Joy Behar doesn't do anything by the book. Whether she's sparking a heated debate on The View or cracking a joke that pushes the envelope, she has always played by her own rules. That includes her love life. Most people find "the one" and head to the altar within a few years. Not Joy.
She waited nearly three decades.
Joy Behar and husband Steve Janowitz have a story that sounds like a romantic comedy script written by someone who hates romantic comedies. It’s long, it’s funny, and honestly, it’s a bit weird. They met in the early 1980s, right around the time Joy was navigating a divorce and a career shift. But they didn't get married until 2011. Why the massive delay? It turns out Joy had some very specific, and very hilarious, reasons for keeping him as her "spousal equivalent" for 29 years.
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How a Nudist Colony Started It All
You can’t make this up. Joy actually met Steve Janowitz at a semi-nudist colony in the 80s. She’s joked about it on The View plenty of times, clarifying that while he was naked when she first spotted him, she was definitely not. "For a man to see me naked, I have to be in his will," she famously quipped.
They were at a resort, and she saw him from across the way during the day. Later that night, when everyone had their clothes back on for a movie screening, she recognized him. They hit it off. Steve, a middle school teacher, was the quiet counterpoint to Joy's loud, Brooklyn-bred energy. He wasn't looking for the spotlight, which is probably why they lasted.
The First Marriage Factor
To understand why Joy was so hesitant to marry Steve, you have to look back at her first husband, Joe Behar. They were married from 1965 to 1981. Joe was a big deal in TV too—he was a director for General Hospital and Days of Our Lives.
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They had a daughter, Eve, but the marriage eventually hit an "expiration date," as Joy puts it. The divorce left her wary. She didn't see the rush to jump back into a legal contract when she was already perfectly happy living her life.
Why 29 Years?
By 2009, fans thought it was finally happening. Joy announced an engagement. Then, she got cold feet and called the whole thing off three months later. She just wasn't feeling the pressure of the "big white wedding" or the legal entanglement.
There were two main reasons she finally caved in 2011:
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- The In-Law Situation: Joy has joked that she waited until all the parents were gone. "I waited until all the parents were dead," she told Rachael Ray. "So I have no in-laws at all." No lasagna dinners, no awkward holiday visits. Just the two of them.
- Legal Rights and Social Change: The legalization of same-sex marriage in New York actually played a role. It made her think about the legal protections marriage provides. As she got older, she realized that having "spousal equivalent" status didn't mean much in a hospital room or a lawyer's office.
They finally tied the knot in a private New York City ceremony on August 11, 2011.
Life as Mr. and Mrs. Janowitz
Steve is basically the ultimate supportive husband. He stays in the background while Joy takes the hits on daytime TV. While Joy was an English teacher before her comedy career took off, Steve spent his career teaching middle school math. They share a home in the Hamptons and a Shih-Tzu named Bernie.
Kinda makes sense, doesn't it? A math teacher and an English teacher finding a balance over thirty-plus years. He’s the one who helps her with her "technical support" and stays protective of her when the internet gets mean.
What We Can Learn From Them
Most celebrity marriages burn out in six months. Joy and Steve waited 29 years just to start the clock. Their relationship works because it wasn't built on a rush to the altar. It was built on a long-term friendship and a shared sense of humor.
- Don't rush the "official" status: If it works, it works. A piece of paper doesn't change the daily reality of a relationship.
- Find your opposite: Joy is loud; Steve is quiet. This "odd couple" dynamic keeps things from getting too volatile.
- Wait for the right reasons: Whether it’s legal protection or just being "tired of waiting for Wolf Blitzer to ask," make sure you're doing it for yourself, not the audience.
If you’re looking to strengthen your own long-term partnership, maybe take a page out of Joy's book. Focus on the companionship first and the ceremony... well, maybe wait a decade or two. It seemed to work for her.
For those curious about how Joy maintains her energy at 83, looking into her Mediterranean-inspired diet and her frequent walks in the Hamptons provides a glimpse into her longevity. Staying active and keeping a sharp sense of humor are the two biggest factors in her "happily ever after."