If you’ve spent any time on the corner of the internet that obsesses over 2000s sitcoms, you know the deal. People are absolutely convinced that Mindy Kaling and B.J. Novak are secretly married, or at least living some kind of suburban domestic fantasy behind closed doors. It’s the ultimate "will-they-won't-they" that somehow outlasted the actual show that birthed it.
But here is the thing: they aren’t dating. Not right now, anyway.
As of early 2026, B.J. Novak has been linked to other people, including his high-profile relationship with TikTok creator Delaney Rowe that made waves last year. Meanwhile, Mindy is busy being a powerhouse mogul and a mother of three. Yet, the questions never stop. Why? Because their history is a "tumultuous romantic toxic boundaryless mess"—his words, not mine.
The Office Years: When They Actually Were a Couple
Let’s go back to 2004. Two young, hungry writers get hired for the American version of The Office. They’re 24. They’re "reckless idiots." They’re stuck in a writers' room for fourteen hours a day. Honestly, it was inevitable.
They started dating almost immediately, but it wasn't a clean, Hollywood-romance kind of thing. It was messy. They would have these massive, screaming arguments in the writers' room, then stomp off to their respective offices and continue the fight over AOL Instant Messenger. It was so intense that the producers—noticing the sparks and the chaos—basically said, "We have to put this on camera."
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That is how we got Kelly Kapoor and Ryan Howard. Life didn't just imitate art; it was the blueprint for it.
The "real" Mindy Kaling and BJ Novak dating era lasted from roughly 2004 to 2007. Mindy later told Howard Stern that B.J. was the one who broke it off, and it completely gutted her. She was "so sad, not angry, just sad." She even admitted that if he had asked her to marry him back then, she would have said yes in a heartbeat.
The "Soup Snake" Era and the Godfather Reveal
After the breakup, most people would’ve just moved on. They didn't. They stayed "inseparable best friends with a lot of chemistry," which is a nightmare for anyone else they try to date. Imagine trying to be B.J. Novak's girlfriend and realizing his "bestie" is Mindy Kaling. It’s a lot.
In 2013, Mindy famously called him her "soup snake"—a Michael Scott-ism for soul mate. It stuck.
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Then came the kids. Mindy’s daughter, Katherine (Kit), was born in 2017. Then Spencer in 2020. And in early 2024, she surprised everyone with a third baby, Anne. Through all of it, Mindy has kept the identity of the father private. Naturally, the internet decided it must be B.J.
He isn't the dad (at least according to every public statement they've ever made), but he is the godfather. He shows up at her house once a week. He dresses up as Santa for them—even though, as Mindy pointed out, she's Hindu and he's Jewish. He’s "family now," which Mindy admits is a "less sexy" characterization than people want, but it’s the truth.
Why We Can't Let the Dream Die
Why are we still talking about this in 2026? It’s because their dynamic is "weird as hell." That’s Mindy’s own description from an InStyle interview. She said he’s not her boyfriend, but he’s not just a best friend either. It’s a "romantically charged camaraderie."
When she got her star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in February 2025, B.J. was there. He gave a speech that was so tender it launched a thousand TikTok edits. He called her an "incredible mother" and a "person who means so much to so many."
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There’s a specific kind of comfort in their relationship that’s rare in Hollywood. They’ve known each other for over 20 years. They’ve seen each other’s worst versions. They still choose to be the person the other calls first.
The Facts vs. The Fan Fiction
- Status: Not dating. B.J. has been seen with others, and Mindy is a single-by-choice mom.
- The Kids: He is the godfather to all three (Katherine, Spencer, and Anne).
- The Connection: They still work together. B.J. was a consulting producer on The Mindy Project and they frequently consult on each other's scripts.
- The Drama: The "toxic" part is mostly in the past. They’ve traded the loud arguments for a deep, domestic friendship.
Navigating a "Complicated" Friendship
If you’re looking for a lesson in the Mindy Kaling and BJ Novak dating saga, it’s that relationships don’t always have to fit into a neat little box. Sometimes an ex becomes a brother. Sometimes a "soup snake" is just the person who helps you raise your kids without ever sharing a bedroom.
It’s confusing for us, sure. But for them? It seems to be exactly what they need. Mindy told Marie Claire that the rumors don’t bother her. If people find their bond "titillating," she’ll take it.
So, if you want to understand their current vibe, look at their 2022 Emmys bit. They joked about their "insanely complicated" relationship born from the grind of The Office. It was funny because it was true. They are the ultimate example of why you shouldn't always burn the bridge after a breakup. Sometimes, you just need to rebuild it into something a bit more sturdy, even if it looks "weird" from the outside.
Actionable Next Steps:
- Watch the Evolution: Go back and watch Season 2 and 3 of The Office. Knowing their real-life arguments were fueling the Ryan/Kelly scenes makes the "The Injury" and "Casino Night" episodes hit totally differently.
- Read the Essays: If you want the deeper, more emotional side of their bond, pick up Mindy’s book Nothing Like I Imagined. She gets surprisingly raw about her social anxiety and how B.J. is the one person who knows how to navigate it.
- Check the Credits: Look for B.J.'s name in the acknowledgments of Mindy's books and vice versa. It’s a masterclass in how to support a creative partner long after the romance has fizzled.