I think the two biggest problems here are lack of contrast and.... polish, for lack of a better word. The face and hair look a little flat from lack of strong shadows and highlights, and the line art needs a bit of smoothing. The hair, in particular... it looks like the basic shapes have been blocked in, but not refined.

I did an edit to show you what I mean:



The darker shadows and brighter highlights help give some pop to the image, and help better define the forms. Same with the smoothing or refining, or whatever, of the lines. Most people will tell you that one of the keys of pixel art is exercising control, and careful pixel placement, making sure each dot's in the optimal spot. Like I said, the basic forms are blocked in in yours, they just need a little more love (check the jawline, hair highlights, etc. to see what I mean).

I don't see any reason to drop the 2x outlines. The only thing I'd suggest is that if you're gonna use them, you might want to outline the hair, too. If you were planning on doing that anyway, just pretend I stopped talking at the end of the las bit.

After abandoning this whole thing for a while, I've come crawling back to pixels.



I can almost taste the rust in this one. Help me?

I think part of the problem might stem from the fact that (in my eyes, anyway) the tentacles are a bit too thin or... something. Not... I dunno, chunky or tentacley enough. I did a quick edit:



I'm not really sure, and it's not a great edit. It's a suggestion, anyway.

Maybe a little late, as it seems you're taking this in a different direction now, but I did a bit of an edit:



Basically just some shading/colour alterations. I actually like the original much better than the new version. While the new one's more anatomically correct, it's still pretty stylized, and for me, if you're going to stylize it you may as well go all the way.

One thing to keep in mind: in your original (and your update) the white is wasted, in terms of shading. Even at, like, 10x zoom it's still barely distinguishable from the yellow. Even in my edit, the white is wasted. Maybe try using a darker colour as a mid tone?

New update. Mostly worked on various parts of the girl, but also tweaked cupid a bit (note the curlified hair), added the back-blood and probably did some other minor stuff.

Dopple: I hopefully fixed the breasts, and jeans. As for the head, it's the back of the head that seems flat, yes? If that's the case then... I know. I'm working on it. Not that it should be too hard, just that I haven't gotten too it yet. Next update, hopefully.

Gil: Good points, all around. Hope I touched on all of them, but I think I at least picked up on the most important stuff. I'm not real clear on what you mean about the leg seeming broken. Hopefully I fixed it, but if I didn't... elaborate for the benefit of the dumb?

Feron: I messed with cupie's hair. I may play with the wings a bit, too, but haven't gotten around to that part of the picture yet. The smoke will probably change, too. At the moment, it's supposed to be flowing into a heart shape, but it does look a bit awkward. I'll play with it.

Soup: Think I touched on all of that, 'cept the blood-puddle which, as I mentioned, will stay as is until the background is done, at which point it will be altered to fit.

Vellan: Slimmed the girl down quite a bit (slighter build, thinner through the shoulders and ribcage). Also, I changed a lot based on Sharm's and Wayuki's edits.

Sharm: Thanks for the edit. It helped me to see what you were talking about. If they aren't completely fixed, I think the pants look better now, anyway.

Wayuki: Wow, that's a great edit. That said, I... pretty much copied your work on the pants (and to a slightly lesser extent, the hoodie) for the update. I still have some work to do, obviously, but thanks in large part to your edit (and the accompanying crits), I think the girl's improved quite a bit.

Thanks very much for the crits and edits, guys. As always, it's greatly appreciated and incredibly helpful. right now, I think the biggest problem I'm having is deciding on a background... I'm... not so good at coming up with interesting backgrounds. I was thinking like, a generic-ish city park, but I dunno. Might end up being a bit dull? Whatever. Suggestions, as always, are very much welcome. Oh, and the rest is far from done, too, so many more crits, please!