You've probably seen the ads. Someone sitting on a beach with a laptop, or maybe a high-energy person on LinkedIn talking about "unlocking your potential." It’s everywhere. But when you actually sit down to ask yourself life coaching what is it, the answer usually feels a bit fuzzy. It’s not a therapist. It’s not your boss. It’s definitely not your mom, though they might both give you advice you didn’t ask for. Honestly, life coaching is a professional partnership designed to help you bridge the gap between where you are right now and where you actually want to be.
It’s about the future.
While a therapist often looks back to heal old wounds or manage clinical mental health issues, a coach is looking at the horizon. They want to know what’s stopping you from finishing that book, starting that business, or just feeling like you have your life together. It’s practical. It’s often loud. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable.
The Mechanics of a Coaching Session
If you walk into a coaching session expecting a lecture, you’re in for a surprise. It’s mostly questions. The International Coaching Federation (ICF), which is basically the gold standard for credentialing in this Wild West of an industry, defines coaching as "partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process."
What does that look like in real life? Imagine you’re stuck. You tell your coach, "I want to change careers but I’m scared." A bad coach says, "Just do it!" A real coach asks, "What is the specific risk that feels most real to you today?" They dig. They use something called "active listening," where they’re not just waiting for their turn to talk, but actually hearing the subtext of your frustration.
Why People Get It Mixed Up With Therapy
This is the big one. People get confused because both involve two people talking in a room (or on Zoom). But the frameworks are worlds apart. Therapy is healthcare. It deals with the "why"—why do I feel this way? Why did my childhood affect my relationships? Life coaching is about the "how." How do I get from Point A to Point B?
It’s important to be clear: a coach is not a doctor. They cannot diagnose depression, anxiety, or PTSD. In fact, ethical coaches are trained to "refer out" the moment they realize a client’s struggles are rooted in deep-seated trauma that requires clinical intervention. Think of it like this: if you have a broken leg, you go to a surgeon (the therapist). If you want to run a marathon with a leg that’s already healed but feels weak, you hire a trainer (the coach).
The Wild West of Credentials
Here is the dirty secret of the industry: anyone can call themselves a life coach. Literally anyone. You could go change your Instagram bio right now and start charging $200 an hour. That’s why understanding life coaching what is it requires looking at the paperwork.
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The ICF and the Association for Coaching are the big players trying to bring some order to the chaos. They require hundreds of hours of supervised practice. They have ethical codes. They make sure coaches aren't just selling "vibes."
- ACC: Associate Certified Coach (100+ hours)
- PCC: Professional Certified Coach (500+ hours)
- MCC: Master Certified Coach (2,500+ hours)
If you're looking for help, look for those letters. Otherwise, you're just paying for a very expensive pep talk from a stranger.
Does This Stuff Actually Work?
You want numbers? We have some. A study by the ICF and PriceWaterhouseCoopers found that the vast majority of companies (around 86%) that used coaching saw a return on their investment. But for individuals, the "return" is harder to measure in dollars. It’s usually measured in time.
How much time do you spend procrastinating? How many years have you stayed in a job you hate because you didn't have a plan?
A 2019 study published in Frontiers in Psychology suggested that coaching can significantly reduce stress and increase "self-efficacy"—which is basically a fancy way of saying you start believing you can actually handle your own life. It’s not magic. It’s accountability. Most of us know what we need to do; we just don't do it because no one is watching. A coach is watching.
The Different Flavors of Coaching
It's not just "life" anymore. The industry has fractured into a million little niches.
Some people specialize in "Executive Coaching." This is for the CEOs who are brilliant at tech but terrible at talking to human beings. Then there’s "Wellness Coaching," which focuses on the intersection of food, movement, and mental clarity. You’ve even got "Relationship Coaches" who help couples navigate communication without necessarily doing the deep-dive psychological work of marriage counseling.
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There are even "Grief Coaches." This is a tricky area. They aren't there to treat the clinical depression that can come with loss, but to help a person figure out how to navigate their "new normal" and handle the logistics of a life that has been turned upside down.
The Dark Side of the Industry
Let's be real. There's a lot of fluff out there. You’ve probably seen the "Boss Babe" culture or the "Manifestation Coaches" who claim you can think your way to a million dollars.
That’s not coaching. That’s marketing.
Real life coaching is grounded in behavioral science and positive psychology. It uses tools like the "GROW" model (Goals, Reality, Options, Will) created by Sir John Whitmore. It’s structured. If a coach spends the whole time talking about themselves or promising you a "secret formula" for success, run the other way.
What a Typical Engagement Looks Like
Most people don’t hire a coach forever. It’s usually a three-month or six-month sprint. You meet once a week or every two weeks.
In the first session, you set a "Discovery" goal. By the end of our time together, what has to happen for you to feel this was worth the money? Then, you get to work. Each session ends with "homework." Maybe it’s making three uncomfortable phone calls. Maybe it’s tracking your time for a week to see where those four hours of TikTok scrolling are coming from.
The magic happens between the sessions, not during them.
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Life Coaching What Is It: The Actionable Reality
If you’re considering this, don't just jump at the first person with a nice website. You need to vet them like you’re hiring a high-level employee, because you are. You’re the CEO of your life, and you’re hiring a consultant.
Check the credentials.
Ask specifically if they are ICF certified or if they attended a program accredited by a major body. If they say "I’m self-taught," realize you’re taking a gamble.
Demand a chemistry call.
Most coaches offer a free 15-to-20-minute "vibe check." Use it. If you feel like they’re judging you or if they talk too much, they aren't the one. You need someone who makes you feel safe enough to be honest but challenged enough to grow.
Define your "One Big Thing."
Don't go into coaching with a vague goal like "I want to be happier." That’s too big. Try: "I want to establish a morning routine that allows me to start work without feeling frantic." Or: "I want to learn how to set boundaries with my overbearing manager."
Prepare for the "Dip."
There is a point in the coaching process—usually around week four—where it stops being fun and starts being hard. You’ll want to cancel. You’ll feel like it’s not working. That’s usually exactly when the breakthrough is about to happen.
Coaching isn't a silver bullet. It’s a mirror. It shows you the habits, excuses, and fears you’ve been ignoring. If you’re ready to actually look in that mirror and do something about what you see, it can change everything. If you’re just looking for someone to tell you you’re doing great, save your money and call a friend.
Start by auditing your own resistance. Write down the one goal you've been "meaning to get to" for the last six months. Then, list the top three excuses you use to avoid it. If those excuses feel like iron-clad facts, you might just need a coach to show you they're actually just choices.