in law image to 393 participants ranging in age from 18 to 68. They showed the image for only half a second.
The results were wild.
💡 You might also like: Finding the most affordable way to live when everything feels too expensive
Younger people were significantly more likely to see the young wife first. Older participants? They saw the mother-in-law. The researchers, led by psychology professor Mike Nicholls, suggested this is due to "own-age bias." We are subconsciously tuned to recognize and prioritize faces that look like our own age group. It’s a social survival mechanism.
Why your age might be lying to you
If you’re 25 and you saw the old woman first, don't panic. You aren't "old at heart" in some mystical way. The bias is a statistical trend, not a hard rule. Factors like where your eyes first land on the page—the "fixation point"—matter more than almost anything else.
If your eyes hit the center-left of the image, you’re likely to see the nose of the mother-in-law. If you look further right, toward the "ear," you’re probably going to see the young woman's profile.
It’s about visual anchors.
The Mechanics of the Flip
Let’s get into the weeds of how the image actually "works" visually. It’s a masterpiece of ambiguous line work.
The "necklace" on the young woman is the "mouth" of the old woman.
The "chin" of the young woman is the "nose" of the old woman.
The "ear" of the young woman is the "eye" of the old woman.
When you look at my wife my mother in law, your visual cortex is receiving the same raw data regardless of what you see. The photons hitting your retina don't change. The change happens in the higher-order processing centers of the brain. This is known as "top-down processing." Your expectations, memories, and even your current mood influence how the brain assembles the lines.
If I tell you to look for a chin, you’ll likely find the young woman. If I tell you to look for a massive nose, the old woman will jump out at you. Priming is a powerful drug.
Why This Illusion Matters for E-E-A-T and Science
Psychologists like Edwin Boring (who wrote about this image extensively in 1930, leading many to call it the "Boring Figure") used it to prove that perception is an active process. We aren't cameras. Cameras just record light. Humans interpret light.
📖 Related: Executive desk with drawers: Why your home office setup is probably failing you
This image is a cornerstone of Gestalt psychology. The Gestaltists believed that the "whole is different than the sum of its parts." In the my wife my mother in law sketch, the individual lines are meaningless. It’s only when the brain organizes them into a "global" structure that they take on the identity of a person.
Interestingly, some people with specific types of prosopagnosia (face blindness) struggle with this illusion. They can see the lines, but they can't make the "jump" to the facial recognition that allows the two images to toggle.
Misconceptions about the "Winner"
Some TikTok "psychology" creators claim that seeing the old woman means you’re pessimistic, or seeing the young woman means you’re a romantic.
Honestly? That’s total nonsense.
There is zero peer-reviewed evidence linking personality traits to which figure you see first in my wife my mother in law. It’s almost entirely about age-bias, fixation points, and what you were looking at right before you saw the image. If you just walked past a mirror, you’re more likely to see the version that looks like you.
How to Force the "Switch"
If you’re stuck seeing only one version, it can be incredibly frustrating. It’s like a "Magic Eye" poster that won’t resolve. Here is how you break the brain's lock on the image:
- To see the young woman: Focus on the small "ear." Realize that the "big nose" of the old woman is actually the jawline and chin of the young girl looking away. The "eye" of the old woman is a piece of hair or a scarf.
- To see the old woman: Look at the "necklace" of the young girl. Imagine it is a mouth. The chin of the young girl is now a massive nose. The ear is an eye.
- The "W" Trick: Cover the top half of the image. It’s often easier to see the old woman when you can’t see the hair/hat of the young woman.
Real-World Applications of Perceptual Ambiguity
This isn't just for internet memes. Engineers and UI/UX designers study images like my wife my mother in law to understand how to prevent "perceptual errors" in high-stakes environments.
Think about pilots or surgeons.
If a display is ambiguous, a tired pilot might misinterpret a gauge. By studying how the brain "flips" between two interpretations of the same data, designers can create interfaces that are "mono-stable"—meaning they can only be interpreted one way. We want the opposite of a my wife my mother in law situation when someone is landing a plane.
👉 See also: Monroe Central High School Ohio: What Local Families Actually Need to Know
It’s also used in marketing. Brands often use "hidden" or ambiguous imagery in logos (think of the FedEx arrow) to engage the brain’s "aha!" moment. When your brain finally finds the "hidden" image, it releases a tiny hit of dopamine. It’s a reward for solving the puzzle.
Actionable Takeaways for Your Brain
So, what can you actually do with this information? Besides winning a bar bet or sounding smart at dinner?
Recognize your own bias.
The my wife my mother in law illusion is a perfect metaphor for everyday life. We often think we are seeing "the truth," when we are actually just seeing one interpretation of the facts. Just because you see a "mother-in-law" doesn't mean the "wife" isn't there.
Train your cognitive flexibility.
Practicing with ambiguous figures can actually help with "mental set shifting." This is the ability to move between different concepts or think about multiple concepts simultaneously.
Understand "Own-Age Bias."
Be aware that your brain is naturally tuned to prioritize people who look like you. Whether it’s in hiring, socializing, or just walking down the street, your brain is doing a "first pass" filter that might be excluding people based on age or appearance before you’ve even consciously processed them.
Don't trust your first impression.
The next time you’re in a heated argument and you’re certain you’re right, remember the illusion. Your brain might be locked into one "perceptual winner" while the other person is looking at the exact same data and seeing something completely different.
To master the switch, you have to look for the "ear" that is actually an "eye." You have to be willing to let go of the "chin" to see the "nose." It's a skill.
Test it on your family.
Show the image to the oldest and youngest people you know. Don’t prompt them. Just ask, "What is this a picture of?" Note the difference. It’s a fascinating, low-stakes way to see the "own-age bias" in action in real-time.
Use it for focus training.
Try to hold one image for exactly sixty seconds without letting it "flip." It’s harder than it sounds. Your brain will naturally try to "refresh" the data, causing the image to toggle. Mastering this level of attentional control is a great exercise for mindfulness and concentration.
Ultimately, my wife my mother in law is a reminder that the world isn't just what we see—it's what we tell ourselves about what we see. The lines on the paper never change. Only you do.