AuthorTopic: Dreadnought  (Read 8532 times)

Offline Opacus

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Dreadnought

on: July 13, 2009, 09:53:31 pm
I think this has come far enough to start asking for some critique now.
It's a Dreadnought from the Warhammer universe. I don't play the tabletop game, I do love the Dawn of War RTS games though.
Currently enjoying both 1 and 2.

Anyway, this is it:


It's a pretty ambitious piece, as it is rather large. I hope I can finish this though as I really like it.
There are 15 colours so far. I've used a number of references. The Dreadnought in Dawn of War (You can give it a complete 360 turn in the menu, very handy. You can only twist it horizontaly though)
This image was also a prominent reference.
http://warhammer.hardwired.hu/gallery/wh40k/40k_011.jpg

And furthermore some of the actual models from the games workshop site, and some other drawings.

There are still alot of placeholders. Obviously the surroundings are far from done. And the flash coming from the Dreadnought's gun is also a placeholder.
Some critique would be apreciated.

(I haven't given up on the Jellyfish yet. I just need to come up with some briliant idea for the background.)

Offline ptoing

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Re: Dreadnought

Reply #1 on: July 14, 2009, 12:25:37 am
I think if you made the image a bit bigger and gave him something to interact with it would be way cooler.
Give him some room to breathe and some orcs or something to shoot at.

Otherwise nice so far.
There are no ugly colours, only ugly combinations of colours.

Offline Ian

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Re: Dreadnought

Reply #2 on: July 14, 2009, 01:59:59 am
Might be a good idea to try pushing the bottom left (our right)  side of his torso and leg a bit back into space to let the arm on that side pop forward a little more.  Right now I'm immediately drawn to that part of the robot despite it being farther from me than any other part of the robot (this is probably because there is a huge range of values on that one leg).  Your reference does a really nice job of leaving the leg as a flat silhouette which works wonderfully.

Anyway, it looks really great so far and that's just a very small idea you might want to play around with.

Offline ndchristie

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Re: Dreadnought

Reply #3 on: July 14, 2009, 04:45:21 am
It's a Dreadnought from the Warhammer universe. I don't play the tabletop game, I do love the Dawn of War RTS games though.

you really should play the games, or at least read the backstory dedicated to them.  I know that doesn't sound like much of a crit, but hear me out:

your dreadnought right now is COMPLETELY lifeless.  The dreadnought in the game is the ultimate piece of reverence on the battlefield.  It is a walking reliquary, the sarcophagus of a nearly-destroyed brother in arms.  the dreadnought outranks even the chaptermaster in his outfit, and often houses the body of a former chapter-master.  they have seen the brutality of chaos at it's utmost, and survived it with their honor and soul intact.  they represent the most pious and venerable warriors of the imperium, beyond even the Inquisition and examination of the daemonhunters.  this guy, on the other hand, just looks like a kinda dopey suit of armor with a flamethrower on his hand.
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Offline circuscommando

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Re: Dreadnought

Reply #4 on: July 14, 2009, 05:56:51 am
I love Warhammer 40k, dreadnoughts are pretty damn sweet (have you seen the Witch hunter dreadnought?) something i would add (perhaps later) is shots coming back from the intended target of the dreadnought.
he hobbles and hobbles.

Offline ndchristie

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Re: Dreadnought

Reply #5 on: July 14, 2009, 07:04:11 am
penitent engine :P.  It's greatly different from a dreadnought in that the incarcerated is placed within not as a means of preserving life, but as a means of hastening death.  It is also used by the sisters of battle and therefor not a proper witch hunter unit (although fielded in many witch hunter armies).  The sisters of the the adepta soroitas have a relationship to the ordo hereticus (witch hunters) similar to that between the daemon hunters (ordo malleus) and the grey knights space marine chapter.

the backstory, while incredibly nerdy, is an absolute necessity in making striking/accurate depictions of the characters involved.
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Offline Opacus

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Re: Dreadnought

Reply #6 on: July 14, 2009, 09:12:32 am
It's a Dreadnought from the Warhammer universe. I don't play the tabletop game, I do love the Dawn of War RTS games though.

you really should play the games, or at least read the backstory dedicated to them.  I know that doesn't sound like much of a crit, but hear me out:

your dreadnought right now is COMPLETELY lifeless.  The dreadnought in the game is the ultimate piece of reverence on the battlefield.  It is a walking reliquary, the sarcophagus of a nearly-destroyed brother in arms.  the dreadnought outranks even the chaptermaster in his outfit, and often houses the body of a former chapter-master.  they have seen the brutality of chaos at it's utmost, and survived it with their honor and soul intact.  they represent the most pious and venerable warriors of the imperium, beyond even the Inquisition and examination of the daemonhunters.  this guy, on the other hand, just looks like a kinda dopey suit of armor with a flamethrower on his hand.

I DO know the backstories Nd. And I do know that the Dreadnought is a walking sarcophagus that houses a very important fallen champion that has been revived so it may serve the empire once again.
However, as far as I know, Dreadnoughts just ARE very lifeless. They talk slowly and heavily. They walk slowly. They turn slowly. And the only thing they can really do is wreak havoc on the battlefield. They've basicly just become robots.

The one in my drawing is on a distance from the enemy, shooting them with his chaingun, and maybe he's slowly closing in to grab some orcs and crush some bones. I really wouldn't know how to add more life to a wallking sarcophagus. I don't really understand what you'd want me to do with him.

Ptoing; yeah that might be a good idea. I'll probably move him back a bit. Give hime some orcs to shoot. Probably more than one. And maybe a few more on the background.

And Ian: I'll give that some thought.

Here's the most recent one:


EDIT: Here's a darker one. Which do you prefer?


I gave him a dead orc in his claws for more 'interaction'. And of course to make him seem a bit more menacing.
« Last Edit: July 14, 2009, 02:36:22 pm by Opacus »

Offline ndchristie

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Re: Dreadnought

Reply #7 on: July 14, 2009, 06:34:20 pm
That's more relic's take on them and it's rather boring as I think unfortunately you're finding.

more interesting is going to the actual source, this website compiled primarily from old rules books, codices and other official material : http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Space_Marine_Dreadnought.  Most importantly the lines about being quick and agile and some having a memory spanning even before the Heresy (i.e. vaster even than most librarians, who can only reach as far back as their living brethren, and not at all "just a robot").  I mean, certain dreadnoughts can make 4 close combat attacks in the same time it takes a normal warrior to swing his sword once!  That's not slow.

If you're devoted to the relic-style dull dreadnought though, I suggest taking a much more interesting view of things (literally, it's the camera i'm talking about).  A space marine in full armor + artificer's skeleton is about 9 feet tall, a straight-standing orc boy about 10-11 (though they always slouch), a dreadnought about 18-20 (the equivalent of looking out a two-story window).  You're looking at him straight-on, which is greatly diminishing his presence.  That orc looks like a teddy-bear, when even a dead one should be horrifyingly large.  The orc is also much too small compared to the dreadnought.  Still, he doesn't really need a sweeping shot to make things more interesting, he needs a dynamic shot which shows his size and strength.

for instance:

This has very close action, doesn't really show off the dreadnought's agility,yet it's far more dynamic.  Oh, and Ultramarines 2nd Company pwns mad Blood Raven noobs.
« Last Edit: July 14, 2009, 06:44:08 pm by ndchristie »
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Offline Opacus

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Re: Dreadnought

Reply #8 on: July 14, 2009, 06:52:34 pm
Haha. I do have a few Space Marines, they're Dark Templars though. (I'm not really aiming at any chapter with this one though. Which explains the lack of chapter marks)

Though I get your point Nd, I'm not about to scrap the entire piece and start completely anew. I do honestly like it this way.
I can understand you would want him to look more dynamic. But I like the slow relic Dreadnought. The slow aproach, his stomping, it makes him all the more badass.
You really get the idea there's a building walking towards you. Which is pretty intimidating. Now I do see where a very fast version of a Dreadnought would be more deadly and more efficient.
But I like him the slow way. I do agree that a different angle might benefit the piece. (A lower view for example could help empathise that big, bulky posture of his) But it's come too far to change that. I just don't think it's worth scrapping the entire thing for.

You say an Orc is about 10 feet, and a Dreadnought 20. When I picture the held orc upright he does seem that tall to me.
Maybe it's his posture that's making him look small. I'll work on that.

Here's a small update with the orc atleast having a less teddybear face.

Offline ndchristie

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Re: Dreadnought

Reply #9 on: July 14, 2009, 07:09:52 pm
Haha. I do have a few Space Marines, they're Dark Templars though. (I'm not really aiming at any chapter with this one though. Which explains the lack of chapter marks)

I just assumed blood ravens because of the relic references and the fact that he's clearly not blood angels.

Though I get your point Nd, I'm not about to scrap the entire piece and start completely anew. I do honestly like it this way.
Fair enough.  I was thinking this piece was still very much in the sketching phase of things.  I don't know how much it serves to plow ahead on a piece with a static composition but you're obviously free to.

You say an Orc is about 10 feet, and a Dreadnought 20. When I picture the held orc upright he does seem that tall to me.
Maybe it's his posture that's making him look small. I'll work on that.
Datz coz Rellack tinks da boyz iz puny, like deyz jus sum kinda wimpy green humies wit ugly pantz.  (Is an avid orc player.  my main problem with the DoW games is how wrong they got the orcs in terms of style, size, and gameplay.  Or maybe not wrong, since the DoW orcs are interesting...but they aren't the real 40k space orks :P).
A mistake is a mistake.
The same mistake twice is a bad habit.
The same mistake three or more times is a motif.