Wait. Stop. Before we go any further, let's clear the air on a massive, decades-long piece of pop culture confusion. If you’ve spent the last twenty years searching for the "gay Backstreet Boy," you are almost certainly thinking of Lance Bass. But here’s the kicker: Lance Bass was in *NSYNC.
It’s a funny thing how the human brain works. In the late 90s and early 2000s, the boy band rivalry was so fierce that the two groups basically fused into one giant, frosted-tipped entity in the public imagination. When Lance Bass came out on the cover of People magazine in 2006, it was a seismic shift for boy bands everywhere. But the gay Backstreet Boy search query persists because, for a long time, people just assumed there had to be one in BSB, too.
The reality? Every single member of the Backstreet Boys—Nick Carter, AJ McLean, Kevin Richardson, Brian Littrell, and Howie Dorough—is heterosexual and has been married to a woman.
Why the World Kept Searching for a Gay Backstreet Boy
Pop culture in the 90s was a different beast. It was a time of "don't ask, don't tell," not just in the military, but in the music industry. Labels were terrified that if a heartthrob came out, the record sales would vanish overnight. They thought teenage girls wouldn't buy posters of a guy who wouldn't want to date them. Honestly, it was a pretty cynical way to look at fans.
Because of that environment, rumors followed almost every boy band member who didn't fit a specific "bad boy" or "jock" archetype. In the Backstreet Boys, those rumors often circled around Howie Dorough or Kevin Richardson, simply because they were more private or had a different "vibe" than the others. But it was all baseless speculation.
The search for a gay Backstreet Boy actually says more about our collective obsession with boy band dynamics than it does about the singers themselves. We wanted a narrative of "the secret," and when Lance Bass finally broke that glass ceiling, the public immediately looked at the Backstreet Boys and asked, "Okay, who's next?"
The Lance Bass Effect and the Boy Band Crossover
Lance’s coming out was a blueprint. He famously said, "The thing is, I’m not ashamed – that’s the thing I want to say the most. I don’t think it’s wrong, I’m not devastated going through this."
When that happened, the Backstreet Boys were incredibly supportive. They didn't distance themselves. In fact, AJ McLean has been one of the most vocal allies in the industry for years. AJ has often experimented with "gender-bending" fashion, wearing nail polish, makeup, and tutus long before it was "cool" for straight men to do so in mainstream pop. This comfort with femininity and queer aesthetics often confused casual observers, leading them to search for a gay Backstreet Boy when, in reality, they were just seeing a straight man who didn't care about traditional masculine norms.
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The AJ McLean Misconception
If you look at the Google trends, AJ’s name pops up frequently alongside the queer rumors. Why? Because AJ has always been the "rebel" of the group. He’s been open about his struggles with addiction, his love for drag—he even performed in drag for a "RuPaul’s Drag Race" inspired event—and his general flamboyance.
But AJ has been married to Rochelle DeAnna McLean since 2011 (though they announced a separation in 2023). He’s a father. He’s just a guy who happens to love the LGBTQ+ community and isn't afraid to show it. In 2022, he even told Fashion Magazine that he’s always felt a connection to the queer community because he felt like an outsider himself.
"I’ve always been a fan of drag," AJ said. "I’ve always been a fan of the flamboyant, the over-the-top."
That kind of honesty is great, but it often gets twisted by the internet's need to categorize people. People see a guy in heels and immediately think they’ve found their gay Backstreet Boy.
What About the "Sixth" Backstreet Boys?
There’s another layer to this. Some people remember "gay" members associated with the group who weren't actually in the final lineup. Lou Pearlman, the man who created both the Backstreet Boys and *NSYNC, was a complicated and predatory figure.
Pearlman was gay, and after his massive Ponzi scheme collapsed and he went to prison, many dark stories came out. In the documentary The Boy Band Con: The Lou Pearlman Story, several former boy band members (from various groups Lou managed) spoke about the uncomfortable and sometimes abusive environment Lou created. While this didn't make the Backstreet Boys themselves gay, the proximity to a powerful, closeted man in a position of authority added a layer of complexity to the group's history that people still try to untangle today.
Why Representation Still Matters in the Boy Band World
You might wonder why people still care in 2026. Does it matter if there's a gay Backstreet Boy?
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It matters because for a generation of queer kids growing up in the 90s, these five guys were the pinnacle of what "cool" looked like. Seeing yourself reflected in that kind of stardom is powerful. While the Backstreet Boys are all straight, they’ve become massive icons in the gay community. Their music is a staple at Pride events. Their choreography is legendary in gay clubs.
They’ve embraced this. They don't shy away from it.
The Evolution of the Boy Band Archetype
Today, we have artists like Lil Nas X, Troye Sivan, or even the way Harry Styles (though not a "boy band" member anymore) plays with identity. The world is different now. If the Backstreet Boys were forming today, a member being openly gay wouldn't just be "accepted"—it would be celebrated as a point of authenticity.
The search for the gay Backstreet Boy is essentially a ghost of the past. It’s a remnant of a time when we expected celebrities to have secrets.
Factual Breakdown: The Current Status of the Members
Let's just look at the facts. No fluff.
- Nick Carter: Married to Lauren Kitt since 2014. Three children.
- AJ McLean: Married to Rochelle McLean (separated). Two children.
- Kevin Richardson: Married to Kristin Willits since 2000. Two children.
- Brian Littrell: Married to Leighanne Wallace since 2000. One son (Baylee, who is also a singer).
- Howie Dorough: Married to Leigh Boniello since 2007. Two children.
There is no "secret" member. There is no one "hiding." They are five guys who have grown up in the spotlight and have been remarkably consistent about who they are.
Actionable Insights for Fans and Researchers
If you're looking into this because you're interested in the history of queer representation in music, here’s how to actually find the information you need without falling into the "rumor mill" trap.
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*1. Distinguish between NSYNC and BSB. If you are looking for the "member who came out," you are looking for Lance Bass. He is the pioneer in this space for 90s boy bands. His book, Out of Sync, is a great resource for understanding what it was like to be a closeted pop star at the height of the boy band craze.
2. Look at Allyship, Not Identity. Instead of searching for a gay Backstreet Boy, look at how the group supports the community. They have performed at numerous GLAAD events and have consistently spoken out in favor of marriage equality. This is a much more productive way to view their legacy.
3. Study the Lou Pearlman History. If you're interested in the "dark side" of the industry, watch the The Boy Band Con. It explains the power dynamics that led to many of the rumors that plagued these groups for years. It’s a sobering look at how young men were exploited in the industry.
4. Check Official Sources. In 2026, celebrities are more vocal than ever on social media. If one of the Backstreet Boys were to come out as gay or bisexual, it wouldn't be a "leak" on a forum; it would be a post on their official Instagram or a sit-down interview with a major outlet.
The search for the gay Backstreet Boy is a fascinating look at how we project our desires and curiosities onto celebrities. While the answer is that none of them are gay, the group's relationship with their LGBTQ+ fans remains one of the strongest and most respectful in pop music history.
To move forward, stop looking for a "secret" and start looking at the real impact these five men have had on pop culture—and the way they've stood by their fans, no matter who those fans love. This is the end of the speculation. The "gay Backstreet Boy" doesn't exist, but a legacy of inclusion certainly does.
Next Steps for Your Research:
- Verify Membership: If you're writing or researching, always double-check the group roster. The "Big Three" of the era (BSB, *NSYNC, 98 Degrees) are often confused.
- Consult Documentaries: Watch Show 'Em What You're Made Of (2015) for an intimate look at the Backstreet Boys' real lives and family dynamics.
- Monitor Official Channels: Follow the individual members on verified platforms to see their current advocacy work and personal updates directly from the source.