If you’ve seen the movie Apollo 13, you probably think you know the story of Jim Lovell and his wife, Marilyn. You remember Tom Hanks and Kathleen Quinlan. You remember the lost wedding ring in the shower and the "squawk box" in the kitchen.
But Hollywood usually buffs out the rough edges. It makes things look a little too shiny. Honestly, the real story of Jim Lovell and wife Marilyn is way more interesting than a two-hour flick. It wasn’t just a high-stakes space rescue; it was a 71-year masterclass in how to stay married when your husband’s job involves a 1-in-10 chance of never coming home.
Sadly, both are gone now. Marilyn passed away in August 2023 at the age of 93. Jim followed her just two years later, in August 2025, at the age of 97. They basically spent nearly three-quarters of a century together. That doesn't happen by accident, especially in the "divorce-heavy" culture of the early space program.
The High School Sweethearts Nobody Saw Coming
They met at Juneau High School in Milwaukee. Jim was a bit of a geek for rockets even then. Marilyn Lillie Gerlach was the "prettiest girl in Wisconsin," or so Jim liked to tell anyone who would listen.
Most people don't realize how much Marilyn sacrificed early on. When Jim went to the U.S. Naval Academy in Annapolis, she didn't just wait for him. She transferred from Wisconsin State Teachers College to George Washington University just to be closer.
They got married on June 6, 1952. It happened just hours after his graduation. Talk about a whirlwind.
The Astronaut Wives Club was No Joke
Being an "Astronaut Wife" sounds glamorous in retrospect. It wasn't. It was sort of a high-pressure sorority where you were expected to be perfect for the cameras while your husband was halfway to the moon.
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Marilyn was part of the "Next Nine"—the second group of wives. She once had to go console the wife of Elliot See after he died in a plane crash. That was the reality. You’d be drinking coffee with a friend one day, and the next, you’d be helping her pick out a burial suit.
When Apollo 13 happened, the world saw Marilyn as the stoic face of the mission. Behind the scenes? She was listening to that "squawk box" in their home in Timber Cove, Texas. It was a one-way radio. She could hear the panic in the controllers' voices, but she couldn't talk back.
What the Movie Got Right (and Wrong)
You remember that scene where Marilyn loses her wedding ring down the drain?
- Fact: That actually happened. She saw it as a bad omen before the launch.
- Fiction: The movie portrays her as almost constantly on the verge of a breakdown. In reality, friends said she was the "rock" of the neighborhood.
- The "Man in the Moon": This is the coolest detail. For Christmas in 1968, while Jim was orbiting the moon on Apollo 8, a package showed up for Marilyn. It was a mink coat with a note: "To Marilyn from the Man in the Moon."
The Family Legacy
Jim and Marilyn had four kids: Barbara, James, Susan, and Jeffrey.
Living in the shadow of a national hero isn't easy for kids. But by all accounts, the Lovells kept it surprisingly grounded. After Jim retired from the Navy and NASA in 1973, they didn't just disappear into the sunset. They moved to Lake Forest, Illinois. Jim got into the business world, and they eventually opened a restaurant called "Lovells of Lake Forest."
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Their son, James Lovell III, actually ran the kitchen for years. It became a local landmark, filled with space memorabilia, though it eventually closed in 2015 so the family could finally retire for real.
Why Their Marriage Survived When Others Didn't
Look at the Mercury Seven or the Apollo crews. The divorce rates were staggering. The "Space Race" was a meat grinder for relationships.
So why did Jim Lovell and wife Marilyn make it to 71 years?
- Mutual Respect: Jim never treated her like "just" a housewife. He knew he couldn't do his job if she wasn't running the "Ground Control" at home.
- The "Mount Marilyn" Factor: During the Apollo 8 mission, Jim actually named a mountain on the moon after her. Most guys give flowers; Jim gave her a lunar landmark.
- Humor: Even in his 90s, Jim would joke that he only came back from Apollo 13 because he knew Marilyn would be mad if he didn't.
Actionable Lessons from the Lovell Legacy
If you're looking for the "secret sauce" of their relationship, it wasn't about the fame. It was about the transition.
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Prioritize the "After": Many couples fail because they focus on the "mission" (the career, the kids) and forget to plan for what happens when the mission ends. The Lovells successfully transitioned from the high-octane NASA years to a quiet life in Illinois by building a business together.
Communication is a Two-Way Street: Even when Jim was literally in another world, he found ways to make her feel included—like that "Man in the Moon" gift. In any long-distance or high-stress situation, small, symbolic gestures carry more weight than grand speeches.
Acknowledge the Support Crew: No one gets to the moon alone. Jim was always the first to admit that Marilyn’s job was, in many ways, harder than his. He had the controls; she only had the silence.
If you want to dive deeper into their personal history, check out Jim's book Lost Moon. It’s the basis for the movie, but the prose gives much more insight into the internal life of the Lovell household during those four days of cold and dark in space.