Link: The Faces of Evil is Actually Stranger Than You Remember

Link: The Faces of Evil is Actually Stranger Than You Remember

If you spent any time on the internet in the mid-2000s, you’ve seen it. You’ve seen the zoomed-in, distorted face of Morshu the shopkeeper. You’ve heard the stilted, bizarrely enthusiastic voice of a King demanding to know what’s for dinner. Link: The Faces of Evil is basically a permanent resident of the "weird side of YouTube," and for most people, that’s where the story starts and ends. It’s a meme. It’s a punchline. It’s a 1993 mistake that Nintendo wishes they could scrub from the collective memory of the planet.

But honestly? The actual history behind this game is way more fascinating than just "it's bad." It’s a story of a massive corporate breakup, a tiny budget, and a Russian animation studio that had no idea what a Zelda game was supposed to look like. It’s a piece of software that exists because of a legal loophole, and despite its reputation, it actually tried to do things the Super Nintendo couldn’t even dream of.

The Sony-Nintendo Breakup That Created a Monster

You can’t talk about this game without talking about the deal that went sour. Back in the late 80s, Nintendo and Sony were actually working together to create a CD-ROM add-on for the SNES. It was called the "Play Station." Yes, that one. At the last minute, Nintendo’s president, Hiroshi Yamauchi, realized the contract gave Sony way too much control over the software. He famously backstabbed Sony by announcing a partnership with Philips instead.

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The Philips deal eventually fell through too, but part of the settlement gave Philips the right to use five Nintendo characters in games for their own console, the CD-i. Philips wasn’t a gaming powerhouse. They were an electronics company trying to sell a "multimedia" machine. They looked at the Zelda license and handed it to a small developer called Animation Magic.

That’s where things got weird. Link: The Faces of Evil wasn't developed in Japan. It was developed in Massachusetts, with the animation being outsourced to St. Petersburg, Russia. The Russian animators were incredibly talented, but they were working on shoestring budgets and had never seen a Zelda game in their lives. They were handed character designs and told to make them move. The result was that fluid, unsettling, "squash and stretch" animation style that became the foundation for a thousand YouTube Poops.

If you try to play it today, you’ll realize the controls are the real villain. Most CD-i players didn’t come with a traditional gamepad. They came with a "remote control" that looked more like something you'd use to change the channel on a CRT television. Imagine trying to time a precise jump over a pit using a directional pad that has the responsiveness of a soggy sponge. It’s brutal.

The game is a side-scrolling action-adventure, which was a huge departure from the top-down perspective of the original NES games or A Link to the Past. You’re exploring the island of Koridai, trying to defeat Ganon’s "faces of evil"—which are literally giant stone heads that serve as dungeons.

The backgrounds are actually quite beautiful. They were hand-painted by artists and scanned into the system. For 1993, the visual fidelity of the environments was technically superior to what the SNES could output. But the gameplay didn't match the art. Link moves like he’s walking through honey. To enter a door, you have to press "Up" on the controller, but the hitboxes are so finicky that you’ll often find yourself swinging your sword at a wall instead of progressing.

The Voice Acting and the Script

"Gee, it sure is boring around here!"

That’s the opening line of the game. It’s iconic now, but at the time, it was a genuine attempt to use the "massive" storage capacity of a CD-ROM. Before the CD-i, games mostly used text boxes. Being able to hear Link and Zelda actually speak was a massive selling point. The problem was that the script felt like a Saturday morning cartoon rejected by every major network.

Jeffrey Rath, the voice of Link, and Bonnie Jean Wilbur, the voice of Zelda, gave performances that were... enthusiastic. That’s the kindest word for it. They weren't professional voice actors in the way we think of them today; they were just people available to the small development team. Because the CD-i couldn't handle full-screen video well, the cutscenes are these strange, compressed windows of animation that look like a fever dream.

The Real Technical Innovation

Despite the hate, we have to give credit where it’s due. This game pushed the hardware.

  • CD-Quality Audio: The music in Link: The Faces of Evil is actually pretty good. It’s synth-heavy and atmospheric, utilizing the CD format to provide a soundtrack that wasn't limited by MIDI chips.
  • High-Resolution Backgrounds: The 256-color digitized paintings were a leap forward. They gave the world a "storybook" feel that Nintendo wouldn't really experiment with again until much later.
  • Full Motion Video (FMV): At a time when Sega CD was struggling with grainy, black-and-white video, the CD-i was pushing relatively colorful (if choppy) animation.

Common Misconceptions About the CD-i Zeldas

People often group Link: The Faces of Evil with Zelda: The Wand of Gamelon and Zelda's Adventure. While the first two were developed simultaneously by Animation Magic and share the same engine, Zelda's Adventure was developed by a completely different company (Viridis) and looks like a digitized mess of live-action actors.

Another big myth is that Nintendo had no oversight. They actually did have some. They provided the character bibles and approved the designs. They just didn't care that much because they viewed the CD-i as a non-competitor. To Nintendo, this was just a legal obligation they had to fulfill to get out of a bad contract.

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The Legacy of Koridai

So, why does this game still matter? Why are people still talking about a 30-year-old failure? It’s because of the "so bad it's good" phenomenon. But it’s also a reminder of a time when the gaming industry was the Wild West. Before everything was polished and focus-grouped to death, you could have a Russian-animated, American-coded, Dutch-published Zelda game.

It’s a historical curiosity. It’s the "uncanny valley" of the Zelda franchise. It shows what happens when a legendary IP is divorced from its creators and fed through the lens of early-90s multimedia hype.

How to Experience it Today (Without Breaking the Bank)

Buying a working Philips CD-i and a copy of the game will cost you hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars. The hardware is notorious for failing, specifically the "Timekeeper" chip which has a built-in battery that dies and leaks.

If you're actually curious about the gameplay, there are a few ways to dive in:

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  1. The Fan Remakes: A few years ago, a dedicated developer remade The Faces of Evil and The Wand of Gamelon from scratch for modern PCs. They fixed the controls, added widescreen support, and made the games actually playable. They were eventually taken down, but they’re still floating around the internet.
  2. Emulation: MAME (Multiple Arcade Machine Emulator) has improved its CD-i support significantly, though it’s still a bit of a headache to set up.
  3. Longplays: Honestly, for most people, watching a "Longplay" on YouTube is the best way to soak in the weirdness without the frustration of the controls.

Actionable Steps for Retro Collectors

If you are hell-bent on owning the physical disc, you need to be careful. The CD-i community is small but prices are inflated.

  • Check the Disc Surface: CD-i discs are prone to "disc rot"—tiny pinholes in the reflective layer that make the game unplayable. Hold the disc up to a light source; if you see light shining through the art, walk away.
  • The Controller Issue: Do not buy a CD-i without a "Gravis" style gamepad if you intend to play. The "spoon" remote or the rollerball controllers make the game literally impossible to beat.
  • Battery Maintenance: If you buy a console, you’ll likely need to perform a "Timekeeper mod" to replace the internal battery, otherwise you won't be able to save your progress.

Link: The Faces of Evil isn't a good game by modern standards, and it wasn't even a good game by 1993 standards. But it is a fascinating piece of software that represents a specific moment in tech history where two giants clashed, and the collateral damage was a green-clad hero in a very strange land. It’s worth remembering not just for the memes, but for the chaotic corporate drama that allowed it to exist in the first place.