AuthorTopic: The Official Pixelopolis OT-Creativity Thread  (Read 101516 times)

Offline Indigo

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Re: The Official Pixelopolis OT-Creativity Thread

Reply #70 on: November 29, 2005, 12:43:01 am
just a quicky style expiriment... i was trying to mix a few different things i've seen.  I'm pretty sure i'm gunna pixel it soon

inspired by:
blick, david, ndeal, tim burton (a little), and myself

« Last Edit: November 29, 2005, 12:46:34 am by Indigo »

Offline Zach

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Re: The Official Pixelopolis OT-Creativity Thread

Reply #71 on: December 01, 2005, 02:30:03 am
i'm jealous T_T
EAT PUNAJI  BECAUSE IT'S GOOD AND TASTY

Offline Mercury Rising

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Re: The Official Pixelopolis OT-Creativity Thread

Reply #72 on: December 02, 2005, 01:43:12 am
Opps sorry I thought this was the OT thread too.  Anyway I have a poem I wan't crits on.  Please.
Morrowind:
The Locked Chest

O’ do I wonder what is inside that locked chest
Could the item locked inside truly be the best?
O’ what could it be?
Tell me!  Tell me!  Tell me!
For shame I cannot unlock
Yet for I get a shock
I remember the code
The one to end this ode
To boost my security skills
So I can unlock that box and pay my bills
Truly it must be worth a great deal
Yet to my surprise I feel
Unsatisfied, did this I truly earn?
To see inside of which I yearn
I get what I have honestly earned
For the chest is trapped, and I am burned
Now scorched and lifeless on the floor
I lay to marvel and adore
Those witty men and women who make the chest
Know how really to be the best
To truly win is not to cheat
For it’s the satisfaction you desire to meet
Not the ending cut scene or the bonus clips
But by winning honestly and with only tips
By MercRise
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Offline Hase

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Re: The Official Pixelopolis OT-Creativity Thread

Reply #73 on: December 02, 2005, 09:24:23 am
less chatter more art.

Offline Darien

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Re: The Official Pixelopolis OT-Creativity Thread

Reply #74 on: December 02, 2005, 11:27:33 pm
Mercury Rising:  Although I admire you for attempting a rhyming poem, and not going straight to free verse, I think you got a little too caught up in making each line rhyme, and haven't paid enough attention to rhythm.

Also, some things that annoy me:

"O’ do I wonder what is inside that locked chest
Could the item locked inside truly be the best?"

The use of "inside" twice in about the same place in each line bugs me.

Use more punctuation, you make use of question marks and exlcamation points but not periods.  Some lines are confusing, such as:

"For shame I cannot unlock
Yet for I get a shock  "

Does this read "For shame I cannot unlock / Yet, for I get a shock." ?  I think so, but reading through it the first time is awkward.

This poem stinks of lines whose only purpose is to rhyme.  This is the largest problem with this poem (aside fromt the subject matter, perhaps.  My favorite poems are generally ones that reveal an interesting way to look at something, or a feeling, not ones that preach, like this one... and ethics in video games, I feel, is not something that suits a poem). Lines that are only in place to rhyme clutter a poem and are unecessary.  Avoid them at all costs.  In a poem, every line should bring something to the poem.  Rethink these lines and ask yourself if you actually do something with them.

Now, I'm not an expert at poetry, so take this advice with a grain of salt.

Offline Mercury Rising

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Re: The Official Pixelopolis OT-Creativity Thread

Reply #75 on: December 03, 2005, 02:28:13 am
I took some of your ideas into account and came up with a whole new poem.
THE Locked Chest

A long hunt through dungeons
Lock picks used and saved
Yet what of those chests I’ve past
The ones I have left locked
What items could they contain?
Daedric?  Glass?  Ebony?
Or could it just hold bungler bane
Nevertheless I always think
What items could they contain?
A chest is up ahead
For I am presented with a option
Deep have I traveled into this cove
With lock picks running low I must choose
To save or to use
This question presents a problem
A gamble par say
One save a pick for a later chest
The other takes that chance
Uses left is way too low
Yet I can't help think
What items could they contain?
For the choice could make the difference
Debts or Cash
Skooma or Flin
Right or wrong

MercRise
« Last Edit: December 03, 2005, 02:32:46 am by Mercury Rising »
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Offline pixelblink

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Re: The Official Pixelopolis OT-Creativity Thread

Reply #76 on: December 03, 2005, 07:30:29 am
Well since we're posting poetry now... I wrote this one a ways back:

SEASONAL

spring

my heart
torn feet and blistered souls
aching to release
shattered and conformed

walk a thousand loves
bereft of energy
empty
lifeless

summer

my thirst
parched and whimpered tastes
anti-saliva to the masses
drink the sand

crawl to redemption
wait for the buzzards
shallow
nothingness

fall

my breath
crisply disenchanted and crackles
leaves without voices
offences from the noise

step through silence
anticipate the changes
gusting
windy

winter

my battle
eagerly wait for the next
barb-wired helmet
protection from the cold

pillage the abyss
drop the pin
hollowed
echoes

Offline Locrian

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Re: The Official Pixelopolis OT-Creativity Thread

Reply #77 on: December 03, 2005, 07:48:59 am
hey cool topic.  nice drawings Hase. 

I've been trying messing with oil paints for the past couple weeks.  This is tonight's study, scenes from Seven Samurai:

Offline robalan

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Re: The Official Pixelopolis OT-Creativity Thread

Reply #78 on: December 03, 2005, 08:34:36 am
Yay poetry.  Here are a couple I wrote a while ago.  I should write more; I don't do enough creative stuff.


Sheep

The road of gold is stretched before your feet,
The selfsame road continues far behind.
The path is not so hard to walk along,
Though rather boring, offering no new sights.

Still you are sure
That o'er the hill,
Around the bend,
Far off ahead--
Will lie a change.

But as you mount the hill and round the bend,
You find that nothing different lies ahead,
Though still inside your head you keep on thinking
That somehow there must be a way to change.

And passing all the gray and silent people,
The sounds of footfalls echoing through your head,
You start to realize that this road will go
Ahead of you on to infinity.

The road before you and the road behind
Are alike in every single little way.
So you survey the edge and look far down,
Considering the jump and then the fall.

How would it be to take that step of faith?
And would it hurt to fall so very far?
The questions rush around inside your brain,
And so you shut them out and take a chance.

As you take the step,
Leaving the endless golden road,
You realize that the edge holds no fall,
But a different path, with choices all your own.

After looking back at all the people,
Still caught amid the rat-race of their lives,
You turn about and head down your own path,
The escape from the road of the herd.


A Prayer for Ideas

Oh, form in us a curious heart,
That we forevermore may raise
Ideas that so quickly dart
Forever trapped within a maze.

Ideas that we hold within,
Protected from the cruel world,
Die, never to be seen again,
Never raised, like flags unfurled.

Remind us that ideas, like we,
Need air and light and love to grow.
So we must ever set them free,
That they may flourish, for we know:

A thought inside will surely die,
But one set free finds wings to fly.
Always remember: a preposition is not something you should end a sentence with.

Offline Darien

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Re: The Official Pixelopolis OT-Creativity Thread

Reply #79 on: December 03, 2005, 08:59:22 am
I haven't written any poetry in a while either.  Here's something that I'm not too embarassed to show:

A romantic could say
That God must be benevolent and kind.
For proof, he would point to you:
A beauty that must be from heaven.

I would be inclined to agree,
But in the end I would decide
That de Sade was right, and God is most cruel.
For proof, I'd need only your foul personality.


OMG BURN