AuthorTopic: heartless doll (noob first post X3)  (Read 3548 times)

Offline Gotedifuoco

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heartless doll (noob first post X3)

on: November 27, 2009, 08:06:53 pm


hhmm hi guys, first post here, i thought i should upload this thing i did recently. I'm kind of embarassed to show it considering the quality of the works that get usually posted here, but i'd like some pointers/crit/comments? i think it's not very readable and i have some issues with the palette..i don't know why but i never get to obtain those awesome color contrasts most professional pixel artists create.. so i dunno , help ? :-[

Offline McClaneGames

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Re: heartless doll (noob first post X3)

Reply #1 on: November 27, 2009, 09:01:10 pm
First off, don't say that this is "no0bish," because it's some quality artwork!
The rain? looks a bit weird, and there are a few readability issues, but keep up the good work!

Offline QuaziGNRLnose

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Re: heartless doll (noob first post X3)

Reply #2 on: November 28, 2009, 12:59:58 am
i don't see how you could call this noobish? surely your self esteem isn't that low!

overall the piece is great, but it has alot of things to be nitpicked on

the composition is ok, but mega man is in a weird offset position in the frame for the angle hes facing (he should probably be all the way on the left instead of the right) and doesn't really draw the viewers attention, even though hes the subject of the picture.

also mega-mans contrast with the background isnt too high so hes a bit hard to make out, which also steals the viewers attention away.
The sky is weirdly well lit. it would probably look much nicer as a dark sky. not to mention the sky looks very rough and unfinished!

the rain looks strange and only seems to be in some spots, not throughout the entire frame like rain would be.

alot of the shading/rendering/forms in places just seem lazy and unrefined, ex the wet cloth(?) on mega man looks flat.
also the cannon arm is not very elliptic it more like a potato shape. the V on his helmet is very rough, and there are quite a few anatomical problems with his body.

theres a lot of other stuff i didn't mention but those are minor or i probably didn't notice them.
Originally posted by Jeff

I AM A GIANT DONUT MANATEE

Offline CrazyMLC

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Re: heartless doll (noob first post X3)

Reply #3 on: November 28, 2009, 01:14:32 am
It doesn't look like its raining on the city, but its raining on Megaman. Very odd.
It cant be the inside of the building, is it supposed to be a reflection off the window? If so, where is the back of megaman?

Offline Gotedifuoco

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Re: heartless doll (noob first post X3)

Reply #4 on: November 28, 2009, 01:13:30 pm
mclane- thanks..! i just think it has a strong unprofessional vibe to it(not to mention all the errors that have been pointed out),that's why i feel it's kind of noobish XD

quazignrlmose-
wow, thanks for the in depth critique !
unfortunately i'm really random when it comes to composition and i'm always conditioned by what i like to show, in this case putting megaman on the right would've covered the building and part of the window, a couple of things i really wanted to work on.. but i understand the problem here, i'll try to fix it if i manage to do it without redoing the whole pic

mmm and i thought megaman was TOO contrasted! hah..you mean i should give him brighter lights and darker shadows? for the sky.. i think i kind of failed at rendering the effect of those low clouds that gets illuminated by the city below..i'll try to rework that and see if making it darker and more polished works

i wasn't sure about the rain.. i noticed that at night you only see rain when it gets near to a source of light..but giving the fact it doesn't really look like night  i could just put it everywhere in the pic

for his forms..i'm not sure what anatomical problems it has, but i've always sucked at it, so i'll try to adjust it too.. though he has a bit differences from normal humans anatomy, the arms and legs are kind of detatched from his body ,i wanted to give him an "aegis from persona 3" look ( http://www.dokuganryu.com/scans/megaten/p3/07.jpg  ) only more accentuated. i'll try to fix the rest of the problems with shapes too.

crazymlc- mm well it IS the inside of a roofless building ........ whoa , you know now that you make me think of it it would work way better if he was like in front of a building's windows and the city behind him was a reflection,, i'll add megaman's refletction . Thanks for the idea XD

Offline QuaziGNRLnose

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Re: heartless doll (noob first post X3)

Reply #5 on: November 28, 2009, 05:01:53 pm
by contrast i mean with the background, megamans mostly dark on his outer limits, and so is the background around him, so either brighten up megaman, or darken everything in the background so that he has a more visible edge, right now his outer edges just kind of blend in with the background because hes a similar colour (teal) making it hard to read. id suggest using maybe the dark purples instead.

remember my crits arent for serious problems, its just when you have a good piece id imagine the artist rather get ways to make it even better than getting "thats so nice" comments.

as for his joints, i wasn't sure if you were going for a disjointed look, but even then his limbs aren't very correct. its the worst near the waist. the leg behind him seems to be lower than the leg in front, when they should be at the same height, and his "waist piece" is a strange shape which doesn't really read as a symmetrical form.
Originally posted by Jeff

I AM A GIANT DONUT MANATEE

Offline Manupix

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Re: heartless doll (noob first post X3)

Reply #6 on: December 01, 2009, 11:18:45 pm
An amazing image! Very reminiscent of Blade Runner.


The idea of the roofless building is not at all obvious, I wondered about rain inside + outside, read the posts carefully, and only then saw the missing glass.
The remaining glass should be dirty (that's what you did on the left?) so as to be more visible; just lightening tones behind it would do, I think.
The rain drops on the glass work quite well, instant recognition there.

Rain and sky: not a big issue in my opinion, the sky might darken a little, don't lose the subdued pastel feel in this background. I agree rain is mostly visible around light sources, you might have a little more though, kind of soft.

The main issue for me is the light on megaman. There is conflicting information:
- he looks brightly lit from a source to the right, almost horizontal;
- the shadow behind him is cast by a much higher source, that only lits him up to his legs, and doesn't touch at all the windowpane;
- the rain bouncing on him is lit from above behind.
- he's on a decrepit building top floor where one doesn't expect a lot of light.
Tough choice...

I'd suggest to make him (and mostly his face) darker, in some mysterious half-shadow, it will fit the atmosphere best, and he will be more visible against the soft bg. Keep raindrops if possible.

That orange thing just behind his head is a distraction, too.

Offline EyeCraft

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Re: heartless doll (noob first post X3)

Reply #7 on: December 02, 2009, 02:13:57 am
Quite a big piece! Got some very nice elements to it.

Unfortunately, I think it's more of a case of a bunch of things that are great on their own, but don't mesh when combined. The colours and levels you have on the city background are great, but they don't work in harmony with the overall setting. I feel like there should be way more diffusion of light because of the rain, which would really soften the background, and harmonise the colours a lot more.

QuasiGNRLnose is right about the contrast and priority of the elements in the image. The eye jumps immediately to the orange buildings. They're bright, and they're warm in an otherwise cool piece.

I think you might need to think differently about how you approach constructing your pieces. It seems like you decided you wanted a bunch of things in the picture, and then dropped them in there and rendered them all with equal detail. Everything has equal focus and clarity. You need to pick what your focal points are in the image, prioritise and emphasise them, and play the rest down. Are the orange buildings a focal point? Is the stormy city skyline one? The individual rain drops?

My advice is to just elect Megaman as the focal point, then use strong aerial perspective and diffusion to play the other elements down. You can communicate exactly what you are now in a much more implicit, rather than explicit manner.

As for pixelling, there's numerous jaggies around the place, particularly on the sharp edges of Megaman. You have numerous contact points between highlight and deep shadow that could really benefit from AA.

Try not to be too hard on yourself either, eh? ;)