AuthorTopic: A Bird, of Unparalleled Evocative Power (WIP)  (Read 7097 times)

Offline 7321551

  • 0010
  • *
  • Posts: 121
  • Karma: +1/-0
  • a.k.a. Jarrad
    • View Profile

A Bird, of Unparalleled Evocative Power (WIP)

on: December 26, 2009, 03:10:53 am
Hi there. Here's a bird that could benefit from criticism.
I began by using a gray-scale ramp:

I then added hue & saturation:

I subsequently noticed that he looks vaguely derivative of the Yus Bird... Subconscious fan-art?
I chose reds for the body's shadows, which is a little counter-intuitive, so I'm interested in what people make of that.  The beak is almost yellow-green, which seems to give it an almost fluorescent appearance.
Radical character-criticism, such as "his head's too tiny", "his beak's too big", etc. is also cool. I'm not devoted to this design.
NEXT: Wings. & perhaps a hat.

Offline twodayslate

  • 0001
  • *
  • Posts: 77
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
    • twitter

Re: A Bird, of Unparalleled Evocative Power (WIP)

Reply #1 on: December 26, 2009, 04:07:12 am
Well so far I am loving it :)

Offline Smash

  • 0001
  • *
  • Posts: 36
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile

Re: A Bird, of Unparalleled Evocative Power (WIP)

Reply #2 on: December 26, 2009, 06:21:49 am
Hmm.. Nice so far.

There's small AA irregularities tho, but not too relevant. Just try to make the AA not blend too much with the BG; this is to make the object recognizable in the space given, instead of looking joined to it or so. (Belly only, I think.)

Offline WM

  • 0010
  • *
  • Posts: 134
  • Karma: +0/-0
  • cubist
    • View Profile

Re: A Bird, of Unparalleled Evocative Power (WIP)

Reply #3 on: December 26, 2009, 07:14:54 am
...
I chose reds for the body's shadows, which is a little counter-intuitive, so I'm interested in what people make of that. 
...


I read it as an effect of he feathers; it really works hand-in-hand with the subject matter.

I'm loving this;  it has a strikingly-interesting element to it.

My only advice is don't overwork it. The simplicity really works for this piece.

And maybe some of that more saturated yellow (like that on the darker foot) to balance out that washed-out yellow on the lighter foot; just a smidge along the left side (our left) would do it.

Offline 7321551

  • 0010
  • *
  • Posts: 121
  • Karma: +1/-0
  • a.k.a. Jarrad
    • View Profile

Re: A Bird, of Unparalleled Evocative Power (WIP)

Reply #4 on: December 27, 2009, 12:32:03 am
Well so far I am loving it :)
Thankyou.

Hmm.. Nice so far.

There's small AA irregularities tho, but not too relevant. Just try to make the AA not blend too much with the BG; this is to make the object recognizable in the space given, instead of looking joined to it or so. (Belly only, I think.)
You're right. I've changed the torso AA - it is now 1px high rather than 2px, which I believe is what was blending him into the background.

My only advice is don't overwork it. The simplicity really works for this piece.
I agree.

And maybe some of that more saturated yellow (like that on the darker foot) to balance out that washed-out yellow on the lighter foot; just a smidge along the left side (our left) would do it.
I did this, and additionally modified the palette so that the yellow appears less washed-out (well... less green).

I also added wings & tail.


I'm probably going to work on some different stances and angles for this character, but first I'd like to add some personality or distinctive trait. He currently seems rather generic. I'll probably just add a hat but it seems like a bit of a cop-out.

Offline twodayslate

  • 0001
  • *
  • Posts: 77
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
    • twitter

Re: A Bird, of Unparalleled Evocative Power (WIP)

Reply #5 on: December 27, 2009, 11:36:44 pm
Aw. I expected bigger wings. Disappointed :P

The tail blends into the stomach a bit too much. Add feathers?

Offline Malor

  • 0011
  • **
  • Posts: 527
  • Karma: +0/-0
  • Masquerading as a black bear.
    • View Profile

Re: A Bird, of Unparalleled Evocative Power (WIP)

Reply #6 on: December 28, 2009, 05:40:53 pm
Yeah I second that, I think you could emphasize the wings a lot more, which would help give it some character. Also, the birds head looks a little disconnected from the body, I'd add a little.. substance to the neck.
Quote from: Adarias
I'm not going to pretend this is a small task either; certainly none of us here can claim to have accomplished it.  it's the realm of masters.  still, it's what we all have to try for.

Offline 7321551

  • 0010
  • *
  • Posts: 121
  • Karma: +1/-0
  • a.k.a. Jarrad
    • View Profile

Re: A Bird, of Unparalleled Evocative Power (WIP)

Reply #7 on: December 29, 2009, 01:16:26 am
Yeah, I opted for small wings so I wouldn't lose the clean outline, but I'll definitely embiggen them now. & add some plumage to the chest/neck area. & something else interesting.
Next post will be an update.

Offline ndchristie

  • 0100
  • ***
  • Posts: 2426
  • Karma: +2/-0
    • View Profile

Re: A Bird, of Unparalleled Evocative Power (WIP)

Reply #8 on: December 29, 2009, 04:47:05 am
Hmm, maybe I'm missing something in the title, but what exactly is this character evoking?
A mistake is a mistake.
The same mistake twice is a bad habit.
The same mistake three or more times is a motif.

Offline Xion

  • 0100
  • ***
  • Posts: 1551
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
    • FourbitFriday

Re: A Bird, of Unparalleled Evocative Power (WIP)

Reply #9 on: December 29, 2009, 06:10:00 am
unparallelity, of course.
I think the tailfeathers might be more noticeable and in character with the aloof air this creature exhudes if they were pointing upwards and/or outwards rather than downwards.